Depressed beyond belief at Edinburgh University

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shades1984
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I'm coming to the end of 1st year at Edinburgh University and I am so depressed I am starting to totally withdraw. I feel physically sick when I enter the library and have to leave after only a couple of hours. To think I have to spend another three years in this hell-pit is horrifying. Second by second I feel like a part of my heart is dying and there's nothing I can do to stop it. I'm quite sociable and friendly which is why it is ridiculous that I'm so depressed. Sometimes I think to myself, that if I fall in love, maybe this depression will leave me. This university is so cold and heartless and I see many others who looked really depressed.
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Mrfixit
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University did this to me too, it just wasn't my crowd, fake people and people who I didn't really connect with, hated the experience, would have been better off doing an apprenticeship ow something else.
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user5211
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I am also suffering from depression at Edinburgh University. Enjoyed first year relatively but spiralled out of control in the second. When I finally plucked up the courage to tell someone, my flatmates seemed mildly interested, and barely concerned. When I tried to talk about it the following summer, all I got was 'surely you're feeling better by now..'

The University counselling service is limited, and no matter what happens you only receive 6 sessions. I still remember bursting into tears at the end of my last one. To make matters worse, it is located in the middle of the library which makes it almost impossible to attend sessions anonymously.

I am now more than halfway through my fourth year and, although the last few months have been bearable, I am starting to slide again, and dreading what the next year holds for me.

I hope you have made progress in fighting it.
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Copperknickers
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(Original post by shades1984)
I'm coming to the end of 1st year at Edinburgh University and I am so depressed I am starting to totally withdraw. I feel physically sick when I enter the library and have to leave after only a couple of hours. To think I have to spend another three years in this hell-pit is horrifying. Second by second I feel like a part of my heart is dying and there's nothing I can do to stop it. I'm quite sociable and friendly which is why it is ridiculous that I'm so depressed. Sometimes I think to myself, that if I fall in love, maybe this depression will leave me. This university is so cold and heartless and I see many others who looked really depressed.
In what way is it cold and heartless? At the end of the day, anywhere in the world can seem cold and heartless if you aren't settling into it. Have you tried counselling? If you don't like the library, try studying somewhere else. What is it exactly that is troubling you though?
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shades1984
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Hi user5211,

I'm in 2nd year now and still feel a bit off from time to time. Please pay no attention to the next users comments which are unhelpful for the topic we are discussing. I didn't bother with counselling because if ed Uni organised it then it would probably make me feel worse! Sounds like you have crappy flatmates but hold tight! Things will get better...just think about when you get to graduate and leave!!

The set up at ed Uni is toxic I think. It's too big, too many unknown people and if you end up in a flat with people that can barely say hi then it's a downward spiral, one which so many people experience.

I get really depressed during essay and exam times as the loneliness gets to me and then I start to feel quite ill until that's all over : (

All the best user5211!!



(Original post by user5211)
I am also suffering from depression at Edinburgh University. Enjoyed first year relatively but spiralled out of control in the second. When I finally plucked up the courage to tell someone, my flatmates seemed mildly interested, and barely concerned. When I tried to talk about it the following summer, all I got was 'surely you're feeling better by now..'

The University counselling service is limited, and no matter what happens you only receive 6 sessions. I still remember bursting into tears at the end of my last one. To make matters worse, it is located in the middle of the library which makes it almost impossible to attend sessions anonymously.

I am now more than halfway through my fourth year and, although the last few months have been bearable, I am starting to slide again, and dreading what the next year holds for me.

I hope you have made progress in fighting it.
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redferry
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(Original post by shades1984)
I'm coming to the end of 1st year at Edinburgh University and I am so depressed I am starting to totally withdraw. I feel physically sick when I enter the library and have to leave after only a couple of hours. To think I have to spend another three years in this hell-pit is horrifying. Second by second I feel like a part of my heart is dying and there's nothing I can do to stop it. I'm quite sociable and friendly which is why it is ridiculous that I'm so depressed. Sometimes I think to myself, that if I fall in love, maybe this depression will leave me. This university is so cold and heartless and I see many others who looked really depressed.
I was really depressed through my first year of uni but things did get better. You need to focus on yourself, make friends, stay social and excercise. Avoid drinking on your own. Get to a councilling service.

