Descriptive Essay IGCSE English First Language Watch

Licialoves
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Hey guys, I'll be taking English as a First Language for IGCSE this year and I'm hoping to get an A*. I want to know if I should write argumentative, descriptive or narrative for the composition part.

Somehow my teacher keeps persuading us to write descriptive, but I personally don't think I'm good at descriptive considering the limited time given during exams. She says its easier to score in descriptive than argumentative. Is this true? :confused:

Anyway, I tried writing a descriptive essay, do you guys think this would be good enough to get an A*? Your feedbacks will be much appreciated

Descriptive Writing
You arrive on an island. Write a description of your first impressions of the place and its people.

As I placed one foot out from my wooden boat, and the next foot out, my feet decided to plant itself into the sand. My eyes felt like it didn’t know how to blink at that moment as I was awe-struck by what my eyes witnessed. In front of me was a place filled with the unending grains of golden sand, as if the whole island was made out of gold itself. Shimmering blue waters that sparkled in the presence of the sunlight encircled the island. Greenery spread out all around the island, with patches of different coloured flowers that grew among bushes occasionally. In a distant, was a majestic waterfall that looked like a sheet of blue velour swishing down, its edges hemmed with whipped-white lines. The water thundered down into the pool like a gigantic waterspout.

Just as I arrived, it so happened the sky began to glow as the flaming orb rose from the horizon and ignited the sky, causing it to burst into a bright, passionate mix of scarlet and yellow. The clouds had no place in the morning sky as the majestic sun reigned supreme. The colours of the sky blended perfectly with the colours of the scenery. Its ineffable beauty was like a masterpiece painted by Picasso that came to life, lying right in front of my eyes.

As I was finally able to take control of my body, I walked towards the island, with my feet brushing against the silky, smooth sand. The feeling of the sand in between my toes reminded me of my childhood where I spent a reasonable amount of time at the beach. The stream of dark, glossy waves falling over my shoulder swayed to one side as the gentle breeze blew. Palm trees swayed with synchronisation, as if it was choreographed dance.
I rested my eyelids and instantly, my ears could pick up the unnoticeable sounds of nature. An orchestra of birds chirped harmoniously to a melody that soothed the ears of a person, the leaves rustled softly in the breeze as they fell and fluttered like snowflakes. The calming, repetitive sounds of the lapping waves came together in gently, a hypnotic melody, casting a spell of serene tranquillity over the mesmerizing scene.

From a distant, I heard the sounds of words being said, though I could not make out what the words were. I started to regain my sight as my eyelids gradually lifted. Tiny figures from afar were nearing towards my direction. There were humans living in this place that seemed like a dreamed paradise, how fortunate for them to live in such a place, I whispered to myself. I jogged lightly towards them, eager to meet them.

Finally, we were close enough to communicate with each other as we shook hands and introduced each other. The smiles and excitement on their faces were welcoming and inviting, as if they had known me for ages. As they spoke, they were filled with energy and liveliness, their personalities made one feel like a part of their family. Their characters fitted perfectly with the view of this paradise island, a place where the world seemed flawless, a world where there’s the insignificance of money and fame. After my personal encounter with this place, I finally believed there was a heaven on earth.
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halzmac
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(Original post by Licialoves)
Hey guys, I'll be taking English as a First Language for IGCSE this year and I'm hoping to get an A*. I want to know if I should write argumentative, descriptive or narrative for the composition part.

Somehow my teacher keeps persuading us to write descriptive, but I personally don't think I'm good at descriptive considering the limited time given during exams. She says its easier to score in descriptive than argumentative. Is this true? :confused:

Anyway, I tried writing a descriptive essay, do you guys think this would be good enough to get an A*? Your feedbacks will be much appreciated

Descriptive Writing
You arrive on an island. Write a description of your first impressions of the place and its people.

As I placed one foot out from my wooden boat, and the next foot out, my feet decided to plant itself into the sand. My eyes felt like it didn’t know how to blink at that moment as I was awe-struck by what my eyes witnessed. In front of me was a place filled with the unending grains of golden sand, as if the whole island was made out of gold itself. Shimmering blue waters that sparkled in the presence of the sunlight encircled the island. Greenery spread out all around the island, with patches of different coloured flowers that grew among bushes occasionally. In a distant, was a majestic waterfall that looked like a sheet of blue velour swishing down, its edges hemmed with whipped-white lines. The water thundered down into the pool like a gigantic waterspout.

Just as I arrived, it so happened the sky began to glow as the flaming orb rose from the horizon and ignited the sky, causing it to burst into a bright, passionate mix of scarlet and yellow. The clouds had no place in the morning sky as the majestic sun reigned supreme. The colours of the sky blended perfectly with the colours of the scenery. Its ineffable beauty was like a masterpiece painted by Picasso that came to life, lying right in front of my eyes.

