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hes so experienced and i just feel stupid Watch

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    Im in a relationship with this guy, both 3rd year Uni students. Im a virgin and he keeps telling me to wait till im ready, he wont rush me, hes never tried anything without my permission and he really is amazing.

    The only problem is he is VERY experienced and its making me really feel crap. He mentions his sexual encounters ''ive taken quite a lot of girls virginities and they enjoyed themselves'' or he mentions his ex's (which he has a LOT of). Like i dont even wanna know what his sex number is because it would make me feel crap.

    Its not really the sex that bothers me, but the fact hes had about 10 relationships and I just feel like Im going to be another girl whose virginity he takes and then means nothing to him.

    I really like him and Ive spoken about this with him and he keeps telling me how important I am to him and he feels differently about me, but it feels like he probably said the same thing to the hundreds of other girls before.

    How do I get over this stupid insecurity?

    Every time he brings his ex's up or his sexual encounters it just makes me feel really crap.
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    Tell him how you feel about it. Tell him it makes you feel like an idiot or whatever and that you don't really want to heard about his past conquests. If he cares and isn't just a boastful ******** he will stop.


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    I'm no psychologist but that sounds like he's trying to emotionally manipulate you. Either that or he is just boosting his ego by proclaiming himself a 'sexgod'
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    It doesnt sound like a 'silly' insecurity to me, i think i would be a little insecure if he kept mentioning the amount of girls he's slept with. Firstly, ask him to stop mentioning all his ex's all the time - tell him his bragging makes you feel insecure and makes him appear like a user (and a bit of a man slut!). Its not right for him to be mentioning all his sexual encounters anyway :/
    I'll be honest, he doesn't sound great. You really need to establish trust and security first in the relationship, before allowing him to take your virginity. How long have you been together?
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    tell him bye bye, you have saved your self? he sounds horrible! sleeping with alot of people isnt something you brag about, especially to a girl you like?


    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Im in a relationship with this guy, both 3rd year Uni students. Im a virgin and he keeps telling me to wait till im ready, he wont rush me, hes never tried anything without my permission and he really is amazing.

    The only problem is he is VERY experienced and its making me really feel crap. He mentions his sexual encounters ''ive taken quite a lot of girls virginities and they enjoyed themselves'' or he mentions his ex's (which he has a LOT of). Like i dont even wanna know what his sex number is because it would make me feel crap.

    Its not really the sex that bothers me, but the fact hes had about 10 relationships and I just feel like Im going to be another girl whose virginity he takes and then means nothing to him.

    I really like him and Ive spoken about this with him and he keeps telling me how important I am to him and he feels differently about me, but it feels like he probably said the same thing to the hundreds of other girls before.

    How do I get over this stupid insecurity?

    Every time he brings his ex's up or his sexual encounters it just makes me feel really crap.
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    (Original post by Lemonzaz)
    It doesnt sound like a 'silly' insecurity to me, i think i would be a little insecure if he kept mentioning the amount of girls he's slept with. Firstly, ask him to stop mentioning all his ex's all the time - tell him his bragging makes you feel insecure and makes him appear like a user (and a bit of a man slut!). Its not right for him to be mentioning all his sexual encounters anyway :/
    I'll be honest, he doesn't sound great. You really need to establish trust and security first in the relationship, before allowing him to take your virginity. How long have you been together?
    My first post may spund kinda wrong, but he really is nice, he hasnt tried to force me or even mention sex, hes said he will let me tell him when im ready.

    He doesnt mention his ex's or sex all the time but just occasionally they come into conversation.

    For example, a few days ago he was comparing me to his ex saying how much better i was....and i didnt see the need for it.

    Im just feeling down because i like him a lot but dont want to be used.

    Weve only been together a couple of weeks, but seeing each other a couple of months.
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    If someone really likes you, they don't mention their past encounters at the risk of tainting your image of them.

    You're just gonna be another one on his hitlist, I guarantee it. 10 relationships? More like 10 victims.
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    (Original post by TreeOfKnowledge)
    I'm no psychologist but that sounds like he's trying to emotionally manipulate you. Either that or he is just boosting his ego by proclaiming himself a 'sexgod'
    In what way?

    I am usually a bit passive so it would be easy for him to do!
    Can you explain?
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    trust me stay away, i have friends that are like that. they say what they can to make them sound sweet, have it and then say bye and dont speak to them again. he will be patient as he knows he will get it

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    My first post may spund kinda wrong, but he really is nice, he hasnt tried to force me or even mention sex, hes said he will let me tell him when im ready.

    He doesnt mention his ex's or sex all the time but just occasionally they come into conversation.

    For example, a few days ago he was comparing me to his ex saying how much better i was....and i didnt see the need for it.

