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I am in a dangerously bad place Watch

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    Hi,

    I need advice on what to do.I apologise for any typos in this post. I hvae a long history of severe depression and anxiety. 2 years ago, I went to uni and I met a girl with whom I've been with up till now (I just graduated) It gave me a sense of purpose and security. I do not fall for people easily at all, but , once I do, I am so attached that a break up can be devastating. My gf (now ex) told me 2 days ago that she did not feel the same way and there was nothing I could to do change it.

    I know this sounds like a very common situation to be in, and it is for most. It's the way I am coping that is not quie right. I ahve severe depression and anxiet. Now I have no uni or girlfriend, I have no purpose. I am locked ina cycle of drinking and taking drugs in my room and I have not even eaten since wednesday at all. I cannot muster the wll power to even leave this place. I do not sleep anymore. I just keep drinkig and then knock myself out with as muchketamine as I can. I have no one else in the world to see. Everyting in my life revolved around how I felt for her and where it was going. I donot know what to do, but it is looking as though i am going to end up where i almost did 2 yearsago.

    sorry for the long post. but I feel my body shutting down. I canba rely move anymore.
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    #1

    i want to be with somene, i annot be alone and i need to be outside. i cannot be inside and alone. i live in london
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    #1

    advic please
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    bump
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    hey, sitting at home isnt going to solve any of your problems. the only way you will find someone else is by going out? im crap at advice but since nobody has replied i thought id try and help out
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    First of all, you know what you are doing and you know that you are not going about it the right way. Now, seeing as it's a Sunday, your first step could be to ring the Samaritans. That will give you someone to talk to.

    Tomorrow, make an appointment with your GP and get yourself some help. Do you have a therapist already? If so, see if you can make an urgent appointment with him/her. If not, see if your GP can refer you to one.

    Drugs and alcohol are likely to make your anxiety and depression worse. Plus, they won't solve the problem. The way I deal with anxiety is to distract myself. Play a computer game, tidy up, read a book, put on a movie, anything to take your mind of things for a while that does not involve drugs or alcohol.

    One lesson I have learned in life is that you cannot, ever, allow your happiness and well-being to depend on another person. It's not fair on them, and it's not fair on you, either. It's natural to grieve over the end of a relationship, but don't allow it to destroy you.

    You graduated from Uni, and that is great! Now, your future may or may not involve that girl, but you have things to look forward to. You just have to make some new plans and work towards those. With professional help, perhaps, because those people can assist you in making sense of things.
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    (Original post by Kittiara)
    First of all, you know what you are doing and you know that you are not going about it the right way. Now, seeing as it's a Sunday, your first step could be to ring the Samaritans. That will give you someone to talk to.

    Tomorrow, make an appointment with your GP and get yourself some help. Do you have a therapist already? If so, see if you can make an urgent appointment with him/her. If not, see if your GP can refer you to one.

    Drugs and alcohol are likely to make your anxiety and depression worse. Plus, they won't solve the problem. The way I deal with anxiety is to distract myself. Play a computer game, tidy up, read a book, put on a movie, anything to take your mind of things for a while that does not involve drugs or alcohol.

    One lesson I have learned in life is that you cannot, ever, allow your happiness and well-being to depend on another person. It's not fair on them, and it's not fair on you, either. It's natural to grieve over the end of a relationship, but don't allow it to destroy you.

    You graduated from Uni, and that is great! Now, your future may or may not involve that girl, but you have things to look forward to. You just have to make some new plans and work towards those. With professional help, perhaps, because those people can assist you in making sense of things.
    It's the fact I cannot be alone. If alone, my mind starts racing. I need to be with people all the time. But I know nobody.
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    The girlfriend sounds quite heartless...give me a name and address ill show her depression!!!

    Pm me if you wanna talk...


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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    It's the fact I cannot be alone. If alone, my mind starts racing. I need to be with people all the time. But I know nobody.
    That is why I'd ring the Samaritans. That way you'll have someone to talk with, at least for a while, and they may well have some good advice for you.

    You no doubt have a whole load of feelings to deal with right now, and if you ring them, you can vent. That's what they're there for - to listen.

    If you really feel like you might do something stupid, though, the NHS helpline may be another option.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Hi,

    I need advice on what to do.I apologise for any typos in this post. I hvae a long history of severe depression and anxiety. 2 years ago, I was close to being ending up dead as a result of depression, I went to uni and I met a girl with whom I've been with up till now (I just graduated) It gave me a sense of purpose and security. I do not fall for people easily at all, but , once I do, I am so attached that a break up can be devastating. My gf (now ex) told me 2 days ago that she did not feel the same way and there was nothing I could to do change it.

    I know this sounds like a very common situation to be in, and it is for most. It's the way I am coping that is not quie right. I ahve severe depression and anxiet. Now I have no uni or girlfriend, I have no purpose. I am locked ina cycle of drinking and taking drugs in my room and I have not even eaten since wednesday at all. I cannot muster the wll power to even leave this place. I do not sleep anymore. I just keep drinkig and then knock myself out with as muchketamine as I can. I have no one else in the world to see. Everyting in my life revolved around how I felt for her and where it was going. I donot know what to do, but it is looking as though i am going to end up where i almost did 2 yearsago.

    sorry for the long post. but I feel my body shutting down. I canba rely move anymore.
    Please PM me
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    (Original post by YB101)
    Please PM me
    Surely, you can just your reply here?

    OP - having a girlfriend won't make your depression go away. Have you looked into things like voluntary work to keep yourself busy?
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    You do sound in a dangerously bad place. Drugs/alcohol and depression tend to spiral.

