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Why do boys brought up by single mothers often have LESS respect for women? Watch

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    I've noticed among my male friends that all those who were brought up by their mothers exclusively (or mostly) tend to treat girls a lot worse than those who were raised by both parents (or those whose parents were divorced but still saw their fathers a lot).

    A disproportionate number of them regularly refer to girls (even the ones they're seeing) by demeaning terms like "slut" and "*****", speak to me and other girls as though we're from another planet, have very few true female friends apart from tomboys, make fun of or look down on common female interests like fashion and so on specifically because they're things girls tend to like, think the phrase "like a girl" is an insult, don't understand what's socially appropriate regarding dirty humour and often do things like repeatedly say "bet that couple are going to be shagging in a few hours" till it's no longer a joke at parties, and generally treat women and girls as inferior sex objects. Oddly enough, very few of them could be called "masculine" boys or alpha-male types either - they're not popular players, and they gossip, backstab and are cattier than a lot of the girls I know.

    Don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to disrespect guys brought up by single mothers or imply that they're all like this - I know some with a huge amount of respect for women who treat their girlfriends like princesses. I also know a lot of guys generally who behave like the above.

    What I don't understand is why guys raised by single mothers wouldn't have more respect for women, given the unusual amount of strong female influence in their lives? I know there's a tendency to see single mothers as uneducated chavs with no idea how to raise a child, and there are stats that show that most criminals were raised by single mothers etc., but most of the guys I'm talking about have well-educated mothers who got divorced after having children (and most of those mothers are also pretty nice people.)
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    (Original post by Ezekiella)
    I've noticed among my male friends that all those who were brought up by their mothers exclusively (or mostly) tend to treat girls a lot worse than those who were raised by both parents (or those whose parents were divorced but still saw their fathers a lot).

    A disproportionate number of them regularly refer to girls (even the ones they're seeing) by demeaning terms like "slut" and "*****", speak to me and other girls as though we're from another planet, have very few true female friends apart from tomboys, make fun of or look down on common female interests like fashion and so on, think the phrase "like a girl" is an insult, don't understand what's socially appropriate regarding dirty humour and often do things like repeatedly say "bet that couple are going to be shagging in a few hours" till it's no longer a joke at parties, and generally treat women and girls as inferior sex objects. Oddly enough, very few of them could be called "masculine" boys or alpha-male types either - they're not popular players, and they gossip, backstab and are cattier than a lot of the girls I know.

    Don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to disrespect guys brought up by single mothers or imply that they're all like this - I know some with a huge amount of respect for women who treat their girlfriends like princesses. I also know a lot of guys generally who behave like the above.

    What I don't understand is why guys raised by single mothers wouldn't have more respect for women, given the unusual amount of strong female influence in their lives? I know there's a tendency to see single mothers as uneducated chavs with no idea how to raise a child, and there are stats that show that most criminals were raised by single mothers etc., but most of the guys I'm talking about have well-educated mothers who got divorced after having children (and most of those mothers are also pretty nice people.)
    Really? I've been brought up mostly by my mum and I've never seen women as being inferior, but at the same time you don't deserve any extra attention because you're female

    People make fun of fashion, but that doesn't make them sexist for instance. I personally don't "get" fashion. I have a particular style, but I don't really "do" fashion

    That being said, I massively criticise my parent's culture at times when it comes to equality and stuff, so maybe Im not the kind of person you were expecting to reply

    Actually scrap that. This is TSR. You won't find many type of people you're describing here
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    From what I've noticed, it's because their mothers aren't prime examples of females as it is. From MY observations, before anyone jumps on me.
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    (Original post by de_monies)
    Really? I've been brought up mostly by my mum and I've never seen women as being inferior, but at the same time you don't deserve any extra attention because you're female

    People make fun of fashion, but that doesn't make them sexist for instance. I personally don't "get" fashion. I have a particular style, but I don't really "do" fashion

    That being said, I massively criticise my parent's culture at times when it comes to equality and stuff, so maybe Im not the kind of person you were expecting to reply

    Actually scrap that. This is TSR. You won't find many type of people you're describing here
    It's not really making fun of fashion etc. because it's fashion, more picking on female hobbies or stuff women do in general (for example, I study long hours because I'm a medic and would rather start revising early than cram, and one of my friends who has a single mother commented that "What a waste of the holidays, that's such a girl thing to do!")

