People always tease me because I'm shy and don't talk much:(

Watch this thread
This discussion is closed.
UndercoverLover
Badges: 0
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#1
Report Thread starter 9 years ago
#1
I don't have any clue why people are always teasing me. I don't talk very much because I'm very shy, and pretty quiet in general. When I talk to others I don't make fun of them, I'm very nice to them even if they might be someone who isn't very nice. I have friends, I'm not any where near popular but I do have people I talk to. I don't understand why people make fun of me

I have no clue why people show so much disrespect towards me when I'm actually very nice to them.
I don't have enough courage to speak for myself, and often leave a blank expression after being teased. I feel so lonely; it leaves me stressed thinking how being teased isn't my fault and I don't deserve it.
Why are these people teasing me? I never show any disrespect to them and treat them very kindly.

Why Do people like teasing shy people?
0
aranexus
Badges: 12
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#2
Report 9 years ago
#2
Because they're an easy target! :diep::ff2::lockstock::playball::starwars:
1
chelseafan
Badges: 21
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#3
Report 9 years ago
#3
I'm sorry but its because your'e an easy target.
0
RemiMarcelle
Badges: 17
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#4
Report 9 years ago
#4
They want to make you feel even smaller than you already are, because they can't understand why you are quiet, as they are always confident and loud.

You are an easy 'target' just try to gain more confidence.

Posted from TSR Mobile
0
feathered-soul
Badges: 9
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#5
Report 9 years ago
#5
I'm afraid it is what the other posters said. You're an easy target for people who need to make themselves feel important. Also the language you use in your post makes sound, mmmm, innocent(?) (not sure if that's totally the right word), which could also make you a bit of a target to.

Could you take drama classes or a team sport like netball? They'd at least help you project your voice so you don't sound as shy as you might feel. The phrase "fake it till you make it" holds true in many cases.
1
UndercoverLover
Badges: 0
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#6
Report Thread starter 9 years ago
#6
(Original post by feathered-soul)
I'm afraid it is what the other posters said. You're an easy target for people who need to make themselves feel important. Also the language you use in your post makes sound, mmmm, innocent(?) (not sure if that's totally the right word), which could also make you a bit of a target to.

Could you take drama classes or a team sport like netball? They'd at least help you project your voice so you don't sound as shy as you might feel. The phrase "fake it till you make it" holds true in many cases.
One of the reasons I don't talk much is because I think I have a off putting voice, when I do speak I get so nervous I start to stutter and you can see me shaking at times.
0
MacLean
Badges: 0
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#7
Report 9 years ago
#7
Hey, dont get too discouraged!

There are a huge number of people out there that require someone else to suffer for them to get some kinda kick/pleasure, and they often work in packs with a hierarchy as well.

But there's a huge number of just plain friendly good people out there too.

You will need to work on it! One thing that won't change is other people in general. So the best option for you to feel better is to work on yourself.

You need to work on it in small little steps: start out doing something social you would normally be too shy to do like - e.g. sometimes you may have a question in your head but it doesn't come out because of shyness - try just forcing it out anyway and push through the anxiety. If thats too much then maybe even something as simple as asking directions off someone or even phoning up to ask about bank/insurance/mobile phone etc.

The important thing is that you make pushing through the anxiety just like going the gym, do it as often as possible. Everytime you find yourself holding back due to anxiety, try to just push through it that little bit further than you are comfortable with.

If you keep working, your comfort level will rise, and what you used to find terrifying will seem trivial. Its upto you how far you want to go with it!

Also to deveolp a thicker skin, try to really start accepting who and what you are including the imperfections. Once you have accepted yourself on deep level, and know your own strengths and weeknesses, digs/taunts just bounce off you like you have a forcefield around you.

Wishing you all the best!
6
JamesNeedHelp2
Badges: 5
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#8
Report 9 years ago
#8
(Original post by UndercoverLover)
I don't have any clue why people are always teasing me. I don't talk very much because I'm very shy, and pretty quiet in general. When I talk to others I don't make fun of them, I'm very nice to them even if they might be someone who isn't very nice. I have friends, I'm not any where near popular but I do have people I talk to. I don't understand why people make fun of me

I have no clue why people show so much disrespect towards me when I'm actually very nice to them.
I don't have enough courage to speak for myself, and often leave a blank expression after being teased. I feel so lonely; it leaves me stressed thinking how being teased isn't my fault and I don't deserve it.
Why are these people teasing me? I never show any disrespect to them and treat them very kindly.

Why Do people like teasing shy people?
All you have to do is muster the confidence to make them look simplistic. Also, dont be kind to malicious people- its a form of weakness and clearly they dont deserve it.
0
Truflais
Badges: 20
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#9
Report 9 years ago
#9
As someone said, they view you as an easy target. Sometimes people will tease you lightly to perhaps bring you out of your shell. However if they're being malicious then it isn't nice or acceptable. You should have the courage to speak up for yourself, I can be fairly shy every now and then but if someone is being rude to you then tell them where to stick it. N'aw mean?
0
sund1ata
Badges: 7
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#10
Report 9 years ago
#10
You are doing almost everything right! The first thing is self-evident: you are wonderful. Don't question that; don't change that. You do require a few adjustments. You're lacking courage, and you need to get it. Unfortunately, they don't sell it at Tesco so you must develop it. I think you have low self-esteem issues that you are masking as "shyness". It can be changed - take up a sport or martial art or as somebody else said, a drama class. You'll develop the social skills to give these losers you are kind to short shrift.


