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Help! I messed up big time.. Watch

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    (Original post by pizzle223)
    Basically I was seeing a girl and things were going pretty well although she lives kinda far from me.

    Anyway I had an operation last friday but the night before the operation I had sex with a different girl because i knew I wouldn't be able to have sex for a few weeks afterwards.

    Then last night the girl who I genuinly like came to see me while I'm recovering and told me how much she really liked me (more than I knew). I was pleased to hear this as I do like the girl.. we're pretty much on the sae wave length..

    BUT

    When I slept with the other girl she literally leftmy back covered in scratches and the girl I like saw the state of my back.. now she's understandably pissed. I made it worse as I didn't really think it was too much of a big deal, as all I really did was have sex with someone which most single people do.

    Either way the girl I like is pissed! BIG TIME... I don't think there is too much I can do but ask her forgiveness.. ANY IDEAS GIRLS????
    I think you've handled things terribly and of course she's pissed.

    What you should and should have done instead is explain some truths that we can actually take from your post.

    Firstly apologise, not because you've hurt her (regardless of if you have, DO NOT say "I'm sorry I hurt you". It'll come off as an arrogant and cocky move and you'll probably lose all hope of being with her) but because you acted selfishly.

    You were single.

    You like and liked her both now and at the time, a lot.

    But, you didn't realise that she liked you. As such you didn't feel like you'd made a commitment, because although your feelings were for her, you didn't know her feelings. Now there may be an argument for why she did or didn't tell you her feelings at the time. But the point is that you didn't know, not if you should have or should not have.

    Explain to her that these were unique circumstances.

    Finally apologise again firstly for the manner in which you told her, instead of being upfront you let her find out by seeing your back. Idiot move but easily done when you panic. And also because in hindsight you can see that it was the wrong thing to do, but that you didn't have much of a way of knowing that it was the wrong thing to do at the time.
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    Yes, I think what the person above said is true, the fact that you didn't knew exactly how she felt for you was one thing and the other thing that you were single made you do this, tell her that you truly like her and in future this incident may not be repeated as now you are clear with the fact that she likes you and on the other hand you damn like her too,
    No surprise the girl is pissed off, because she likes you, had the case that you knew about her feelings before the act you would not have indulge in the act you had but the case was different, make her sit with you and with all politeness and love make her understand the situation and apologise to her for the act and promise her that this would not be repeated in future.
    P.S : Make sure when you put the point about her feelings to her, you are not speaking in an arrogant tone, if your tone would slightly be raised at the time of conveying the particular thing, it will leave a very wrong impression that you are rude and blaming her for not conveying her feelings, and you might lose her altogether.

    Best of Luck
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    (Original post by Trigger)
    "I had sex with a different girl because i knew I wouldn't be able to have sex for a few weeks afterwards. " have some self control :erm:
    Bit harsh. Since when was having sex with someone a sign of a lack of self control?
    If we go down that line of thinking won't we all turn into puritans?

    /slippery sloping.

    (Original post by pizzle223)
    Good News! She forgives me!!!!!!!

    Although I'm sure she'll remind me of how much of a **** i am enough times in the future.

    More of being a stupid **** than a cheating **** as I had no idea I'd be seeing the girl and she can understand that I just wanted to get my end away before I can't use it for a while
    That's good news . If you're not officially mutually exclusive then I suggest you make it clear that that's what you want. And if you are, then I think that makes you her boyfriend and her your girlfriend. Enjoy!
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    (Original post by there's too much love)
    I think you've handled things terribly and of course she's pissed.

    What you should and should have done instead is explain some truths that we can actually take from your post.

    Firstly apologise, not because you've hurt her (regardless of if you have, DO NOT say "I'm sorry I hurt you". It'll come off as an arrogant and cocky move and you'll probably lose all hope of being with her) but because you acted selfishly.

    You were single.

    You like and liked her both now and at the time, a lot.

    But, you didn't realise that she liked you. As such you didn't feel like you'd made a commitment, because although your feelings were for her, you didn't know her feelings. Now there may be an argument for why she did or didn't tell you her feelings at the time. But the point is that you didn't know, not if you should have or should not have.

    Explain to her that these were unique circumstances.

    Finally apologise again firstly for the manner in which you told her, instead of being upfront you let her find out by seeing your back. Idiot move but easily done when you panic. And also because in hindsight you can see that it was the wrong thing to do, but that you didn't have much of a way of knowing that it was the wrong thing to do at the time.
    Thank you! For giving me a reply that is actually useful (although as you know it's sorted now.. kinda).

    But this is exactly what I was looking for when I wrote this thread.

    And cheers for sticking up for me in you're other post. People we're starting to make me think I'm crazy for having sex...
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    (Original post by pizzle223)
    Basically I was seeing a girl and things were going pretty well although she lives kinda far from me.

    Anyway I had an operation last friday but the night before the operation I had sex with a different girl because i knew I wouldn't be able to have sex for a few weeks afterwards.

    Then last night the girl who I genuinly like came to see me while I'm recovering and told me how much she really liked me (more than I knew). I was pleased to hear this as I do like the girl.. we're pretty much on the sae wave length..

    BUT

    When I slept with the other girl she literally leftmy back covered in scratches and the girl I like saw the state of my back.. now she's understandably pissed. I made it worse as I didn't really think it was too much of a big deal, as all I really did was have sex with someone which most single people do.

    Either way the girl I like is pissed! BIG TIME... I don't think there is too much I can do but ask her forgiveness.. ANY IDEAS GIRLS????
    Well from a guys point of view, you blew it mate. Even though it wernt official you were still seeing her then shagged someone else. Thats a nail in the coffin man, you buried this one.
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    (Original post by RemiMarcelle)
    I'm not surprised she's pissed because if you did actually like her, you wouldn't think twice about getting with anyone else


    Posted from TSR Mobile e
    This is like saying 'You can't play football with them, because you played football with those people the other day'. I'm not signed to a team so I'll enjoy myself playing football with whoever I like.

    What you mean is if you really liked someone you wouldn't think twice about getting with anyone else.
 
 
 
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