    Another of my friends was told off by a different guy for not knowing about some obscure football player but "you're female hence have no understanding of sports". Yet another who's East Asian had her high-pitched voice mocked repeatedly in a shrill tone behind her back. Guys brought up by single mothers (or at least I know) just often seem to see women as inferior, which I find very strange given that (educated) single mothers are probably pretty capable and have more influence over their sons' lives than they would if they had partners.

    (Original post by HopefulMidwife)
    From what I've noticed, it's because their mothers aren't prime examples of females as it is. From MY observations, before anyone jumps on me.
    That's what I would have thought, but like I said I know a lot of these guys' mothers and most of them are pretty nice people and well-educated. Surprisingly though, these guys actually tend to treat girls who are nicer (like their mothers) worse than those who are *****y...
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    (Original post by HopefulMidwife)
    From what I've noticed, it's because their mothers aren't prime examples of females as it is. From MY observations, before anyone jumps on me.
    Id agree tbh. And not just their mothers, but their fathers as well

    (Original post by Ezekiella)
    It's not really making fun of fashion etc. because it's fashion, more picking on female hobbies or stuff women do in general (for example, I study long hours because I'm a medic and would rather start revising early than cram, and one of my friends who has a single mother commented that "What a waste of the holidays, that's such a girl thing to do!")
    Oh wow. That's not a female, nor a male thing to do. More a geeky thing (I call myself a geek) May be a waste of holidays according to them, but you're reaping the rewards in the future

    (Original post by Ezekiella)
    Another of my friends was told off by a different guy for not knowing about some obscure football player but "you're female hence have no understanding of sports".
    Tbf, this is a stereotype which does have some truth in it. On average, women are less interested in sports. Im not really in to sports myself. I like gym, cycling, badminton but when's the last time you see those sports on TV? Besides, I don't like watching sport, so I'd have no clue either

    (Original post by Ezekiella)
    Yet another who's East Asian had her high-pitched voice mocked repeatedly in a shrill tone behind her back. Guys brought up by single mothers (or at least I know) just often seem to see women as inferior, which I find very strange given that (educated) single mothers are probably pretty capable and have more influence over their sons' lives than they would if they had partners.
    They might still be "bad" parents though?

    (Original post by Ezekiella)
    That's what I would have thought, but like I said I know a lot of these guys' mothers and most of them are pretty nice people and well-educated. Surprisingly though, these guys actually tend to treat girls who are nicer (like their mothers) worse than those who are *****y...
    Hmm not sure
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    Nice unproven generalisations there.
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    Don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to disrespect guys brought up by single mothers or imply that they're all like this - I know some with a huge amount of respect for women who treat their girlfriends like princesses. I also know a lot of guys generally who behave like the above.
    Wasn't trying to generalise, like I said obviously I have nothing against guys brought up by single mothers, I just noticed that this was sometimes the case and was curious as to why.
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    It's not fair to generalise just based upon a few of your own personal experiences...
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    Really? The men I know who were only brought up by their mothers seem to me to have a lot more respect towards women than people who were raised by both parents/only by their father. My boyfriend was brought up by a single mother and he acts around women exactly the same as he acts around other men. My younger brother seems to be going in a similar direction with my mother.

    Then again I don't see gentlemanly behaviour and putting women first as "respectful" towards women. In fact I look at it in the opposite way - I find it demeaning. I also think that those people are the ones who are more likely to get married and then decide that they're the heads of the househols and take control of everything.
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    (Original post by Imperial_Maniac)
    Nice unproven generalisations there.
    She said this was in her experiences, therefore her evidence is personal but not necessarily highly representative (though that doesn't stop it from potentially being right).
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    (Original post by Dragonfly07)
    Really? The men I know who were only brought up by their mothers seem to me to have a lot more respect towards women than people who were raised by both parents/only by their father. My boyfriend was brought up by a single mother and he acts around women exactly the same as he acts around other men. My younger brother seems to be going in a similar direction with my mother.

