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Dumped by the same guy twice. watch

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    I was dating my boyfriend for about 6 months (I've already made a couple of threads about him on here). Although I wasn't very interested in the beginning, he pursued me quite ardently and wined and dined me loads, even sending little gifts to my work. We were really happy just dating for a while and as we met online and hadn't discussed being a proper couple, I kept my online dating profile up. He found out about this in private but never mentioned it to me - just quietly pulled away from me until I had no idea what was going on.

    Eventually, we discussed it and he told me it had hurt his feelings, so I took it down. A couple of weeks later, I got sick at a Xmas party and ended up going back to his house to stay the night. A few days later, he broke up with me in the middle of a fight in a public park in London, telling me he was too insecure to be with me, that we had moved from dating to being a couple too fast and that he just 'wasnt feeling it right now'. He then completely stopped speaking to me for about a week, when I texted him to apologise for my behaviour and he admitted that my dating site usage had really upset him. We then stopped all contact again and I started to heal, when he came back and said he missed me loads. We talked regularly for a couple of weeks and then ended up meeting up and getting back together. He told me he was crazy about me, he had never felt this way about any of his previous girlfriends and he wanted to be with me. We were incredibly happy for a while, although I never quite got over the way he just ditched me over Xmas. We had a great 3 months where we spent whole weekends together, made each other breakfast and just generally had an amazing time.

    Anyway, at the beginning of March he started to take a really long time to confirm plans with me - we'd have tentative time to see each other set aside and then if I tried to confirm with him, he would avoid the topic completely, and once completely stood me up. He could never ever make plans in advance, and he started to freak out about me accidentally leaving things at his place (like when I would sometimes take my hair out of a ponytail and forget the hairband). I also never met even one of his friends, and he kept me compartmentalised from the rest of his life, which really bothered me. We started to argue about his insecurity again and he started pulling away from me and being really distant, until I eventually confronted him about it yesterday and he told me he doesn't see a future with me, we're too different and he wants his freedom. I was completely knocked for six because he always, always talked about a future, having kids with me and referred to me as his 'wife' a number of times. He also did such amazingly sweet things for me, sent me flowers, took me out loads and bought me amazing presents, so I'm so shocked that he could just change his mind because of what was basically one argument. I'm so sad and depressed and don't feel like I'll ever be able to move on from this, let alone find somebody else I get on with so well.

    Doesn't sound as though he knows what he wants really and he's just messing you about. I think you should cut contact but this time don't go back to him. Time will heal and you will be able to move on eventually.
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    • Thread Starter

    (Original post by RHCPfan)
    Doesn't sound as though he knows what he wants really and he's just messing you about. I think you should cut contact but this time don't go back to him. Time will heal and you will be able to move on eventually.
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