Well we used to be in contact with each other, still are online.
Basically he used me and he was interested in someone else, I think he was never really into me but cant be certain (may have been interested in us both i guess)
I was in a bad way mentally, and I was very desperate, and no offence but he was too, and we decided to meet where we had sex. I think it was somehow out of availability of each other. Before this he'd only expressed interest in a friendship.
After this he cut contact with me because I came needy I guess.He obviously wasn't after a relationship. I was.
I do think it is a bad idea(becasue of fear he wants me in bed), just dunno why i believe i want it so much, can honestly say i feel nothing for him romanticaly anymore, but I just feel he's messed up and seems good deep down. But just messed up. I really wish we could be friends because we chatted about it before we messed each other up. I wish there was a way back to that even besides what we did. Imo what happened was a total mistake and I'm sure we had a nice friendship except it. *naievity *
He seems not the committing type he's too laddy, and just didn't want a relationship, but somehow did want me and like me as a person, is it even possible?
Now he's gone back to caiming we are 'friends' But i'm not sure if he is aiming for sex/casual relationship, or literally just friends. Should I try and find out?
I would refuse anything sexaul with him, that i'm sure of. He needs someone else but he needs mental help more than that, he just isn't relationship material. Friendship probably?
Probably I didn't want him romantically even. At all. think he was just there and easily available and I believed he could give me something he couldn't. What to do?
what should i do re:a guy Watch
- Thread Starter
- 14-05-2013 20:33
- 15-05-2013 11:32
Firstly. You're over thinking stuff waaaaaaaay too much.
Secondly. Leave the past where it is, nothings going to change
Now where to start?
Ask him what he wants, make him promise he'll be honest and ask whether he wants to be friends with benefits or just friends or even best friends? then tell him what you want...
if it matches then that's great you both know where you stand and you have nothing to worry about just give it a little time and everything will be fine
if he says he wants casual sexual benefits tell him you don't want that...if he is loyal enough to you as a friend and respects you enough he will agree to just being friends...if he doesn't want to be 'just friends' he really isn't worth it, what's the point of being friends with someone who's just going to use you for sex and have no respect for you, you don't need fake friends around you, especially at a time of mental/emotion unstability, it'll just make your state of mind worse and fxcked up again :\
i know you want to help him get better but the only way he can do that is if he sees it himself, obviously try to be a good friend as much as possible but if he doesn't return the favour by being a good friend and instead just asks for sex, you have no choice but to let you friendship drift apart...if he realises what a good frind he's missing he'll come back, if he doesn't then he can't care about you that much so you don't need him in your life
hope that helped xx
- Thread Starter
- 15-05-2013 15:21
That did help, thank you x
- 17-05-2013 23:24
No problem x