    Then again I don't see gentlemanly behaviour and putting women first as "respectful" towards women. In fact I look at it in the opposite way - I find it demeaning. I also think that those people are the ones who are more likely to get married and then decide that they're the heads of the househols and take control of everything.
    I don't mean some of the guys I know don't put women first - I mean having a demeaning attitude towards women particularly (as in often making sexist remarks and so on, as I said in my first post). Wasn't trying to generalise either, obviously this is just based on my experiences .
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    (Original post by CJKay)
    She said this was in her experiences, therefore her evidence is personal but not necessarily highly representative (though that doesn't stop it from potentially being right).
    Taking personal experience and presuming that is the same for everyone is what generalisation is.
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    (Original post by Imperial_Maniac)
    Taking personal experience and presuming that is the same for everyone is what generalisation is.
    Don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to disrespect guys brought up by single mothers or imply that they're all like this
    I'm not going to repeat myself again over this, but you need to reread my first post - I wasn't generalising or attempting to do so.
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    I was brought up by my mum (father worked away). I don't believe I treat women as inferior.

    Generalizations are always rubbish.
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    (Original post by Ezekiella)
    I'm not going to repeat myself again over this, but you need to reread my first post - I wasn't generalising or attempting to do so.
    So what exactly is your point? Some people are dicks, some aren't.
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    Their father's probably did, so that may be why...
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    (Original post by Ezekiella)
    I've noticed among my male friends that all those who were brought up by their mothers exclusively (or mostly) tend to treat girls a lot worse than those who were raised by both parents (or those whose parents were divorced but still saw their fathers a lot).

    A disproportionate number of them regularly refer to girls (even the ones they're seeing) by demeaning terms like "slut" and "*****", speak to me and other girls as though we're from another planet, have very few true female friends apart from tomboys, make fun of or look down on common female interests like fashion and so on specifically because they're things girls tend to like, think the phrase "like a girl" is an insult, don't understand what's socially appropriate regarding dirty humour and often do things like repeatedly say "bet that couple are going to be shagging in a few hours" till it's no longer a joke at parties, and generally treat women and girls as inferior sex objects. Oddly enough, very few of them could be called "masculine" boys or alpha-male types either - they're not popular players, and they gossip, backstab and are cattier than a lot of the girls I know.

    Don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to disrespect guys brought up by single mothers or imply that they're all like this - I know some with a huge amount of respect for women who treat their girlfriends like princesses. I also know a lot of guys generally who behave like the above.

    What I don't understand is why guys raised by single mothers wouldn't have more respect for women, given the unusual amount of strong female influence in their lives? I know there's a tendency to see single mothers as uneducated chavs with no idea how to raise a child, and there are stats that show that most criminals were raised by single mothers etc., but most of the guys I'm talking about have well-educated mothers who got divorced after having children (and most of those mothers are also pretty nice people.)

    What you don't understand is that a lot of the time these boys are not conscious or aware of what they are doing.

    Very often these are psychological effects of of some sort of abuse from their single mothers - this goes straight into the back of the boys' heads and becomes part of the subconscious.

    Single mothers have to take at least part of the blame. You have to ask why they could not get along with their souses to the extent of divorce ? I can bet they have a history of failed relationships with males - Fathers, Brothers, ex-boyfriends etc.

    Yes the reason is that they may have been abused themselves but what they should do is to grow a pair and take on their abusers directly instead of the cowardly action of taking it out on innocents like their own children. It means that they have no respect or love for their own children - overridden by their own selfishness, insecurity and cowardice.

    So next time you meet one of these guys why not talk to them about it, give them support and help them instead of letting their guilty mothers get off Scot free.
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    I've only known one or two lads brought up by single parent mums and to be honest they have been complete fruits but whilst I think there may be more general correlations out there I'm not too quick to jump on a causal train of thought

    If you were looking for answers to a statistical conundrum (supposing what you've observed is representative of male attitudes in this cohort at large) then you might start with strain on parenthood/parenting resources (including time/energy) and an absence of (appropriate) male role models ~ rather important in male development :beard:
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    massive generalization of course but single mothers don't tend to be the best representation of women, hence why they're single mothers in the first place
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    (Original post by Imperial_Maniac)
    Taking personal experience and presuming that is the same for everyone is what generalisation is.
    Except she didn't presume it was the same for everybody, hence "in my experience".
 
 
 
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