The bride invited me. And I hate the groom.
So now I'm stuck trying to decide how much cleavage is enough cleavage to make him upset/uncomfortable without upsetting the bride as well. He's
an overly-conservative christian who is still upset because I turned him down in ninth grade. She's a far-too-young-to-be-married crazy woman.
I feel like there should be a formula for this.
Open bars as the primary reason for attending weddings.Outdoors in a rather lovely courtyard. Dress code is pretty loose and casual. Guys are expected to wear ties, girls are expected to look nice. Is this one ok??
Any other suggestions?? My budget is a little tight. (LESS THAN $200)
I'm dress shopping for a wedding. Watch
- Thread Starter
- 13-05-2013 08:14
- 17-05-2013 17:45
Personally, I think it's a great dress, but if it's going to upset the groom/ family of the groom then it's probably best to wear a shrug/ pashmina over it. If you're going to the actual service, and especially if the service is in a Church, then definitely cover shoulders. Or another dress, it really does depend.
Anyway, the primary focus of a wedding day is the bride, so make sure you dress according to what she would find acceptable and don't upstage her!
- 21-05-2013 05:04
What about this:
It's elegant and more cover up than the one you suggested.
or this one:
Another elegant piece.
Both are one shoulder and I think it should be alright.
- 21-05-2013 07:22
Your friend is getting married and all your concerned about is upsetting the groom by showing some cleavage.
Considering he's getting married, I very much doubt that he cares you rejected him and what you'll be wearing.
Posted from TSR MobileLast edited by BANS2012; 21-05-2013 at 07:24.
- 21-05-2013 07:47
Be honest, what do you think's going to happen here?
You show some cleavage, his poor conservative mind can't handle it and he has a full-fledged mental breakdown and apologizes for everything whilst you ride off, laughing victoriously, into the sunset cleavage-and-all?
He either won't notice/care because he's busy, like, getting married... or he'll notice, turn his nose up a bit, make some derogatory comment behind your back, then continue with his wedding.
This seems like a ridiculous reason to choose a dress. Also, aren't you meant to be friends with the bride? Why not just be happy for her?
- 21-05-2013 11:26
better enjoy the wedding instead of trying to upset the groom
- 25-05-2013 18:47
If you go to a wedding, it's to show your support for the couple getting married, and share in their happiness. To me, your post reeks of immaturity. This event is not about you, or whether or not you like the groom, or whatever else.
If you're truly a FRIEND of the bride, as you claim to be, you'll be happy for her, won't want to do anything to spoil the couple's day, and therefore won't do anything to rock the boat on their WEDDING DAY. This is a day that the bride and groom have probably spent a lot of time and effort in planning.
Most likely, the groom won't even notice you're there, and will only have eyes for his new wife anyway.
Deliberately dressing to disrespect someone's personal beliefs, especially on their wedding day, is rude, obnoxious and immature. If he's a highly conservative Christian, I'm guessing the chances are the wedding will be in a church? In which case, an appropriate outfit would cover shoulders, cleavage, midriff, back and thighs. It's basic courtesy and manners. You may not hold the same beliefs, or even agree with them - but when SOMEONE ELSE is hosting a celebration to which you are invited, it is polite, and generally expected, that you will respect the conventions of such an event for the duration of your attendance. If that is too hard for you suck up and deal with for a few hours, for someone who you're apparently friends with, then decline the invitation.
This couple are getting married, and so are becoming (if people don't already see them as) a social unit. This doesn't mean you have to like the groom. However, as a supposed friend of the bride, it would be nice if you could consider and respect HER enough, to not disrespect her husband, at THEIR event.
Dressing inappropriately for an occasion only makes YOU look bad. It makes other people think that either you don't know how to dress for a certain occasion, or are deliberately flouting the convention/dress code/expectations, which is rude.
An event hosted by someone else, at their expense, in THEIR environment/territory, in line with THEIR beliefs, surrounded by THEIR friends and family, to celebrate the beginning of THEIR marriage, is not the time or the place to stage YOUR childish plea for attention. If you REALLY feel a (sad and desperate) need to try and make the groom feel uncomfortable by getting your tits out, host your own party, on YOUR dime, at an appropriate venue.
I agree with everything other posters have said, by the way.
Your OP makes you come across as rude, obnoxious and childish. Not knowing you in real life, I can't say for certain that you are those things. But from what you've written here, that is how you come across to me. I wouldn't want you at my wedding. Either dress appropriately and suck it up for a few hours of your life, or don't attend.Last edited by treasureBelle; 26-05-2013 at 00:26.
- 25-05-2013 18:53
Also, I'd like to add that I can excuse someone dressing in a way that makes someone else uncomfortable if it's not deliberate.
If I went to a church wedding for a conservative couple and someone truly didn't know that their outfit wouldn't be appropriate in the church, I can completely understand that. But I really don't like the OP's attitude of knowingly dressing specifically to make the groom uncomfortable.
- 25-05-2013 22:26
If you are going into wedding just because you want to make someone feel uncomfortable, then you should think of an excuse not to go. Otherwise, you will ruin the atmosphere there and probably will ruin the relationship between you and the bride.
- 25-05-2013 23:38
Normally I love offering dress advice, but the personality you've conveyed from your post sounds like you'd be better suited wearing a black bin bag.
The guy's getting married, like he gives a **** that you rejected him in 9th grade. Get over yourself.