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Generic relationship post, feeling a bit lost, please help Watch

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    I'll try and make this as clear as I can. For a few months towards the end of last year, I was in a relationship with a boy called Sam who I'd been good friends with for about three years previously. Unfortunately when it came to us actually being together, he treated me pretty horribly and broke up with me in a cowardly and nasty way, which was really hurtful, especially as I'd thought he was this great and thoughtful person (which other people have since said to me they never understood why I saw that in him).

    Despite promising to remain friends he made no effort to do so and therefore we haven't spoken since just after Christmas. It took a long time but I'm finally at the stage where I can say I have no interest in being friends again as I feel that nothing good would come of it - I'm lucky enough to have quite a few really nice friends who have been there for me through everything, I don't feel like I "need" him anymore, which has been a long time coming.

    Myself and my friends have also been quite friendly with some of the boys in his friendship group as we were all at college together - from this I know that several of his friends, while not exactly being shocked by his behaviour towards me, agree that he was really unfair and nasty, for no good reason. One boy in particular, Alfie, was a really good friend to me throughout everything and although he no longer particularly cares for Sam (partially because Sam has changed a lot since being on his gap year while the rest of us are at University (drugs etc), and partially because of Sam's treatment of me) but they are still in the same friendship group and will see eachother fairly often in the holidays from University.

    Alfie and I have become really close lately, and the long and short of it is that we do really like eachother. However strongly I felt for Sam he never actually made me feel this happy and I'm not sure any other person has either. However, I'm so nervous about being in another relationship any time soon because I thought I knew Sam so well but he turned out to be everything I thought he wasn't - also I'm worried that people would judge me for going for my ex's friend, although this was in no way intentional and I do not think Sam himself would even be bothered because he has not shown a great deal of care towards me at all.

    I'm just feeling a bit lost, I really like this boy and I don't think he'll turn out anything like Sam... it's just that I didn't think Sam would turn out like Sam either, if that makes sense.

    I'm so awful at explaining myself but if anyone needs any clarification of the situation in order to give me advice, just ask! Thank you.
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    This guy treated you like rubbish and it sounds like most people are taking your part, so I wouldn't worry about them judging you. People will always judge you for something, and if this guy makes you really happy then you should go for it Hope it works out better this time
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    • Thread Starter
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    (Original post by aspirinpharmacist)
    This guy treated you like rubbish and it sounds like most people are taking your part, so I wouldn't worry about them judging you. People will always judge you for something, and if this guy makes you really happy then you should go for it Hope it works out better this time
    I think I do tend to worry a bit too much about what people think of me. Thanks for your lovely words!!
 
 
 
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