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    Hello this is my first post and I am applying to be a year 11 prefect I was wondering if people could read over my application and possibly change some aspects or give me feedback, thanks!

    I would like to start by saying I would be more than privileged to take on the role of head prefect or any of the other roles from head of the charity committee to normal prefect, it would be an honour to be appointed any of these roles.

    I am wouldn’t think of myself as being the typical student to be applying for the position of school prefect, I have not always worked to my full potential, I have not handed in work when it is due or I have not a done it to the best of my ability and I have also received complaint slips, detentions and other sanctions. I do not see my actions over the past four years at school as a reason not to be selected. In my opinion not being a perfect student over the past four years allows me to bring something to this roll that others may not be able to bring.

    I would like to become a prefect as I see this is an excellent opportunity to contribute back to this school, which had supported me greatly throughout my time at school. I do regret not taking every opportunity I had in the past and I feel my previous behavior over the past four years will give me more reason to remonstrate against actions similar to ones of my own when I was in the position of the younger students so I can help them take every opportunity and I can stop them making similar mistakes to mine.

    I feel I would be good for the role as I think being a prefect will allow me to be much more responsible and it will allow me to set an example to students while making sure I can help them and guide them without being impetuous towards them as I feel some previous prefects have been resulting in them not helping the situation in the slightest and only causing the students to be more rebellious toward prefects and staff. In my opinion students who have never been had sanctions opposed on them or students who have never done things wrong in the school can’t connect or understand younger students who adopt this type of behavior as well as prefects who have been in the same position in the past. Looking back on my actions I regret the disrespectful things I have done and I regret no taking all my opportunities to learn but I think this will allow me to understand students who may be in the same position I have been in and I hope I will be able to convince them to change and take these opportunities while they can. I will also be able to carry out duties to the best of my ability and I would like to help out the school that has helped me more than I could have wished for. I do not have much experience with this type of role apart from my work experience in which I was a class room assistant with a year 6 class, I do feel this gives me some experience with controlling younger students and I felt very comfortable and I greatly enjoyed it.

    If I did get appointed to any of the roles available I would be honored, also I feel it would give me an opportunity to fully change my attitude toward my school life, I have realized I would like to take every opportunity I can whether it be learning to the best of my ability or sporting opportunities I feel being appointed to one of these roles is that start of a new section in my time at Rishworth.

    Yours Sincerely,

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    Looking at it quickly you don't really mention what stuff you have done for the school e.g clubs or whatever
    Also you use "I" perhaps a bit too much making it flow less well
    You also used "I feel" a few times consecutively which you can adjust


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    First of all the pernickety bits - grammar at the start of para 2 is wrong and so is the spelling of role at the end of para 2, but that's easily fixable
    As previously mentioned I find it doesn't flow very well, as you mention how your bad behaviour could be an advantage in the middle 3 paragraphs - plan before you write? Also, explain how you've changed and will not muck about for the next two years.
    Also, go into more detail about your previous experience, and don't put yourself down! Do you have experience involving teamwork as you could also add that, as I assume you'd be working in a team


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    Don't keep reminding why you shouldn't get it at the start, maybe one example is enough.
    Also maybe a joke to lighten the mode.

    I just winged mine, when I spoke I basically picked bits from everyone elses who had gone before....and I got it

    This was posted from The Student Room's Android App on my GT-S5830i
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    Its great, just used a few words too many times though
 
 
 
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