Hey there! Sign in to join this conversationNew here? Join for free
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    Hi

    I have a fantastic daughter who is amazing and is extremely bright. She left school with 11 A*s, 3 As, and a B. But!! She is really struggling at college. She has had poor results and is extremely disillusioned with college life and seems ready to quit.

    I have told her to get help from college but seems reluctant to raise and of her issues with the college. She wanted to be a doctor six months ago but says that has gone right out of the window. She has no idea what she wants to be or what to do.

    What advice can I give her other than to speak to the college? She is reluctant to speak to us as parents.

    Paul
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    Firstly, I greatly appreciate your concern as a father, Paul. It is perfectly reflected through this thread you have created, your daughter is lucky to have a dad like you, so dont lose hope =)
    Now, judging from her results, she must have been a terrific student. However, if college has so suddenly deflated her, something that was significant enough to make things so diifficult must have happened. Therefore, I suggest that u talk, not only with the college, but also with her fellow colleagues, teachers, etc, preferably without her knowing, as she may perceive it as a 'privacy invasion' though you dont mean it that way. Dont let her feel despaired- help her regain her confidence through proving to her her capabilities. Let her take a break if that's what she needs, help her to understand that your love is not conditional nor based upon her academic performance, but rather nconditional regardless of who she is. Make her feel comfortable, and be patient and wait for whenever she feels she can share her worries/troubles with you. Dont force her, and try your best to pinpoint the cause of her downfall, which is definitely temporary God willing!
    I believe that more than advice, she need reassurance, rest, and love.
    Best of luck!
    Offline

    13
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Nats_Dad)
    Hi

    I have a fantastic daughter who is amazing and is extremely bright. She left school with 11 A*s, 3 As, and a B. But!! She is really struggling at college. She has had poor results and is extremely disillusioned with college life and seems ready to quit.

    I have told her to get help from college but seems reluctant to raise and of her issues with the college. She wanted to be a doctor six months ago but says that has gone right out of the window. She has no idea what she wants to be or what to do.

    What advice can I give her other than to speak to the college? She is reluctant to speak to us as parents.

    Paul
    I was similar to your daughter. I did well in my GCSEs and so carried on at my school's sixth form to do A-levels, but it all just fell to bits. I always knew I wanted to be a teacher, but I realised that I wasn't going to be able to get the A-levels. I completed my A-levels anyway, but only came out with 2 Ds. Before the exams, I'd withdrawn my UCAS application and found myself a job in a relevant field. I've been working in a nursery for 5 years now (not the original plan - was only supposed to be a year) and ended up with Level 3 NVQ and BTEC, and am going to uni in September to fulfill my dreams and train as a primary school teacher
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Nats_Dad)
    Hi

    I have a fantastic daughter who is amazing and is extremely bright. She left school with 11 A*s, 3 As, and a B. But!! She is really struggling at college. She has had poor results and is extremely disillusioned with college life and seems ready to quit.

    I have told her to get help from college but seems reluctant to raise and of her issues with the college. She wanted to be a doctor six months ago but says that has gone right out of the window. She has no idea what she wants to be or what to do.

    What advice can I give her other than to speak to the college? She is reluctant to speak to us as parents.

    Paul
    I was in a similar position last year. I got 8A*s and 2As at GCSE and then came out with ABCC at A level, needless to say I was pretty disappointed. I have applied for medicine (with two offers) and I did do some resits. Best advice would be if she's struggling with science-content to get specifications and do loads of past papers to help learn the markscheme answers to certain questions. Also just let her know that it can be hard but there are plenty of fields she can look at, as I'm assuming she took chemistry and at least one other science, maybe nursing/pharmacy/psychology/biomedical sciences etc.
    Tell her to keep her chin up really that's the main thing to do, if she works hard then she should be able to get good grades still, we have a month or so left that's plenty of time to turn things around. At the end of the day bad marks/results in mocks etc. can only help and aid learning.
    Offline

    14
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Nats_Dad)
    Hi

    I have a fantastic daughter who is amazing and is extremely bright. She left school with 11 A*s, 3 As, and a B. But!! She is really struggling at college. She has had poor results and is extremely disillusioned with college life and seems ready to quit.

    I have told her to get help from college but seems reluctant to raise and of her issues with the college. She wanted to be a doctor six months ago but says that has gone right out of the window. She has no idea what she wants to be or what to do.