This was posted from The Student Room's iPhone/iPad App
1
Another
Badges: 21
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#11
Report 9 years ago
#11
Next time someone teases you, glare at them in a really cold and angry manner. Just eminate the aura that you are downright pissed at them, promise you they won't do it again. Ever.

If you catch someone talking down on you/patronising you, reverse the tables. Remind them that you're not just a teenage kid.

Sometimes people mistake being quiet, reserved and polite for being shy; and it's annoying as hell. If you feel like you're not getting the respect you deserve, say something about it.
0
Voighty
Badges: 0
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#12
Report 9 years ago
#12
Don't listen to the above comment. Basically, you're being teased because shy people come across as unfriendly and stuck up. So just be more talkative, if not crack a smile every now and then.


Posted from TSR Mobile
1
Cakefan
Badges: 0
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#13
Report 9 years ago
#13
Hey,

I am a pretty chatty extroverted person who likes to joke with my friends. I know that sometimes I get carried away and take things to far. I honestly never indeed to make anyone feel small or silly and I wonder if some of your friends are the same. It is possible that they don't realise that what they see as friendly teasing is in fact making you feel bad. I'm not saying this is definitely the case but it's possible. I know that because I don't mind being the centre of attention I sometimes forget other people do and genuinely I am grateful when poeple let me know I am upsetting them. I would never want to make anyone feel bad and letting me know when I do something wrong helps me to stop it. Would it be possible for you to quietly chat to one of these people and let them know how you feel? Maybe they're just oblivious?

Finally, I would like to say I am really sorry that you are feeling so lonely right now. I hope you find a way of resolving this. Maybe you could try and find a few friends who are quieter as well? I hope things pick up for you
1
Cakefan
Badges: 0
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#14
Report 9 years ago
#14
Also, there seem to be a lot of people suggesting that this is your fault because you are shy. I strongly disagree. We all have different personalities, some people like to chat, some poeple like to listen. Everyone is valuable.
2
oh_life
Badges: 5
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#15
Report 9 years ago
#15
Hey :-)
I am also really quite shy and everytime I speak to someone it is almost as if I'm really apolegetic that I'm looking for people to listen to me, which is so silly!
However, recently I have found my confidence has started to go up, because I've forced myself to speak to a new person every day. I've only been doing it for about a month now. It's so difficult at first, but all you need to say is "hi" and smile at someone, and remember that if someone laughs/teases you/ignores you it is THEIR problem and NOT YOURS because you are making an effort. I am still quite shy and by no means popular, but I now have a lot more friends or people who say hello to me and most of the teasing has stopped- there is always going to be someone who wants to bring you down, whether you are quiet or outgoing.
Good luck! You seem like a really nice person so I really hope that all of the teasing stops because it is so horrible and it makes you become even more introverted. :-( And never push yourself too far or change your personality because it is more important that you feel comfortable!
2
Ezekiella
Badges: 3
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#16
Report 9 years ago
#16
(1) Find yourself some proper friends you know you can trust. Put yourself out there.

(2) If someone tries to put you down because of their own insecurities, deal with it every single time. Anyone can be bigger than a bully - if they weren't so pathetically insecure they wouldn't try to bully you in the first place. You can twist that to your advantage.

(3) ????

(4) Profit
1
Morzor
Badges: 8
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#17
Report 9 years ago
#17
It could be worse, you could be the overbearing, horribly loud, lets-make-a-joke-out-of-everything-until-you-laugh type of person.

Nobody likes that person..
0
CodeJack
Badges: 19
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#18
Report 9 years ago
#18
(Original post by UndercoverLover)
One of the reasons I don't talk much is because I think I have a off putting voice, when I do speak I get so nervous I start to stutter and you can see me shaking at times.
Come talk to me then
0
sausageez
Badges: 10
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#19
Report 9 years ago
#19
maybe they're just trying to bring you out of your shell, not everyone who teases you have malicious intent, just say something witty back or just smile to let them know that it doesn't phase you
0
UndercoverLover
Badges: 0
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#20
Report Thread starter 9 years ago
#20
(Original post by Another)
Next time someone teases you, glare at them in a really cold and angry manner. Just eminate the aura that you are downright pissed at them, promise you they won't do it again. Ever.

If you catch someone talking down on you/patronising you, reverse the tables. Remind them that you're not just a teenage kid.

Sometimes people mistake being quiet, reserved and polite for being shy; and it's annoying as hell. If you feel like you're not getting the respect you deserve, say something about it.
I tried that once and it worked

But I think it's mainly because I'm alone most of the time which makes me an easy target and they seem to gang up on me.
0
X
new posts
Back
to top
Latest
My Feed

See more of what you like on
The Student Room

You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

Personalise

Have you done work experience at school/college?

Yes (154)
41.73%
Not yet, but I will soon (68)
18.43%
No (147)
39.84%

Watched Threads

View All