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Sick of Being Messed Around watch

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    Long story short, there's a guy I went to school with who I became good friends with in my last year, I then left to go to college and didn't see him due to his being at school. Anyways, he leaves school and I see him around way more often and become good friends with him.

    We get closer, and he knows more about me than a lot of people and then it becomes kinda sexualised? Idk.. But it is literally the definition of mixed messages - one minute it's like 'hey lets have sex' and then another it's like 'LOL no'. I am completely cool if it's just sex - but I like to know where I stand. I don't like being messed around - and this has happened 3 times in two weeks...

    And then he's like this with loads of other girls and I kinda realise I'm just one in a line - which really hurts. And my mentality is kind of like two fingers to you, I'm leaving in September - but at the same time, I would get with him in a heartbeat. Basically, what do I do... :L is it completely unreasonable to want to know where I stand?

    or you can tell me to get a grip, that's fine too :P
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    Yeah give it a rest with this guy. 3 times, 2 weeks. Yeah that's enough. Start looking elsewhere, even if they only want sex. - least make sure he's making his intentions clear. It's annoying when people don't tbh.
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    Thought as much :L I honestly do not mind if it's just sex - but I like knowing exactly where I stand on stuff. And yes, it is VERY annoying.
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    (Original post by Rosasaurr)
    I am completely cool if it's just sex...

    ...And then he's like this with loads of other girls and I kinda realise I'm just one in a line - which really hurts.
    You tell yourself you're cool with just sex because that's what he wants and you want him. Be honest with yourself. If you didn't have feelings for him this wouldn't hurt. Were you expecting monogamy from a friend with benefits? You can only be friends with benefits if you wouldn't flinch if you saw them get with someone else.
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    true - but I don't know, it wasn't so much knowing he wouldn't get with me, it was also his point blank refusal to acknowledge I existed, when he'd said I was supposed to be one of his best friends. And also, the way he's acting it's like we COULD get together, maybe, but I would rather know if it was never gonna happen, or if it was just sex or something more - because at least that way I'd know exactly where I was standing.
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    Its not unreasonable. You need to face him and just ask, and not be afraid of the answer. It also depends on what your looking for, do you want just sex or do you want a relationship? because from what you've said he sounds like you are just another girl that he sleeps with, male pride and all that jazz

    If you want just sex from him, then stick with it. If your confused about where you stand it sounds like you want a relationship? But ask him best way to find out!
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    #1

    I was kind of in the same situation as you, he was telling me he liked me, but i couldn't be completely sure because he texts lots of other girls too... Anyway, i believed him, we got with eachother after he told me how beautiful, smart and the nicest girl ever i am. Then my gut instincts proved me right after drunken texting him and he told me he has another girl in the pipeline that he was telling the same things to me. Self confidence: 0.
    ANYWAY- if he isn't fully into you through the mixed messages, don't go there... Trust your gut instinct, 99.9% of the time YOU are right.
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    (Original post by CharlieEmma)
    Its not unreasonable. You need to face him and just ask, and not be afraid of the answer. It also depends on what your looking for, do you want just sex or do you want a relationship? because from what you've said he sounds like you are just another girl that he sleeps with, male pride and all that jazz

    If you want just sex from him, then stick with it. If your confused about where you stand it sounds like you want a relationship? But ask him best way to find out!
    I don't know, I'm not really 'good' with relationships - I get bored WAAAAY too easily, and I think our personalities would clash, and I don't really want to be tied down when I leave... so I think just sex BUT I would rather quite like to know if he's just messing me around or if he's actually serious, like why say 'oh lets have sex' and then just ignore me for a week o.O
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I was kind of in the same situation as you, he was telling me he liked me, but i couldn't be completely sure because he texts lots of other girls too... Anyway, i believed him, we got with eachother after he told me how beautiful, smart and the nicest girl ever i am. Then my gut instincts proved me right after drunken texting him and he told me he has another girl in the pipeline that he was telling the same things to me. Self confidence: 0.
    ANYWAY- if he isn't fully into you through the mixed messages, don't go there... Trust your gut instinct, 99.9% of the time YOU are right.
    true, very true.... I guess leaving well alone is probably the best option tbh
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    (Original post by Rosasaurr)
    true, very true.... I guess leaving well alone is probably the best option tbh
    Maybe so, just go with your instincts. Just thought i'd pass on my experience to you seeing as i started falling for the guy and the whole situation has left me quite hurt. Mixed messages=bad=end up hurt :P
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Maybe so, just go with your instincts. Just thought i'd pass on my experience to you seeing as i started falling for the guy and the whole situation has left me quite hurt. Mixed messages=bad=end up hurt :P
    indeedy ah well... his loss because I am amazing and fantastic :L (well I can pretend I am)
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    (Original post by Rosasaurr)
    like why say 'oh lets have sex' and then just ignore me for a week o.O
    Because that's what guys do. A lot of guys pretend to be interested in women, pretend to be their friends, and pretend to really be into them as a person for no other reason than that they get sex out of it. If there are two or three girls on the go then it doesn't really matter which one you get with - none of them are special enough for you to really want a relationship with, so you just tell them what they want to hear and get sex whenever there isn't a better option available.

    Sounds harsh, but it's better to recognise that's how things work because then it's impossible to have your feelings hurt.
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    (Original post by bank_midge)
    Because that's what guys do. A lot of guys pretend to be interested in women, pretend to be their friends, and pretend to really be into them as a person for no other reason than that they get sex out of it. If there are two or three girls on the go then it doesn't really matter which one you get with - none of them are special enough for you to really want a relationship with, so you just tell them what they want to hear and get sex whenever there isn't a better option available.

    Sounds harsh, but it's better to recognise that's how things work because then it's impossible to have your feelings hurt.
    again true =/ but I don't see why, if he was doing that, he wouldn't go through with actually having sex - because he knows that I would, and that I wouldn't ask anything more of him either... GRRR I AM GOING TO LIVE UNDER A ROCK BECAUSE HUMANS ARE TOO CONFUSING

    overdramatic??
 
 
 
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