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Clubbing in relationships yes or no? Watch

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    Im going to sound hypocritical but I really dont get the concept of going clubbing regulary if your in a realtionship.

    Granted i go clubbing maybe once every 2 weeks at uni and once every 3 months at home, as i just find clubs are full of people trying to get with one another or girls who are virtually naked trying to find guys etc etc

    My boyfriend goes clubbing though 2 times a week every week to the same club, and i just find it a bit wierd that if your in a relationship why would you bail on seeing your partner for a club>

    so what are your views on clubbing while in a relationship, if say your partner does it every week and puts it above seeing you what would you choose a night in with your partner or a night out with your friends?
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    Why not? Clubs aren't just for going to find sex - most people there leave on their own. Some people like dancing, some people like socialising, some people like drinking etc. and that doesn't change when you're in a relationship. Obviously some sacrifices need to be made, but people need the freedom to do what they want too.
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    I never step in a club with the sole intention of 'trying to get with another'. I go for the music, the banter and the drunken giggles!
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    I know that the correct, mature response is to say something along the lines of "People don't go to clubs jus to pull" and "If you're in a relationship with someone you should trust them 100% at all time anyway".

    But the sad reality is almost all of my friends have cheated on their girlfriends when they've been clubbing, and I've seen more than my fair share of girls getting with guys when I knew they were with someone else aswell. Quite often, both the girls and guys attribute to it being a 'terrible drunken mistake' or something, and I just wonder whether they would have been better off not going to the club at all if they couldn't control their own behaviour?
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    (Original post by Rybee)
    I never step in a club with the sole intention of 'trying to get with another'. I go for the music, the banter and the drunken giggles!
    Brilliant. What does 'the banter' entail exactly?
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    (Original post by Like a BAWS)
    I know that the correct, mature response is to say something along the lines of "People don't go to clubs jus to pull" and "If you're in a relationship with someone you should trust them 100% at all time anyway".

    But the sad reality is almost all of my friends have cheated on their girlfriends when they've been clubbing, and I've seen more than my fair share of girls getting with guys when I knew they were with someone else aswell. Quite often, both the girls and guys attribute to it being a 'terrible drunken mistake' or something, and I just wonder whether they would have been better off not going to the club at all if they couldn't control their own behaviour?
    OP, on initial thought- no, there is nothing wrong with clubbing if your in a relationship. For example, in my city there is a regular club night that everyone goes to just because the music is awesome!

    However, I do agree with this poster in bold.

    I myself have got with guys in clubs that I didnt know had girlfriends until after (some were long term- 3 years etc). Even some of my very good guy mates who 'hate cheaters' and seem to hugely love their girlfriends have cheated whilst clubbing- some I was very shocked to find out.

    If he is going for the music with a group of guy mates then chances are he wont be getting with anyone.
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    i go because i like going dancing, not because i'm trying to pull someone. My OH's have never had a problem with this, it would be nice if they'd join me and my friends but i've always picked OH's who don't go clubbing. But there is always is other days in the week to see them.. If they ere out most of the week then it would be a problem
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    I go to dance as I love dancing to really loud music. Plus because everyone is at least tipsy there are always funny stories to tell afterwards so I wouldn't mind if a boyfriend went clubbing
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    Same as the poster above, for me its somewhere to go and dance. I like being able to go out with my friends, dance, have a laugh and have a good time, and most of the time my bf is perfectly happy to come too.
    Also clubs are free in my town so its a cheap night out.

    And actually come to think of it i dont have any mates who have cheated out clubbing, (in fact im questioning if i know anyone who has) my social group just doesnt think of nights out clubbing for that kind of thing, nor have they cheated.
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    My problem is simply that the people there presume everyone not already dancing with someone of the opposite sex is fair game for surprise grinding/pulling. That's just not ok. Everyone just assumes you're single and ready/willing for a grind, grope or whatever. That's my main reason for avoiding clubs entirely whilst I'm in a relationship and also whilst I'm not.
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    (Original post by Like a BAWS)
    I know that the correct, mature response is to say something along the lines of "People don't go to clubs jus to pull" and "If you're in a relationship with someone you should trust them 100% at all time anyway".