As I was finally able to take control of my body, I walked towards the island, with my feet brushing against the silky, smooth sand. The feeling of the sand in between my toes reminded me of my childhood where I spent a reasonable amount of time at the beach. The stream of dark, glossy waves falling over my shoulder swayed to one side as the gentle breeze blew. Palm trees swayed with synchronisation, as if it was choreographed dance.
I rested my eyelids and instantly, my ears could pick up the unnoticeable sounds of nature. An orchestra of birds chirped harmoniously to a melody that soothed the ears of a person, the leaves rustled softly in the breeze as they fell and fluttered like snowflakes. The calming, repetitive sounds of the lapping waves came together in gently, a hypnotic melody, casting a spell of serene tranquillity over the mesmerizing scene.

From a distant, I heard the sounds of words being said, though I could not make out what the words were. I started to regain my sight as my eyelids gradually lifted. Tiny figures from afar were nearing towards my direction. There were humans living in this place that seemed like a dreamed paradise, how fortunate for them to live in such a place, I whispered to myself. I jogged lightly towards them, eager to meet them.

Finally, we were close enough to communicate with each other as we shook hands and introduced each other. The smiles and excitement on their faces were welcoming and inviting, as if they had known me for ages. As they spoke, they were filled with energy and liveliness, their personalities made one feel like a part of their family. Their characters fitted perfectly with the view of this paradise island, a place where the world seemed flawless, a world where there’s the insignificance of money and fame. After my personal encounter with this place, I finally believed there was a heaven on earth.
I think that is for sure an A*!
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AmmarahSanna
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That is a really good piece of descriptive writing..
I think it is A* worth!
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person1472
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wow, I have the exam tomorrow and was looking for some exemplars. I think I found one. This is really good.
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Victor Nikhil
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Actually this doesn't make sense you would probably not appreciate the seeing water after being coming to island of a small boat which probably means that you were stranded on water .
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artymaniac
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(Original post by Licialoves)
Hey guys, I'll be taking English as a First Language for IGCSE this year and I'm hoping to get an A*. I want to know if I should write argumentative, descriptive or narrative for the composition part.

Somehow my teacher keeps persuading us to write descriptive, but I personally don't think I'm good at descriptive considering the limited time given during exams. She says its easier to score in descriptive than argumentative. Is this true? :confused:

Anyway, I tried writing a descriptive essay, do you guys think this would be good enough to get an A*? Your feedbacks will be much appreciated

Descriptive Writing
You arrive on an island. Write a description of your first impressions of the place and its people.

As I placed one foot out from my wooden boat, and the next foot out, my feet decided to plant itself into the sand. My eyes felt like it didn’t know how to blink at that moment as I was awe-struck by what my eyes witnessed. In front of me was a place filled with the unending grains of golden sand, as if the whole island was made out of gold itself. Shimmering blue waters that sparkled in the presence of the sunlight encircled the island. Greenery spread out all around the island, with patches of different coloured flowers that grew among bushes occasionally. In a distant, was a majestic waterfall that looked like a sheet of blue velour swishing down, its edges hemmed with whipped-white lines. The water thundered down into the pool like a gigantic waterspout.

Just as I arrived, it so happened the sky began to glow as the flaming orb rose from the horizon and ignited the sky, causing it to burst into a bright, passionate mix of scarlet and yellow. The clouds had no place in the morning sky as the majestic sun reigned supreme. The colours of the sky blended perfectly with the colours of the scenery. Its ineffable beauty was like a masterpiece painted by Picasso that came to life, lying right in front of my eyes.

As I was finally able to take control of my body, I walked towards the island, with my feet brushing against the silky, smooth sand. The feeling of the sand in between my toes reminded me of my childhood where I spent a reasonable amount of time at the beach. The stream of dark, glossy waves falling over my shoulder swayed to one side as the gentle breeze blew. Palm trees swayed with synchronisation, as if it was choreographed dance.
I rested my eyelids and instantly, my ears could pick up the unnoticeable sounds of nature. An orchestra of birds chirped harmoniously to a melody that soothed the ears of a person, the leaves rustled softly in the breeze as they fell and fluttered like snowflakes. The calming, repetitive sounds of the lapping waves came together in gently, a hypnotic melody, casting a spell of serene tranquillity over the mesmerizing scene.

From a distant, I heard the sounds of words being said, though I could not make out what the words were. I started to regain my sight as my eyelids gradually lifted. Tiny figures from afar were nearing towards my direction. There were humans living in this place that seemed like a dreamed paradise, how fortunate for them to live in such a place, I whispered to myself. I jogged lightly towards them, eager to meet them.

