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Mental Health Support Society Mk X
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Original post by bullettheory
Watched Inception with my friend and found it really triggering.
Spoiler
Very very awkward. The most vulnerable i've ever been infront of anyone.
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Sleep deprivation once again... from psychiatrist making me try and come off meds... don't know why she even put me on them she knows I always get bad side effects... said it herself... so now I have the fun of coming off them..
On a positive passed my grade 1 dance this week and starting on 2 now..
apparently the weird states of mind I kept getting including on my last exam are depersonalisation and de-somethingelseIcan'tremember... no idea what any of that is but hey.
been a strange few days like I've been in a daze... accidentally pulled out in front of someone on a roundabout the other day totally nto like me :/ then managed to do it again to the same person in the car park.... no idea wtf is up with me. never ever ever done anything like that before...
trying to occupy myself /distract myself from looming results by preparing for decorating my room... stripped all the wallpaper off... now working on sanding stuff down. zzzzzz...
just want to disappear for a while and not have anything to do with anyone :/
On a positive passed my grade 1 dance this week and starting on 2 now..
apparently the weird states of mind I kept getting including on my last exam are depersonalisation and de-somethingelseIcan'tremember... no idea what any of that is but hey.
been a strange few days like I've been in a daze... accidentally pulled out in front of someone on a roundabout the other day totally nto like me :/ then managed to do it again to the same person in the car park.... no idea wtf is up with me. never ever ever done anything like that before...
trying to occupy myself /distract myself from looming results by preparing for decorating my room... stripped all the wallpaper off... now working on sanding stuff down. zzzzzz...
just want to disappear for a while and not have anything to do with anyone :/
I'm really hoping going for a run is a good idea tonight. It's so warm but I need to go out.
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Spoilered for female stuffs
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Original post by kiss_me_now9
I'm really hoping going for a run is a good idea tonight. It's so warm but I need to go out.
Spoilered for female stuffs
Spoilered for female stuffs
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Feeling really low tonight, so low I'm lying to my boyfriend about how I'm feeling
Triggering stuff potentially
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Triggering stuff potentially
Spoiler
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Original post by PonchoKid
Spoiler
(Also, what is this famous twiddly? I keep hearing people mention them, but I have no frigging clue what they are. Are they fun?)
Psychiatrist apointment is later than I thought it was when I made it. I thought it was the coming week but it's actually the one after. 
I almost want to phone again and ask for a sooner one but I just don't have any time I can call so I guess i'll just wait.
I really want some recognition for all this paranoid-like stuff. I want to know it's okay I guess and give it a name. I like having lables, they help. Doctors tend to think it's bad to give lables though, I know that, I want them to tell me what this is though. Then I know it's the [insert diagnosis] making me think it not me and I can blame it on that.
I'm feeling better than I was last night but still not good. I feel alone maybe. I don't know. I'm really confused at the moment and I want somebody just to stay with me and tell me it's okay and keep an eye one me but I can't ask anyone to do that and it's awkward anyway. I'm so scared of what's happening. It's like i'm going back again but it's sorta worse now cos I take it out on me more. I wan't to just let it all out but I don't want to worry anyone. Only person I can tell is my psyc but I have to wait over a week. I know I can wait and that i'll be okay but it's still going to be hard and I don't want it to be.
Some of my neighbours are having a party or something and I can hear it. I don't mind the noise but hearing them all having fun and laughing is making me feel more lonely. I don't want to worry my friends any more so i'm trying not to text them but it's hard. I really want to just curl up in a ball and cry with somebody there. I don't want them to comfort me, I don't want them to help me, I just want them to be there. I just want not to be alone. I don't want to hide it and nobody to notice. I need people to look out for me and I know it but I need to bring myself to that point of actually accepting it.
So confused at the moment.
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I almost want to phone again and ask for a sooner one but I just don't have any time I can call so I guess i'll just wait. I really want some recognition for all this paranoid-like stuff. I want to know it's okay I guess and give it a name. I like having lables, they help. Doctors tend to think it's bad to give lables though, I know that, I want them to tell me what this is though. Then I know it's the [insert diagnosis] making me think it not me and I can blame it on that.
I'm feeling better than I was last night but still not good. I feel alone maybe. I don't know. I'm really confused at the moment and I want somebody just to stay with me and tell me it's okay and keep an eye one me but I can't ask anyone to do that and it's awkward anyway. I'm so scared of what's happening. It's like i'm going back again but it's sorta worse now cos I take it out on me more. I wan't to just let it all out but I don't want to worry anyone. Only person I can tell is my psyc but I have to wait over a week. I know I can wait and that i'll be okay but it's still going to be hard and I don't want it to be.
Some of my neighbours are having a party or something and I can hear it. I don't mind the noise but hearing them all having fun and laughing is making me feel more lonely. I don't want to worry my friends any more so i'm trying not to text them but it's hard. I really want to just curl up in a ball and cry with somebody there. I don't want them to comfort me, I don't want them to help me, I just want them to be there. I just want not to be alone. I don't want to hide it and nobody to notice. I need people to look out for me and I know it but I need to bring myself to that point of actually accepting it.
So confused at the moment.
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Original post by kiss_me_now9
(Also, what is this famous twiddly? I keep hearing people mention them, but I have no frigging clue what they are. Are they fun?)
Spoiler
(Also, what is this famous twiddly? I keep hearing people mention them, but I have no frigging clue what they are. Are they fun?)
Spoiler
Google tangle creations. There AMAZING they keep your hands busy, which is good for SH stuff, and they keep you occupied and good to just fiddle with. You can get them fairly cheap on amazon
half of MHSS has one thanks to me I think 
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I'm so, so tired. Cycled 16 miles today (at 12mph average which is pretty fast for my crappy bike) so it's understandable, and I also haven't really been taking any of my meds or hormones properly so that might be ****ing my body over a bit. Should really get on top of that. It's silly how worried I am about fitness and then not taking thyroid hormones properly which will probably make me put fat on. Stupid. 