    But the sad reality is almost all of my friends have cheated on their girlfriends when they've been clubbing, and I've seen more than my fair share of girls getting with guys when I knew they were with someone else aswell. Quite often, both the girls and guys attribute to it being a 'terrible drunken mistake' or something, and I just wonder whether they would have been better off not going to the club at all if they couldn't control their own behaviour?
    I agree with you mate.

    I think in some ways it depends on the club you go to, the people you're with and how much you drink knowing what you're like when you're drunk.

    You make sacrifices in a relationship for gains. You don't go out to pull or be promiscuous (whether that promiscuity leads anywhere or not) in exchange for the emotional support and specialness that having a loving partner brings.
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    (Original post by Like a BAWS)
    I know that the correct, mature response is to say something along the lines of "People don't go to clubs jus to pull" and "If you're in a relationship with someone you should trust them 100% at all time anyway".

    But the sad reality is almost all of my friends have cheated on their girlfriends when they've been clubbing
    , and I've seen more than my fair share of girls getting with guys when I knew they were with someone else aswell. Quite often, both the girls and guys attribute to it being a 'terrible drunken mistake' or something, and I just wonder whether they would have been better off not going to the club at all if they couldn't control their own behaviour?
    That's quite sad. I don't find it hard not to cheat on my girlfriend when I go clubbing, which I do quite regularly. It's good fun, I never went primarily to pull anyway.
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    My boyfriend and I both go to seperate unis, we go clubbing together and seperatly.
    It's a chance to socialise with friends and meet new people and get hammered.
    I really enjoy it, yes people only go to pull but if you go to the right club or go with the right people then it doesn't matter what other people's intentions are.
    In my experience, the dogey-er the club the higher percentage of people just looking to pull.
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    No, I would never club my partner.


    On a serious note, why not? Clubs are to pick up people. They are for people to enjoy themselves dancing etc. Also, choosing to spend time with your partners always at the rejection of other social events is unhealthy.
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    I don't go clubbing to pull! I'm sure some people do, but me and my friends just like going out and dancing and stuff.
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    I've never gone to a club with the intention of getting with somebody. It's just a chance to go out with mates and have a good night. Why would you stop doing that just because you're in a relationship? Why don't you go out as well? You can meet each other whilst out or at the end of the night to go home.

    If you repeatedly stop doing the things that you enjoyed before your relationship in favour of seeing partner it's a sure way to kill it.
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    So your basically one of those girls who think guys should spend every waking moment with their GF and sees choosing to see their friends as some kind of personal attack?

    People have friends who's time and company they enjoy, you need to sort your insecurities out or it will ruin your relationship.
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    (Original post by Like a BAWS)
    I know that the correct, mature response is to say something along the lines of "People don't go to clubs jus to pull" and "If you're in a relationship with someone you should trust them 100% at all time anyway".

    But the sad reality is almost all of my friends have cheated on their girlfriends when they've been clubbing, and I've seen more than my fair share of girls getting with guys when I knew they were with someone else aswell. Quite often, both the girls and guys attribute to it being a 'terrible drunken mistake' or something, and I just wonder whether they would have been better off not going to the club at all if they couldn't control their own behaviour?
    The problem with this is that it implies they only cheated because they went to a club, and if they hadn't then they wouldn't.

    IMO, if you think you have to stop your bf/gf from going clubbing in case the environment is gonna somehow make them cheat, then you already have big, big problems.
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    People hitting on your ladyfriend can be pretty lulsy.
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    Seems a bit inappropriate given what usually happens in clubs. I don't like clubbing so I can't give a personal view.
 
 
 
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