Ok people, so I'm 21 yr old female, and I work full time and I find it hard and very difficult to take a relationship with a guy on, even though if I fancy/like him or whatever.
I feel because I have a lack of family and friends and not much social life, it makes conversations boring (btw I dont really like talking on the phone for tis reason) also because I have nothing to share about my boring life, while he talks about his.
So what can I do? Sometimes I fear what will happen if I get married, I get really worried, I'm so anti social and I feel all those comitments in the relationship will be really heavy for someone so simple like me.
The situation would still be the same if I didnt work, - perhaps maybe worse, becasue he would be in more contact and I would be so boring etc.
SO guys what shall I do? Does this happen to you? Am I just a weirdo?
I find it hard to take on a relationship as I have no life? Watch
- Thread Starter
- 07-04-2013 16:53
- 07-04-2013 20:55
The reason theyre not working out is cos theyre not the right guys
You will find your match
- 07-04-2013 20:59
Try dating sites.
- 07-04-2013 21:13
"Simple like me" - you really think your simple?
You need to get the ball rolling with people - friend equals more friends
Your not simple, just more like un-confident about your self. Offend when people talk and talk about what they've done bal da bal, it's just there good at making conversation and in many cases people just talk thing up.
You ever watch "perks of being a wallflower" - I no Hollywood cheese right, but there's a meaning full message there, which might relate to you a little.Last edited by CheeseMunchies; 07-04-2013 at 21:14.
- 07-04-2013 21:14
Sounds like a confidence issue.
If you feel like you have a boring life, its probably affecting more than just your relationships. Why don't you try to make it more interesting by getting a hobbie or two. When you feel happier you will have more confidence and find your relationships work better.
- 07-04-2013 21:33
You don't always need to talk about past social events and stuff. You can talk about pretty much anything. Your interests, life in general, philosophy, how you view the world etc.
I myself am not the sort of person who likes conversing about events that happened or things that people said, now that's boring.
- 08-04-2013 00:01
No, you're not a weirdo. My advice is to stop looking for a relationship and concentrate instead on your social life. People will tell you that you're seeing the wrong guys and that a lack of social life won't matter, but this is wrong. You need to have people in your life other than a boyfriend. It's not healthy to base your life around one person, and I'll bet you'd be happier with a social circle. And if the current lack of a social circle is affecting your confidence, then you really shouldn't be dating until you are feeling happier in yourself and your life. What's your current living situation? If you're living at home and your wages could allow you to move out, I would advise you do so. Don't get somewhere on your own - look into house or flatshares. It's cheaper to live with others anyway. Is there anyone at work you get on with? Maybe suggest you do something outside work? Think about joining clubs too, and if there are any old friends you've lost touch with, drop them a line to see how they are.
- 08-04-2013 00:02
I know exactly what you mean, like I'm not into any hobbies at the moment so I feel a bit boring when I first meet someone. I always end up acting 'mysterious' and avoiding talking about myself, which works tbh, most people prefer talking about themselves anyway.
Also I've met loads of people who have exciting lives and hobbies who bore the **** out of me, like they have nothing about them. And people with 'boring' lives who are fun and great to spend time with. It's all about personality and connection, yeah it's good to have stuff in common but that's nothing without chemistry.
Remember a lot of people embellish their stories and their lives probably aren't as great as they make out. And what the guy above said about it being a confidence issue is totally true. Don't be ashamed of who you are...