And above all don't believe that a relationship is the answer , chasing the opposite sex only makes things worse.
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redferry
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(Original post by user5211)
I am also suffering from depression at Edinburgh University. Enjoyed first year relatively but spiralled out of control in the second. When I finally plucked up the courage to tell someone, my flatmates seemed mildly interested, and barely concerned. When I tried to talk about it the following summer, all I got was 'surely you're feeling better by now..'

The University counselling service is limited, and no matter what happens you only receive 6 sessions. I still remember bursting into tears at the end of my last one. To make matters worse, it is located in the middle of the library which makes it almost impossible to attend sessions anonymously.

I am now more than halfway through my fourth year and, although the last few months have been bearable, I am starting to slide again, and dreading what the next year holds for me.

I hope you have made progress in fighting it.
Approach the bus for councilling outside university if it isn't working for you. I was similar to you in my first year of Bristol. Stay social and find some better friends.

Don't give up on your course! Otherwise it's much harder to move on afterwards!
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Old_Simon
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I really would urge people experiencing these types of feelings to forget counselling and see a proper doctor. Modern medications can be fantastic. Please do not continue to suffer.
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LeicsChick
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(Original post by Old_Simon)
I really would urge people experiencing these types of feelings to forget counselling and see a proper doctor. Modern medications can be fantastic. Please do not continue to suffer.
Medication can't always change the problem though. In my experience I chose counselling just because I needed to change the problem, not mask it for a while. Worth a try surely?
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Old_Simon
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(Original post by LeicsChick)
Medication can't always change the problem though. In my experience I chose counselling just because I needed to change the problem, not mask it for a while. Worth a try surely?

Medication can give you relief and a breathing space to let your counselling work. You have no need to go on enduring your life like this. Your doctor can really help.
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jonathanemptage
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have you considered leaving and going elsewhere I went to portsmouth and felt the same despite comeing home at weekends I dreaded sunday nights when I would have to return and the smallest thing used to make me cry (even dropping s tea spoon) I left after christmas and went to a diffrent uni the next year where I was much happyer

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frida415
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I'm a second year at ed uni too and i feel the same way. i really don't like the people here and i feel really alienated from them. I can't go to the library either because I get too overwhelmed. I'm not that sociable though so it makes sense im having a hard time, i was surprised that even people who are friendly and sociable can be having the same problems. what is it that's making you depressed do u think? i was thinking of leaving and going to a smaller/less pretentious uni like oxford brookes...
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shades1984
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Edinburgh university makes me depressed because you never get to know anyone from the lectures. So many of the students are very wealthy. I just have little in common with these types. I have no idea how this Uni got a world famous reputation but I can barely get more than half a sentence from a lecturer that I just stopped asking questions and I rarely send an email. I am though a very sociable person but it's just ed Uni which is faulty in its set- up, it's too big....it's just too bloody big! This year I have not spent more than five minutes in the library! I have failed to connect with ed Uni and the people and although I have another two years to go I will stick with it. I'm 29 so I know life isn't a cake walk but I do feel annoyed that I have not found similar like minded people to socialise with. I can feel the waves of depression roll over me at the moment but I'm just praying for the summer holidays. What course are you studying?
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Anonymous #1
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Why do you's all feel so isolated, do you think? Edinburgh university is one of my options but if it's really this horrible I don't think I'll go. I'm quite shy and had trouble fitting in at school, so I'd probably have it worse if it's difficult to connect with people here.

Could one of you's give me specifics, if you don't mind, about why you don't like the university, why it's difficult to make friends, etc, so I have a clearer picture of whether or not I should go here? I'd be moving away from home, so I'd be completely on my own. Do you's wish you's had went to a different university from the very beginning?

Basically, would you advise me to avoid Edinburgh altogether, since I have other offers? Thanks to anyone who replies, it would really help me out a lot :-) xxx
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shades1984
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I think you have to go to Pollock to make friends in first year, that's what everyone says. You will make few friends from lectures or tutorials where you'll find most people are incapable of even saying hello. I'm 29 and live at home so I missed that and if you're a guy it's worse because there are far more girls to boys ratio.