    I don't think normal advice is going to be enough here. I think you need to get in contact with a professional who can help you and also watch over you. Please call samaritans and go to your GP asap (as someone else has said). If you are really concerned for your safety (you are having suicidal thoughts) it isn't wrong to go to A&E.

    You can also talktofrank about drug and alcohol problems you are having and they can give you local help.
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    piglings right, you need some counselling or something like that. didn't you develop any friends during uni, or was your sole purpose just this girl? if i were i would get myself busy and start taking up hobbies, get a job go out to night clubs and parties and try and hit on someone, if you ever get another relationship, try not to fall for them too much as keep reminding yourself that you have ever priorities and important stuff and not just her. heck, you should be thinking that, you're doesn't and will never revolve around that girl or anyone else you meet, you weren't born into this for them. keep tryna live your life mate, you'll meet someone for you eventually and dont forget to keep yourself busy.
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    You are in a dangerously bad place, and the Samaritans is a good place to start talking. You've made it this far to post this. You go to the kitchen and get yourself a large jug of water, pick up your phone and ring them. Then follow the previous advice others have given you.

    You've made it this far. There's light at the end of the tunnel. You've realised there's a problem -- step 1. Good luck and take care.


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    Moved this into the mental health section
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Hi,

    I need advice on what to do.I apologise for any typos in this post. I hvae a long history of severe depression and anxiety. 2 years ago, I was close to being ending up dead as a result of depression, I went to uni and I met a girl with whom I've been with up till now (I just graduated) It gave me a sense of purpose and security. I do not fall for people easily at all, but , once I do, I am so attached that a break up can be devastating. My gf (now ex) told me 2 days ago that she did not feel the same way and there was nothing I could to do change it.

    I know this sounds like a very common situation to be in, and it is for most. It's the way I am coping that is not quie right. I ahve severe depression and anxiet. Now I have no uni or girlfriend, I have no purpose. I am locked ina cycle of drinking and taking drugs in my room and I have not even eaten since wednesday at all. I cannot muster the wll power to even leave this place. I do not sleep anymore. I just keep drinkig and then knock myself out with as muchketamine as I can. I have no one else in the world to see. Everyting in my life revolved around how I felt for her and where it was going. I donot know what to do, but it is looking as though i am going to end up where i almost did 2 yearsago.

    sorry for the long post. but I feel my body shutting down. I canba rely move anymore.

    As others have suggested, Samaritans can offer you help if you give them a call (08457 90 90 90) or if you feel you're in immediate danger you can also phone 999.


    If there's anybody you know who you could ask to stay with you until you can visit a doctor that would be a good idea.

    Sorry to hear about your break up but it's not the end of everything. You can still move on and find other happiness. Be happy for the time you had together and don't look back in anger or regret.

    Good luck and stay strong. We're here for you- you are not alone xx






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    Hey man,

    First thing I would say is there are many of us who have been through your dilemma, and I totally understand how hard it must be for you.

    The reason I say that is because I myself fell in love with a girl, who I can hand on my heart say was possibly the one. And I feel by showing you what I went through you might be able to get some perspective...

    You know when there is electricity, you talk all the time, you can just tell in the girl's eyes there is something. All my friends said the connection was off the chart, the girl was the one who first told me she had feelings for me.
    And for someone like myself who really only has a handful of friends, and not much purpose, it made getting up in the morning worthwhile...

    This was until I found the girl having an affair with her manager at work !!
    (not quite the same as you but in essence she had made her decision)

    For months I was devastated, I cried as I had so many plans with the girl and I introduced her to my friends/family.
    Suddenly the person I'd think about 24/7 was out my life and I found myself experiencing severe loneliness and nothing to look forward to.
    This was a year ago, and I am still struggling too move forward with life.

    But today I saw something which really woke me up and made me realize how lucky I am.
    Literally took a walk, and I saw a father helping and teaching his young child to operate her wheelchair, who suffered quite sadly from multiple disabilities and it broke my heart, simply because he was so enthusastic about teaching his child and she was working so hard to overcome the smallest challenge.
    This lead me to see, that although what you are experiencing is a tough challenge too, in the scheme of things its nothing :/
    I think what I would suggest is just set yourself some goals, just focus on yourself mate. **** the girl. its about you man.
    Maybe there is a sport you like, maybe you are into music, but whatever it is just focus on some key activities that you like and just do them.
    Or maybe you have an ambition or something you want to achieve, you just need to focus on that.

    I totally feel your pain mate, but trust me you will meet someone else, but first thing right now is you just got to keep busy and do stuff that benefits you.
    you may not be able to forget about the girl, thats fine mate, but she turned her back on you, now you turn your back on her and focus all your efforts on yourself.

    I really hope my advice helps, if it doesn't I'm sure the other comments will
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    (Original post by OU Student)
    Surely, you can just your reply here?

    OP - having a girlfriend won't make your depression go away. Have you looked into things like voluntary work to keep yourself busy?
    Sometimes it's easier to talk one on one without everyone else reading. I just want to help the guy out
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    I am so sorry you feel the way you do anon and it sounds like you have a lot to deal with. You've stated that you've be taking ketamine, have you tried antidepressants in the past, maybe think about going to see you GP or a friend or family member that knows you really well. I have you tried using distraction techniques like watching a movie or listening to some music? It sounds like you going through some really drastic mood shifts and you need support to help you get through it. I know it must be scary feeling the way you do but its going to be OK. Just have a think about what you would like to do to help yourself and whats stopping you from doing it. Take little steps, for example have a bath or eat half a sandwich.

    I hope you find some support
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    htnk you to everyone who has been so supportive and trying to help. unfortunate the situation has not got much better. after events of what happened yesterday and how it's going today, i think i should try and go to doctor or hispitsl if i can. i will try to if, as the evening progresses, it turns into like last night.
 
 
 
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