Finally, we were close enough to communicate with each other as we shook hands and introduced each other. The smiles and excitement on their faces were welcoming and inviting, as if they had known me for ages. As they spoke, they were filled with energy and liveliness, their personalities made one feel like a part of their family. Their characters fitted perfectly with the view of this paradise island, a place where the world seemed flawless, a world where there’s the insignificance of money and fame. After my personal encounter with this place, I finally believed there was a heaven on earth.
This is fantastic definitely A* worthy well done!!
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bubblypop
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thank you so much for your hard work. I am very grateful. This would be worth an A* for sure!Thanks again
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bubblypop
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Victor stop acting like a show-off and appreciate the hard work somebody has done!
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LucindaJones
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That is excellent! Stick with descriptive because that will definitely get you an A*, potentially even full marks.
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sayiliyay
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Can I use your descriptive writing for my essay at dchool I do gcse, and I need a very good descriptive writing to get a grade A*. It, s so good.
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sayiliyay
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(Original post by LucindaJones)
That is excellent! Stick with descriptive because that will definitely get you an A*, potentially even full marks.
(Original post by artymaniac)
This is fantastic definitely A* worthy well done!!
(Original post by Licialoves)
Hey guys, I'll be taking English as a First Language for IGCSE this year and I'm hoping to get an A*. I want to know if I should write argumentative, descriptive or narrative for the composition part.

Somehow my teacher keeps persuading us to write descriptive, but I personally don't think I'm good at descriptive considering the limited time given during exams. She says its easier to score in descriptive than argumentative. Is this true? :confused:

Anyway, I tried writing a descriptive essay, do you guys think this would be good enough to get an A*? Your feedbacks will be much appreciated

Descriptive Writing
You arrive on an island. Write a description of your first impressions of the place and its people.

As I placed one foot out from my wooden boat, and the next foot out, my feet decided to plant itself into the sand. My eyes felt like it didn’t know how to blink at that moment as I was awe-struck by what my eyes witnessed. In front of me was a place filled with the unending grains of golden sand, as if the whole island was made out of gold itself. Shimmering blue waters that sparkled in the presence of the sunlight encircled the island. Greenery spread out all around the island, with patches of different coloured flowers that grew among bushes occasionally. In a distant, was a majestic waterfall that looked like a sheet of blue velour swishing down, its edges hemmed with whipped-white lines. The water thundered down into the pool like a gigantic waterspout.

Just as I arrived, it so happened the sky began to glow as the flaming orb rose from the horizon and ignited the sky, causing it to burst into a bright, passionate mix of scarlet and yellow. The clouds had no place in the morning sky as the majestic sun reigned supreme. The colours of the sky blended perfectly with the colours of the scenery. Its ineffable beauty was like a masterpiece painted by Picasso that came to life, lying right in front of my eyes.

As I was finally able to take control of my body, I walked towards the island, with my feet brushing against the silky, smooth sand. The feeling of the sand in between my toes reminded me of my childhood where I spent a reasonable amount of time at the beach. The stream of dark, glossy waves falling over my shoulder swayed to one side as the gentle breeze blew. Palm trees swayed with synchronisation, as if it was choreographed dance.
I rested my eyelids and instantly, my ears could pick up the unnoticeable sounds of nature. An orchestra of birds chirped harmoniously to a melody that soothed the ears of a person, the leaves rustled softly in the breeze as they fell and fluttered like snowflakes. The calming, repetitive sounds of the lapping waves came together in gently, a hypnotic melody, casting a spell of serene tranquillity over the mesmerizing scene.

From a distant, I heard the sounds of words being said, though I could not make out what the words were. I started to regain my sight as my eyelids gradually lifted. Tiny figures from afar were nearing towards my direction. There were humans living in this place that seemed like a dreamed paradise, how fortunate for them to live in such a place, I whispered to myself. I jogged lightly towards them, eager to meet them.

Finally, we were close enough to communicate with each other as we shook hands and introduced each other. The smiles and excitement on their faces were welcoming and inviting, as if they had known me for ages. As they spoke, they were filled with energy and liveliness, their personalities made one feel like a part of their family. Their characters fitted perfectly with the view of this paradise island, a place where the world seemed flawless, a world where there’s the insignificance of money and fame. After my personal encounter with this place, I finally believed there was a heaven on earth.
Really good fantastic
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Gfdddcvghhhhjjj
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This is crap not original,engaging or interesting as one of the country's leading examiners I would give this a solid b
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Blue_PandaxD
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AMAZING! Defiantly an A* I Have Never Read Anything Like It.
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abu1342+1234
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this is AMAZING!!!
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Didjsnd
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B/C at best
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ssamiha
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I don't understand how can some of guys comment so rude on this beautiful piece of writing.
I would have definitely give an A* for that.
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keyboard_warrior
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Not going to lie it is not A* worth. Quite a lot of the English is clumsy like "My eyes felt like it didn’t know how to blink, " and some of the descriptions just don't make sense "I rested my eyelids and instantly, my ears could pick up the unnoticeable sounds of nature," hmmmm unnoticeable. i know that this is probably a bit late but this isn't great, don't get cocky.
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rai roxy
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ur essay is outstanding. It's like reading a novel. I love this. I can read this until my eyes hurts
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igcsenewbie
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Can you use 'I' in descriptive writing? - I thought you couldn't use any narrative in descriptive writing. No 'I' or 'me'
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patterns_smiles
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I think that was a nice try but some parts did not make sense and some parts of your work were not descriptive enough, they were cut short. Try to work on that, this would probably get you a C
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