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    I've just realised that I completely and utterly fit the bill of a 'nice guy', with all the typical, disgusting underlying complexes motivating me.

    Has anyone else sort of abruptly realised the sum of all of their character flaws? I'm honestly quite worried and unsure of how to proceed.
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    Try to look on the positive side, what your good characteristics are. Being a 'nice guy' is really not a bad thing at all, to be honest i'd be more worried if you fit the bill as a 'prick'
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    (Original post by Sword25)
    Try to look on the positive side, what your good characteristics are. Being a 'nice guy' is really not a bad thing at all, to be honest i'd be more worried if you fit the bill as a 'prick'
    Completely agree! Nice guys are always the ones who win in the end.

    What sort of disgusting motivations do you think contribute?


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    (Original post by Tuerin)
    'Nice guy'; not 'Good guy'. The nice guy is covertly manipulative, his nice front is only a charade to get in the girl's pants. Often they aren't even aware of their passive aggression themselves. The OP has realised this in himself, having previously been unaware. I believe this is the consensus in the expert community, not that I am one myself, only a messenger...
    I think that's the case more often than not.
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    I kinda did once, then started uni and ironed out most of these flaws. Basically stopped being a pussy - as in if I liked a girl, I would DO something about it...
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    (Original post by Tuerin)
    'Nice guy'; not 'Good guy'. The nice guy is covertly manipulative, his nice front is only a charade to get in the girl's pants. Often they aren't even aware of their passive aggression themselves. The OP has realised this in himself, having previously been unaware. I believe this is the consensus in the expert community, not that I am one myself, only a messenger...
    I would say a nice guy is kinda what I was, good guy is now what I am. Anybody else successfully and mostly made this change?
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    everyone has flaws, even floors. even even floors.
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    (Original post by Tuerin)
    Only the completely wasted phrase like that

    HAD A FEW TOO MANY, TONIGHT, EH? I SAID, I, I SAID: HAD A FEW TOO MANY TONIGHT, EH?!
    Nope, in a slightly silly mood perhaps but not drunk, drunk nights on tsr, wild!

    It was more of a play with words.
    Floors, flaws, even uneven floors have flaws.

    I like puns 👀 ... bad puns


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    (Original post by sufferin succotash)
    everyone has flaws, even floors. even even floors.
    I laughed :P


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    I think I come under a "nice" guy, and I realised it a while back but haven't changed because it would be out of character, and its hard to change yourself so much.
    I'm still completely thick when it comes to girls and what to do. I mean, I can chat to them (sort of) but the more attractive they are, the worse I am.
    I weird most out because my body signals/voice must come across defensive. i.e subconsciencely do so to make sure nothing can happen.

    As a nice guy, it isn't to get into there pants at all. I don't act the way I do to do so. Its fear. All fear, and incredibly hard to change.

    There is a girl I like, but I don't think I could ever ask her out, unless the situation came around naturally (i.e at a party), and even that failed once.
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    (Original post by shandak)
    I laughed :P


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    Thank you


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    I am sure you are not a nice guy to everyone.
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    (Original post by Kage)
    I think I come under a "nice" guy, and I realised it a while back but haven't changed because it would be out of character, and its hard to change yourself so much.
    I'm still completely thick when it comes to girls and what to do. I mean, I can chat to them (sort of) but the more attractive they are, the worse I am.
    I weird most out because my body signals/voice must come across defensive. i.e subconsciencely do so to make sure nothing can happen.

    As a nice guy, it isn't to get into there pants at all. I don't act the way I do to do so. Its fear. All fear, and incredibly hard to change.

    There is a girl I like, but I don't think I could ever ask her out, unless the situation came around naturally (i.e at a party), and even that failed once.

    This is what I categorize a nice guy as. Someone who more often than not finds himself in the friend zone because they are just so nice to the girl they like.

    I've never thought of a nice guy as someone who is trying to get in to a girl's pants, because lets be honest, that's not nice. He could be considered a nice guy at first but if there are ulterior motives then it turns into a different category altogether.

    But hey, ask the girl out, even to hang out. Better than waiting around for her to find someone else. This is coming from a girl, too. Even if she doesn't feel that way she'll most likely still want to be friends and then you can find someone who does like you.
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    My problem is slightly different. My difficulties didn't arise at the initiation stage of relationship; on the contrary, I boldly declared my ~feelings~ for her (and 'got' her). However, I basically "nice guy'd" said girlfriend, to the extent that I essentially got friendzoned whilst going out with her. She recently dumped me, and I began to harbour feelings of disturbing acute anger/self-loathing (manifesting in standard post-rejection "nice guy" behaviour).

    I guess this is more of a "pls help me to get over my girlfriend", with slightly atypical circumstances, now that I think about it.
 
 
 
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