    What advice can I give her other than to speak to the college? She is reluctant to speak to us as parents.

    Paul
    I think your daughter just needs to find herself. There can be a lot of pressure on students in school and college to go to university. Your daughter shouldn't be having problems in college with GCSE grades like that, perhaps she isn't interested in her subject/s anymore?

    Maybe you should try and have a proper chat with her. Maybe take her for lunch or something just the 2 of you and discuss things? Ask her what exactly she is struggling with. Maybe you could advise her to study something else next year?

    It won't be the end of the world if your daughter decides to drop out of college. PLENTY of people drop out at 16/17 and end up going back to college, and even on to University as young as 19. Maybe she will quit college, get a job, and realise what she wants from life - it's what happened to me.

    Sometimes when our parents keep telling us how proud they are of us going to college and maybe going to university etc, and we lose passion for what we're studying it is hard to tell our parents that we aren't interested anymore.

    Don't give up on her. Like I said, she maybe just needs to find herself, and find what her passion is
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    I would suggest talking to her and seeing why she doesn't want to be a doctor and why she is not enjoying college


    Posted from TSR Mobile
    Online

    21
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Nats_Dad)
    Hi

    I have a fantastic daughter who is amazing and is extremely bright. She left school with 11 A*s, 3 As, and a B. But!! She is really struggling at college. She has had poor results and is extremely disillusioned with college life and seems ready to quit.

    I have told her to get help from college but seems reluctant to raise and of her issues with the college. She wanted to be a doctor six months ago but says that has gone right out of the window. She has no idea what she wants to be or what to do.

    What advice can I give her other than to speak to the college? She is reluctant to speak to us as parents.

    Paul
    look at other collages or schools a change of sceanary can do a world of good also she may be experimenting with drugs and this may account for her drop in grades whatever listen to her and try and find answers she needs to talk to you not her collage. Maby she as a diffrent issue maby she is pregant or may she has started to have feelings for other girls whatever you need to speek to her to fix this.
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by jonathanemptage)
    look at other collages or schools a change of sceanary can do a world of good also she may be experimenting with drugs and this may account for her drop in grades whatever listen to her and try and find answers she needs to talk to you not her collage. Maby she as a diffrent issue maby she is pregant or may she has started to have feelings for other girls whatever you need to speek to her to fix this.
    She has sorted a few things out and has a clearer picture of what she wants to do now. The drugs thing is a most definite no, she won't even smoke as she knows how bad it is. This is a girl who won't even take a paracetamol for a headache.

    We talked and it seems to be a combination of taking too many hard subjects, bad advice, bad tuition and stress which had led to her feeling the way she did. She has now been to quite a few universities, and is visiting more so that she can get a feel for the places.
    Offline

    17
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Nats_Dad)
    She has sorted a few things out and has a clearer picture of what she wants to do now. The drugs thing is a most definite no, she won't even smoke as she knows how bad it is. This is a girl who won't even take a paracetamol for a headache.

    We talked and it seems to be a combination of taking too many hard subjects, bad advice, bad tuition and stress which had led to her feeling the way she did. She has now been to quite a few universities, and is visiting more so that she can get a feel for the places.
    That all sounds positive. It could be that she needs something to focus on for the end of college so that she doesn't get disillusioned by her current situation and lose focus. Have you considered looking at moving colleges for her second year of A levels? Some colleges will allow students to join for the 2nd year, particularly if they have taken their AS exams on the same exam board as the one studied at the new college. It might be worth speaking to schools/colleges in your local area to see if that could be an option.