Anyway being tired niggles at me because it reminds me of how I used to feel all the time when depression was worse, and I start to wonder if I'm going downhill again and that's a horrible thought. I think diazepam also dulls my mood a bit, and I had to have some earlier. And alcohol, cos I like to abuse my CNS depressants.
Just bleh. Feels like I'm chasing unachievable fitness goals and just what is the point? I can bike up ****ing hills and run a few miles without dying and I'm not even sure why I give a ****.
Anyway being tired niggles at me because it reminds me of how I used to feel all the time when depression was worse, and I start to wonder if I'm going downhill again and that's a horrible thought. I think diazepam also dulls my mood a bit, and I had to have some earlier. And alcohol, cos I like to abuse my CNS depressants.
Just bleh. Feels like I'm chasing unachievable fitness goals and just what is the point? I can bike up ****ing hills and run a few miles without dying and I'm not even sure why I give a ****.
Physically I'm quite tired but mentally I'm buzzing which is nice for a change 
So I'm getting some more of my sisters wedding gift sorted out.
However if the dog across the road doesn't stop barking soon I may be going for a walk to shut it up Been barking since ****ing 11pm.
So I'm getting some more of my sisters wedding gift sorted out. However if the dog across the road doesn't stop barking soon I may be going for a walk to shut it up
Been barking since ****ing 11pm.Original post by PonchoKid
Apparently crying in front of my boyfriends mum wasn't my smartest move. Bloody Waterloo road! I was screaming no do she ran to the living room to see what was up and I was just there in tears 
Just so hot ATM though absolutely roasting, I can't deal with it
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Just so hot ATM though
absolutely roasting, I can't deal with it Posted from TSR Mobile
I know! It's boiling! Try rubbing some cold water or ice cubes on spots like the back of your neck, your wrists, knees, elbows, forehead, small of your back and chest. It's what I do before bed on a really hot night and it works wonders! That and drinking load of water and thinking cool thoughts
just think though- we're actually having a summer this year! That's cause fore some celebration. We have sunshine! 
(Although I'd appreciate a tad not breeze and a little less heat).Posted from TSR Mobile
Original post by kiss_me_now9
Physically I'm quite tired but mentally I'm buzzing which is nice for a change So I'm getting some more of my sisters wedding gift sorted out.
However if the dog across the road doesn't stop barking soon I may be going for a walk to shut it up Been barking since ****ing 11pm.
So I'm getting some more of my sisters wedding gift sorted out. However if the dog across the road doesn't stop barking soon I may be going for a walk to shut it up
Been barking since ****ing 11pm.Awesome! Good for you (and your sister too by the sounds of it)
I feel your pain. My neighbours are having a party and have been yelling and laughing since like 10! :P
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Original post by PonchoKid
Feeling really low tonight, so low I'm lying to my boyfriend about how I'm feeling
Triggering stuff potentially
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Triggering stuff potentially
Spoiler
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you're fine just the way you are! But hey you can always try messing about with new hair styles, you could even dye it. May be something cool to do with your bf or to keep you occupied tonight. Hope you feel better tomorrow. You don't have to lie to him, give it a think again later. He sounds like he's been really understanding and helpful for you so remember that too.
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It's too hot to sleep, even with both windows wide open. Lying here is making me remember six years ago today, when I couldn't sleep because the hospital was too loud and I couldn't get comfortable because of the drip in my arm. Anniversaries should be meaningless and I've been fine all day it's just lying here unable to sleep which makes me want to cry.
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I want to sleep so badly cause I'm physically exhausted. But I can't stop thinking about tomorrow and the horribleness it will bring. I feel like a bad person for having these thoughts and feelings. maybe i deserved it all after all. maybe i should suffer. I just want to sleep. I'm so tired. Why can't I sleep
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Sorry guys can someone help me?
I really need one of those factsheets you guys were taking about to sent to a friend. I have severe depression and a friend/ex just doesnt understand and I thought it might help to send them something to explain.
I tried to find it on MIND but whether its my phone or my brain somethings not working and I cant find it
Could someone like me please?
I really need one of those factsheets you guys were taking about to sent to a friend. I have severe depression and a friend/ex just doesnt understand and I thought it might help to send them something to explain.
I tried to find it on MIND but whether its my phone or my brain somethings not working and I cant find it
Could someone like me please?
Got a cracking headache I want to go to bed but my BF is out and I hate the idea of someone creeping into the flat when I'm asleep, it freaks me out. I guess I'll just sing to some more youtube and carry on crafting.
I want to go to bed but my BF is out and I hate the idea of someone creeping into the flat when I'm asleep, it freaks me out. I guess I'll just sing to some more youtube and carry on crafting.Original post by zonkfrog
Sorry guys can someone help me?
I really need one of those factsheets you guys were taking about to sent to a friend. I have severe depression and a friend/ex just doesnt understand and I thought it might help to send them something to explain.
I tried to find it on MIND but whether its my phone or my brain somethings not working and I cant find it
Could someone like me please?
I really need one of those factsheets you guys were taking about to sent to a friend. I have severe depression and a friend/ex just doesnt understand and I thought it might help to send them something to explain.
I tried to find it on MIND but whether its my phone or my brain somethings not working and I cant find it
Could someone like me please?
This is MINDs depression one:
http://www.mind.org.uk/mental_health_a-z/7980_depression
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Original post by bullettheory
This..
Thank you
Original post by zonkfrog
Thank you
Good luck with your mate
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