The worst thing about the university is it's size, it's far too big and there are 30,000 students which means that you never really get to know the place. I was born in Edinburgh and that is what struck me as being so peculiar about the university, it feels so alienated from the rest of the easy to know city.

The teaching is not world class and student satisfaction is rock bottom in many of the league tables. This is for a reason, all of your essay feedback for 1st and 2nd year is given by inexperienced PHD students with almost no real teaching experience or ability. They give you one or two sentences of feedback once a semester which makes me feel as if I've just wasted two years of my life as I've now finished second year. There is no exam feedback. I repeat and I am not making this up = there is no exam feedback.

The one good thing about the university is that if you can stick it out and it is possible, the whole world will believe you have a degree from one of the best universities on Earth and that is worth something. That is the pay-off but there is a reason why student counselling sessions are fully booked, the level of detachment, academic stress with virtually no support makes people very ill physically and psychologically.

Go to Glasgow or St Andrews if you can. They all do much better than Edinburgh in league tables. Can you resist the prestige of Edinburgh though lol?

If you do come to Edinburgh, please reply to this thread in a year and let me know what your experience was like etc!!
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pinkbullets
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I went to the post applicant open day at Edinburgh university a few years ago and I remember getting a really strange vibe from it. It was really weird because I've always loved Edinburgh as a city but I came away knowing that there was no way I was going there. I cannot believe that you get no exam feedback and such rubbish essay feedback . Anyway, I hope it gets better for you guys.
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Fabiosso
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i don't think the university is the the main problem, i think is Edinburgh itself, the weather is always cold and grey, people no sense of humor, and it's proven that the weather does affect people's character, if you where somewhere sunny and warm, believe me you wouldn't feel as depressed like you are,i lived in Edinburgh for a while and i got a depression,no where to go in your day off,apart from the main street in town, you see the same decor over and over again,lack of indoors places where you can sit and enjoy yourself, shopping centers too small and for a capital i think is too far far behind London,
food wise i don't understand the taste of the people, strange food and gastronomy,people are getting taught on TV how to eat 5 a day, i felt like i am in another planet,very hard to socialize with locals the only thing they know pub and lager,there is nice people well traveled they understand what you talking about, and i had to leave Edinburgh, since then i feel GREAT believe me,
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Anonymous #2
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I'm a computer science student at edinburgh university and i feel the same. We get barely any support, no exam feedback and lecturers who don't give a monkey about teaching properly. One of them hates it so much he can't stand to lecture more than for half an hour (we're supposed to have hour long lecturers).Ii couldn't connect with anyone in my computer science year group, all my friends are from the people i met on outside courses. I wish i went to glasgow :\
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Anonymous #3
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I'm a Computer Science student here as well, and I honestly hate it so much. I don't think it's the university's fault, it's just that the work is so damn hard. First year was fine for me, but as soon as second year hit, I was a total wreck. There is so much coursework, the weekly reading probably hits about 100 pages of raw text/dense mathematics and the exam questions really test your wisdom in the material.

For anybody reading this who is considering coming here, only come here if you're really passionate about the subject and extremely intelligent, trust me, I would guess you need an IQ of at least 115 if you're studying Computer Science here. You cannot get by on sheer determination and hard work, you need a natural talent for mathematics and problem solving. This is real computer science.

An easy way of knowing whether computer science at Edinburgh is suitable for you is to ask yourself these questions - "Do you solve maths problems in your spare time?", "Are you intrigued by natural mathematical phenomena?", "Are you a creative thinker who can work their way through a difficult problem?", "When you are stuck on a hard problem, are you driven to find the answer or do you just not care and get frustrated?", "Are you mentally sharp and quick?".

I fit none of the criteria above, but my classmates certainly do. Choose your degree for the passion in the subject, not for the graduate prospects and money. I'm afraid I made that mistake.
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evabrook
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Hi, i'm in my first year at King's College in London and I feel the same as you.

I'm seriously considering leaving to go to Leeds University as I have found that I haven't met anyone like me, a lot of people come across as insincere (on top of it being so expensive!)

I'd say if it's making you that distressed, then please come out of the Uni, for your own wellbeing.
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