my mum - feel down :( Watch

Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 12 years ago
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I feel really bad and depressed at the mo. My mum has been ill for a few weeks with a heart problem - its nothing serious but she has slight chest pains and she has pills for it. Shes being really doom and gloom though and keeps swearing and complaining that its happening to her. I keep trying to cheer her up by saying it could be worse but she just shouts at me.
Shes very hard to live with at the moment. I'm on study leave for my A2 exams next month and I'm trying to revise but she expects me to do everything, even read her text messages for her. I thought I was doing quite well, as I've been looking after my disabled brother (taking him to and from school, keeping him occupied etc), doing all the housework and cooking as well as revising. But today she had a go at me for not doing the washing up once (I was upstairs revising) and she has been generally irritable and quite rude all day.

I just feel really down. Ive apologised to her (even tho i dont really think ive done much wrong) but shes basically told me to shut up and that Im not doing enough ('if my mum had been ill i wouldnt need to be asked twice to help etc etc' ). Now Im starting to feel guilty as well because I have to balance my revision with looking after her. She also moans to my nan, which I dont think is fair because she has started ****ging me off too. Im really feeling the pressure now as I need 3 As to get to the uni I want next year. What should I do?
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smartangel
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confront her about it....not when shes pissed though....but tell her you are doing your best to please her and keep her happy, yet try to emphasise how important your A-level revision is...i know its hard...but try your best///
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Timeslikethese
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I feel really bad and depressed at the mo. My mum has been ill for a few weeks with a heart problem - its nothing serious but she has slight chest pains and she has pills for it. Shes being really doom and gloom though and keeps swearing and complaining that its happening to her. I keep trying to cheer her up by saying it could be worse but she just shouts at me.
Shes very hard to live with at the moment. I'm on study leave for my A2 exams next month and I'm trying to revise but she expects me to do everything, even read her text messages for her. I thought I was doing quite well, as I've been looking after my disabled brother (taking him to and from school, keeping him occupied etc), doing all the housework and cooking as well as revising. But today she had a go at me for not doing the washing up once (I was upstairs revising) and she has been generally irritable and quite rude all day.

I just feel really down. Ive apologised to her (even tho i dont really think ive done much wrong) but shes basically told me to shut up and that Im not doing enough ('if my mum had been ill i wouldnt need to be asked twice to help etc etc' ). Now Im starting to feel guilty as well because I have to balance my revision with looking after her. She also moans to my nan, which I dont think is fair because she has started ****ging me off too. Im really feeling the pressure now as I need 3 As to get to the uni I want next year. What should I do?
Have it out with her, she needs a wake up call. Tell her she's quite capable of reading her own texts and that you do enough, that she needs to keep active and that if she continues to mope she'll get depressed and when u go to uni who will pick up the pieces then? Tell her you're even playing mum to your brother and that enough is enough - you need to revise and you will help out but it's too much and it's unfair of her to treat you like a slave
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Rock Fan
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You need to tell her although you will try and do everything you can, your career depends on these A Levels she needs to understand that, does she want her daughter to fail, is there no one else who can help her?
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frappuccino
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Gosh that's a really bad situation to be in I think your mother is being very irrational and is venting her frustrations on you, which is really unfair. I think you should try to be really patient and kind but talk to her and explain that you have to revise for these few weeks and ask her to please not ask you to do so much for her. Say that you are really concerned etc but you just have to do this otherwise it'll be awful for your future.. if she cares then she'll stop bugging you so much..and if not just don't spend so much time at home.
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1013
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That's terrible. I'm sure your mum is down at the mo but doesn't she realise that she could be seriously affecting your future with her behaviuor? It commendable that you have been doing so much for your family but you also need to think about yourself. Is there anywhere you could go to revise, like a library or go to a friends house or something? I think you need to get out of the house so you can concentrate. Your exams are the important thing here; housework will just have to take a backseat.
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Timeslikethese
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(Original post by frappuccino)
and if not just don't spend so much time at home.
excellent idea - do revision at college, stay later some nights n utilise ur free periods xx
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Anonymous #1
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Report Thread starter 12 years ago
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Thanks for the help. Its difficult not to spend time at home though, as my college is on study leave and expects us to do home study and not come in. And my mum is glad that I have the opportunity now to stay at home in case anything happens and she feels ill. I might start going to a mate's to study
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Timeslikethese
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Thanks for the help. Its difficult not to spend time at home though, as my college is on study leave and expects us to do home study and not come in. And my mum is glad that I have the opportunity now to stay at home in case anything happens and she feels ill. I might start going to a mate's to study
or even the library xx
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frost105
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Just call her on it. She's the mother, its her house, its her job. Yes you should help out but you shouldnt be RUNNING the place. I would stay out of the house as much as possible.
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