    In terms of applying for medicine, taking a year out after A levels could be the best option for your daughter as otherwise she would have needed to have made her UCAS application by 15th October of this year, which is difficult if right now she isn't enjoying her studies and isn't sure if she wants to do medicine. If she is serious about medicine then she needs to be careful that she doesn't take resits and ruin her chances of applying to some courses. Some medical schools do not allow exam resits even within the normal 2 years of A levels whereas others are okay with that, but not if the student takes 3 years to do A levels unless there are exceptional circumstances such as illness. I believe the latter is the position of the majority of medical schools, but you can find more detailed information in our medicine forum or on the information guides: http://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/wiki/Medicine
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    I was a medicine applicant but got poor AS grades, I did a couple of retakes and managed to get into pharmacy. I've now graduated from pharmacy with a fantastic 2 1! I was exactly the same as your daughter - did well at GCSEs but had terrible circumstances during A-levels but with those GCSE grades she will be just fine! Even if she has to do a couple of retakes here and there she will be find sounds like a bright spark!
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Sherlockedd)
    I was in a similar position last year. I got 8A*s and 2As at GCSE and then came out with ABCC at A level, needless to say I was pretty disappointed. I have applied for medicine (with two offers) and I did do some resits. Best advice would be if she's struggling with science-content to get specifications and do loads of past papers to help learn the markscheme answers to certain questions. Also just let her know that it can be hard but there are plenty of fields she can look at, as I'm assuming she took chemistry and at least one other science, maybe nursing/pharmacy/psychology/biomedical sciences etc.
    Tell her to keep her chin up really that's the main thing to do, if she works hard then she should be able to get good grades still, we have a month or so left that's plenty of time to turn things around. At the end of the day bad marks/results in mocks etc. can only help and aid learning.
    WHICH UNI'S did you apply to? -did you get AAA prediction from ABCC-im in that situation now....
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by popping567)
    WHICH UNI'S did you apply to? -did you get AAA prediction from ABCC-im in that situation now....
    I applied to Manchester, Leicester, Newcastle and Keele
    I got AAA and am going to Leicester come September

    It's completely possible to do it as long as you put in the work
    Good Luck
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Sherlockedd)
    I applied to Manchester, Leicester, Newcastle and Keele
    I got AAA and am going to Leicester come September

    It's completely possible to do it as long as you put in the work
    Good Luck
    aww, thank-you so much. what do you suggest in terms of applying to london uni's-i wanna live with family. and good luck to you too, i hope everything goes well for you!
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by popping567)
    aww, thank-you so much. what do you suggest in terms of applying to london uni's-i wanna live with family. and good luck to you too, i hope everything goes well for you!
    Depends on the unis, I didn't really look into London uni's but I think you can probably apply to St Georges with your grades
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Sherlockedd)
    Depends on the unis, I didn't really look into London uni's but I think you can probably apply to St Georges with your grades

    Not looking to add anything just popping in the thread to say what an awesome username you have
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Sherlockedd)
    I was in a similar position last year. I got 8A*s and 2As at GCSE and then came out with ABCC at A level, needless to say I was pretty disappointed. I have applied for medicine (with two offers) and I did do some resits. Best advice would be if she's struggling with science-content to get specifications and do loads of past papers to help learn the markscheme answers to certain questions. Also just let her know that it can be hard but there are plenty of fields she can look at, as I'm assuming she took chemistry and at least one other science, maybe nursing/pharmacy/psychology/biomedical sciences etc.
    Tell her to keep her chin up really that's the main thing to do, if she works hard then she should be able to get good grades still, we have a month or so left that's plenty of time to turn things around. At the end of the day bad marks/results in mocks etc. can only help and aid learning.
    random question- which unis did you get the offers from ? and did you take the UKCAT ?
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Mindspanking)
    Not looking to add anything just popping in the thread to say what an awesome username you have
    Ahahaha fair enough, yours is pretty unique as well my friend :L

    (Original post by FutureHeartSurg)
    random question- which unis did you get the offers from ? and did you take the UKCAT ?
    Leicester and Keele (got an interview from Manc but rejected post interview). And yes I did the UKCAT - it's pretty much essential unless you apply to 4 London unis :L
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Sherlockedd)
    Depends on the unis, I didn't really look into London uni's but I think you can probably apply to St Georges with your grades
    i know, but they want 3A's at a-level and im going to try to do that+more, but i just think-will they consider my application? as compared to those who have all A's. isnt about the kind of doctor you will be rather than.. a slip of an as grade? i just hope/want them not to ignore me due to my as grades-which will change for the better in a2.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Mindspanking)
    Not looking to add anything just popping in the thread to say what an awesome username you have
    popping huh?
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by popping567)
    i know, but they want 3A's at a-level and im going to try to do that+more, but i just think-will they consider my application? as compared to those who have all A's. isnt about the kind of doctor you will be rather than.. a slip of an as grade? i just hope/want them not to ignore me due to my as grades-which will change for the better in a2.
    Most unis ignore AS results because private schools aren't obligated to provide them, they'll go off your target grades. As long as you're predicted AAA or above then you should be fine (I was predicted A*AA)
 
 
 
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • Poll
    Brussels sprouts
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

    Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

    Quick reply
    Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.