I was with my ex-boyfriend for about 6 months and we were really happy together. However, he has a big problem with feeling insecure around me due to things that happened early on in our relationship. We ended up having a huge argument around a month ago about him being distrustful and quizzing me on where I had been on a Friday night. This basically ruined our relationship and he eventually admitted that he can't cope with the insecure feelings that he has when I go out with male friends on nights out. We broke up because of this.
I was just wondering if anyone has had these kind of trust/insecurity issues with their partner before and if they ever managed to get over them if they were reassured enough? I want to move forward now, but I'm wondering what to do if I come across somebody who shows the same signs as my ex did. Should I end it before it starts?
Being massively insecure: do you ever get over it? Watch
- Thread Starter
- 07-04-2013 21:14
- 15-04-2013 21:31
I think you can reassure someone people, it depends how bad their trust issues are.
Some people will just never trust you and it's something only they can work out on their own.
- 15-04-2013 21:38
One of the questions here is what happened early on in the relationship?
This could be *anything* and hence the failure/success of your future relationships is based on how you deal with the situation you haven't fully explained.
Source: a guy who is massively insecure
Posted from TSR Mobile
- 15-04-2013 21:47
Yep, you can get over it. Reading between the lines, I'm guessing you hurt him early on, but both decided to carry on with the relationship. If you want to be with this guy, then you'll need to give him time to fully trust you again - this is normal. But if you don't want to be with him, don't use his insecurity as a way to get out of the relationship without being the "bad guy". There's no shame in wanting out of a relationship, as long as you do it honourably.
- 15-04-2013 21:54
It's the sort of thing you can support someone with but they really need to learn to validate themselves unfortunately, else he'll still be insecure as he'll feel his self-worth is tied to you.