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    Hello, I'm 19 and a male, I DO trust my girlfriend and I know she isn't the type of girl to flirt or cheat... However I can't get the ideas out of my head, no matter how hard I try, I love her to pieces, I do trust her, I just worry... I have had some bad relationships... One cheated on my right infront of me, sober and knew she was doing it, another was more manipulative and tried to make me think ( Because it was a long distance relationship ) The "Post code rule applys" Where you can cheat on someone without it being called cheating because of the "Pose code rule" ( It's a stupid rule either way ) I love my girlfriend more than anything, but my jealousy is too much, even I can see it, I'm surprised she has put up with me for so long to be honest, I don't want to lose her because of me being stupid and not believing my own trust in her... I trust her with my life and she'd never do anything that would hurt me like that or hurt me at all... We have never argued, we talk things over, and we've been together for almost 16 months
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Hello, I'm 19 and a male, I DO trust my girlfriend and I know she isn't the type of girl to flirt or cheat... However I can't get the ideas out of my head, no matter how hard I try, I love her to pieces, I do trust her, I just worry... I have had some bad relationships... One cheated on my right infront of me, sober and knew she was doing it, another was more manipulative and tried to make me think ( Because it was a long distance relationship ) The "Post code rule applys" Where you can cheat on someone without it being called cheating because of the "Pose code rule" ( It's a stupid rule either way ) I love my girlfriend more than anything, but my jealousy is too much, even I can see it, I'm surprised she has put up with me for so long to be honest, I don't want to lose her because of me being stupid and not believing my own trust in her... I trust her with my life and she'd never do anything that would hurt me like that or hurt me at all... We have never argued, we talk things over, and we've been together for almost 16 months
    You're going to drive yourself crazy thinking this way, and you're going to tarnish this relationship. It's not nice, but there will generally always be someone in life that will hurt you, but if you can't let go of the past and treat everyone completely anew then you're really going to struggle to have a successful relationship.
    Being able to 'let things go' is key for life anyway, not just relationships.
    This doesn't mean you let people walk over you. You're the one that's going to suffer the most, and most people wont stand for accusations for long.

    A relationship is like a business investment, or starting your very first business as an entrepreneur. You have to put everything into it, otherwise it's not going to work. You can't expect to open a cafe and then just turn up a few hours and hope for the best...it wont last the year.
    If the investment pays off then you're going to have something beautiful at the end of it, hell maybe even marriage and kids!

    Are you not ready to put your full heart into it?

    Also, distrust can really mess with you if you're not careful. It's the basis for living your life, and i've seen people get really unwell.
    You probably trust people everyday, and it's a big fundamental in society without even realising it;
    When you cross the roads you're trusting the drivers not to run you over. When you get on a bus you're trusting that people will not harm you.
    It's like having a fear of flying.
    Trust is really important, and life is miserable without it.

    Hope I helped
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    (Original post by Apocaly)
    You're going to drive yourself crazy thinking this way, and you're going to tarnish this relationship. It's not nice, but there will generally always be someone in life that will hurt you, but if you can't let go of the past and treat everyone completely anew then you're really going to struggle to have a successful relationship.
    Being able to 'let things go' is key for life anyway, not just relationships.
    This doesn't mean you let people walk over you. You're the one that's going to suffer the most, and most people wont stand for accusations for long.

    A relationship is like a business investment, or starting your very first business as an entrepreneur. You have to put everything into it, otherwise it's not going to work. You can't expect to open a cafe and then just turn up a few hours and hope for the best...it wont last the year.
    If the investment pays off then you're going to have something beautiful at the end of it, hell maybe even marriage and kids!

    Are you not ready to put your full heart into it?

    Also, distrust can really mess with you if you're not careful. It's the basis for living your life, and i've seen people get really unwell.
    You probably trust people everyday, and it's a big fundamental in society without even realising it;
    When you cross the roads you're trusting the drivers not to run you over. When you get on a bus you're trusting that people will not harm you.
    It's like having a fear of flying.
    Trust is really important, and life is miserable without it.

    Hope I helped

    I am actually proposing to her this summer, like I said, I do trust her, she isn't that type of girl to sleep around, I get jealous way too easily too, It's silly, I love her to pieces and I know I can trust her, she is perfect, I don't know how else I can say it, But I need to convince myself that, I have trusted people before and they have hurt me so much, but you have helped actually and given me something to think about I'll let you know how it goes if you like?
 
 
 
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