    Im just feeling down because i like him a lot but dont want to be used.

    Weve only been together a couple of weeks, but seeing each other a couple of months.
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    (Original post by oursecret3)
    trust me stay away, i have friends that are like that. they say what they can to make them sound sweet, have it and then say bye and dont speak to them again. he will be patient as he knows he will get it
    he waited a year for his ex and they were together for several years?
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    how do you know he wasnt doing things behind her back? Keeping her as a rebound?

    Hes not that old? so how will he have been with someone several years but strill slept with people so many times
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    (Original post by oursecret3)
    how do you know he wasnt doing things behind her back? Keeping her as a rebound?

    Hes not that old? so how will he have been with someone several years but strill slept with people so many times
    we were friends before we got into a relationship and he told me the times he cheated and the times he didnt and he didnt cheat on her.

    he lost his virginity in year 9 and has had a long line of girlfriends.
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    up to you, you seem like a nice girl

    follow how you feel! how old r u?
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    Rule of TSR

    If you ask for relationship advice you're going to be told to dump him and that he's evil and so on..


    It sounds like he likes you, and if he's waiting until you're ready then keep him waiting. Say to him these things, and he might stop talking about it. I know that when I was younger I didn't realise how socially inept it was to talk about sexual exploits with ex's, until someone told me. And now I don't, and have been with the girl who told me for many years.

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    he lost his virginity in year 9 and has had a long line of girlfriends.

    That said, it does sound like he's just compensating a bit to make himself sound more attractive to you. If you were to phrase the discussion along the lines of 'I find it really unattractive how many women you've been with' he'd probably come out and admit the times he's exaggerated.
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    Show him this thread.
    If he's honest he won't dump you.
    If he isn't you got to know early enough.

    Problem solved
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    (Original post by Hal.E.Lujah)
    Rule of TSR

    If you ask for relationship advice you're going to be told to dump him and that he's evil and so on..


    It sounds like he likes you, and if he's waiting until you're ready then keep him waiting. Say to him these things, and he might stop talking about it. I know that when I was younger I didn't realise how socially inept it was to talk about sexual exploits with ex's, until someone told me. And now I don't, and have been with the girl who told me for many years.




    That said, it does sound like he's just compensating a bit to make himself sound more attractive to you. If you were to phrase the discussion along the lines of 'I find it really unattractive how many women you've been with' he'd probably come out and admit the times he's exaggerated.
    thank you and yes i notice TSR are quick to say ''dump'' lol

    Another thing that bothers me is when he sends me text messages of things he wants to do with me i.e. sexual, i cant help but wonder 'has he done this before' and then feel crap again.
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    I was a virgin when I met my boyfriend and he had slept with alot of girls into double figures and like you I felt like **** i kept comparing myself to these girls worrying he'd just leave me for somebody more experienced but we took it at my pace and year over im still with him
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    People on tsr do tend to be quite cynical, such as oursecret3's response. He doesn't sound like an arse to me, he sounds like he genuinely likes you, and just happens to be experienced. Next time it comes up in conversation just say that you're not really comfortable talking about his exes because you're a bit insecure about being so inexperienced. As long as he's not a jerk, he'll understand.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Im in a relationship with this guy, both 3rd year Uni students. Im a virgin and he keeps telling me to wait till im ready, he wont rush me, hes never tried anything without my permission and he really is amazing.The only problem is he is VERY experienced and its making me really feel crap. He mentions his sexual encounters ''ive taken quite a lot of girls virginities and they enjoyed themselves'' or he mentions his ex's (which he has a LOT of). Like i dont even wanna know what his sex number is because it would make me feel crap. Its not really the sex that bothers me, but the fact hes had about 10 relationships and I just feel like Im going to be another girl whose virginity he takes and then means nothing to him.I really like him and Ive spoken about this with him and he keeps telling me how important I am to him and he feels differently about me, but it feels like he probably said the same thing to the hundreds of other girls before. How do I get over this stupid insecurity? Every time he brings his ex's up or his sexual encounters it just makes me feel really crap.
    The responses on here have been shocking. In reality people often stay with cheating or even abusive partners, on here they advise people dump others for the slightest error. Don't let them ruin your image of this guy you clearly like. There's massive hostility on here towards anyone who likes a bit of casual sex- we're all immoral *******s who are incapable of monogamy.He probably has no clue this is upsetting you. I told my girlfriend early on she was the prettiest girl I'd shagged. Probably a bad thing to say, but I was honestly trying to make her feel secure! There's no reason to think he's just exploiting you, in fact his behaviour suggests the opposite. The security often just comes with time, trust builds.
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    I think he's lying about all these relationships lol. He seems like a nice guy, so if you wanna lose your V card to him, go for it. Then you wouldn't be so inexperienced :b


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