Hey there! Sign in to join this conversationNew here? Join for free
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    Well there are basically 2 girls, one of them I like and then one of them I "like". The problem is I go out with the wrong one and I want to break up but can't as I feel like it is too early in the relationship.

    The First girl, E, is lovely, charming, reminds me a lot of myself, but one of the reasons I went out with her is because she reminds me of my ex. I she her a lot and we do get on well but it doesn't seem right, I want to keep things going with her but it gets harder everyday.

    The Second girl, S, is something else. I have known her for a couple years. She is used to my nonsense and plays along with it. She says she "Doesn't like physical contact" then falls asleep in my arms. She always seems to be helping me and told me to my face that I am not in the "friendzone". I wish I could tell her how I feel but then I would fell bad for E. Never actually felt like this before but I don't want to hurt anyone but I most likely will in the end up.

    Can anyone help?
    • #2
    #2

    How did you meet E? And how long have you known he? Do you talk to her a lot?
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    what do you mean its to early to break up? its probably going to happen at some point as you are clearly not happy with her and the later you leave it the worse it will be for her.

    earlier is better just do it.
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    You spend a lot more time regretting the things you didn't do as opposed to the things you did ​do. Break up with E and tell S how you feel. I wished I'd had that advice when I was in the same situation as you, but I left it literally one day too late and 4 years later still regret it.
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    Yeah the longer you leave it with the first girl, the worse you'll make it on her. If you truly feel the way you feel, you should end it ASAP

    Posted from TSR Mobile
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    "How did you meet E? And how long have you known he? Do you talk to her a lot?" Through friends, since August. I talk to her quite a bit saying she's my girlfriend.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    "what do you mean its to early to break up? its probably going to happen at some point as you are clearly not happy with her and the later you leave it the worse it will be for her.

    earlier is better just do it." That's true, thanks. I'll most likely do it.
    Offline

    4
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Well there are basically 2 girls, one of them I like and then one of them I "like". The problem is I go out with the wrong one and I want to break up but can't as I feel like it is too early in the relationship.

    The First girl, E, is lovely, charming, reminds me a lot of myself, but one of the reasons I went out with her is because she reminds me of my ex. I she her a lot and we do get on well but it doesn't seem right, I want to keep things going with her but it gets harder everyday.

    The Second girl, S, is something else. I have known her for a couple years. She is used to my nonsense and plays along with it. She says she "Doesn't like physical contact" then falls asleep in my arms. She always seems to be helping me and told me to my face that I am not in the "friendzone". I wish I could tell her how I feel but then I would fell bad for E. Never actually felt like this before but I don't want to hurt anyone but I most likely will in the end up.

    Can anyone help?
    It's not fair on E if you carry things on with her when you clearly don't feel the same. It'll just hurt her more as she will just get more attached as time goes on. Sometimes it just doesn't feel right between two people. Sometimes there just isn't enough passion there and you are better off being friends. I would end things with E. You are already crossing boundaries by letting S fall asleep in your arms. How would E feel if you told her that?

    You are not the bad guy for liking someone else. You will be the bad guy if you let something happen with S while you're still with E and that'll taint any good future you have with S forever due to guilt.
    Offline

    12
    ReputationRep:
    I think honesty with E is better. Emphasise (without ending up saying "it's not you, it's me") that you find her lovely, charming, and that she reminds you a lot of yourself. Then that you've realised that you don't love her in that way, and you feel terrible because you still think she's wonderful, but it isn't going to work as a relationship, and you're hoping you're early enough to not hurt her too badly.

    Firstly though... Really think it through - make sure you're not suffering from "the grass is greener on the other side". There will be downsides and annoyances with S as well. You don't want to regret not getting with S if it's genuine, but you also don't want to regret breaking up with E if it turns out you were just thinking the currently unattainable must be attained.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    You want S because you can't have her. Once you've broken up with E, you'll feel differently.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by hali0112)
    It's not fair on E if you carry things on with her when you clearly don't feel the same. It'll just hurt her more as she will just get more attached as time goes on. Sometimes it just doesn't feel right between two people. Sometimes there just isn't enough passion there and you are better off being friends. I would end things with E. You are already crossing boundaries by letting S fall asleep in your arms. How would E feel if you told her that?

    You are not the bad guy for liking someone else. You will be the bad guy if you let something happen with S while you're still with E and that'll taint any good future you have with S forever due to guilt.
    S fell asleep in my arms before I started going out with E.
    Offline

    4
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    S fell asleep in my arms before I started going out with E.
    See, you're a good guy, do the right thing! Don't make it harder on yourself
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by hali0112)
    See, you're a good guy, do the right thing! Don't make it harder on yourself
    Thank you.
 
 
 
Reply
Submit reply
TSR Support Team

We have a brilliant team of more than 60 Support Team members looking after discussions on The Student Room, helping to make it a fun, safe and useful place to hang out.

Updated: April 6, 2013
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • Poll
    Would you like to hibernate through the winter months?
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

    Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

    Quick reply
    Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.