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Which comes first peoples perceptions of you or convenience? Watch

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    Ok so I went to the cinama's with my family, mum, aunt and cousin several days ago. My mum has a cold and coughed at me so I decided to move to the next seat, leaving a seat between me and my mum. Its easier anyway because we had our own arm rest so I thought why not spread out a bit. When I went to the cinema's with a friend I did the same I left a seat between us so that we would have our own arm rest.

    My aunt said that she thought it was rude though and asked why I did it. She knows that Im not the social type (I dont have friends/boyfriends and all that) so she just wanted to bring that up I think. I said that it was more convenient because we each had our own armrest and i said my mum was coughing anyway. She said 'yea but how do you think it makes people feel, people might think that you think they smell, it was a social outing'. I said if you want to put perceptions before convenience then so be it. She said but if everyone put convenience first people would be coughing, burping and farting. I said ' they often do but for arguments sake that could be impacting on other people watching the film, me moving a seat away wouldnt impact on other people'. I said we went to watch the film and she was like yea but it was still a social outing.

    She wasn't annoyed she just wanted this discussion but what do you lot think? I dont see the need for everyone to be sat right next to each other I just find it more comfortable to have my own seat/arm rest hah. If others want to sit next to each other then fine.
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    (Original post by civilstudent)
    Ok so I went to the cinama's with my family, mum, aunt and cousin several days ago. My mum has a cold and coughed at me so I decided to move to the next seat, leaving a seat between me and my mum. Its easier anyway because we had our own arm rest so I thought why not spread out a bit. When I went to the cinema's with a friend I did the same I left a seat between us so that we would have our own arm rest.

    My aunt said that she thought it was rude though and asked why I did it. She knows that Im not the social type (I dont have friends/boyfriends and all that) so she just wanted to bring that up I think. I said that it was more convenient because we each had our own armrest and i said my mum was coughing anyway. She said 'yea but how do you think it makes people feel, people might think that you think they smell, it was a social outing'. I said if you want to put perceptions before convenience then so be it. She said but if everyone put convenience first people would be coughing, burping and farting. I said ' they often do but for arguments sake that could be impacting on other people watching the film, me moving a seat away wouldnt impact on other people'. I said we went to watch the film and she was like yea but it was still a social outing.

    She wasn't annoyed she just wanted this discussion but what do you lot think? I dont see the need for everyone to be sat right next to each other I just find it more comfortable to have my own seat/arm rest hah. If others want to sit next to each other then fine.
    Sounds like a generational gap to be honest. Different things are rude to different groups. I wouldn't find that impolite, but I can see older people might.
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    (Original post by civilstudent)
    Ok so I went to the cinama's with my family, mum, aunt and cousin several days ago. My mum has a cold and coughed at me so I decided to move to the next seat, leaving a seat between me and my mum. Its easier anyway because we had our own arm rest so I thought why not spread out a bit. When I went to the cinema's with a friend I did the same I left a seat between us so that we would have our own arm rest.

    My aunt said that she thought it was rude though and asked why I did it. She knows that Im not the social type (I dont have friends/boyfriends and all that) so she just wanted to bring that up I think. I said that it was more convenient because we each had our own armrest and i said my mum was coughing anyway. She said 'yea but how do you think it makes people feel, people might think that you think they smell, it was a social outing'. I said if you want to put perceptions before convenience then so be it. She said but if everyone put convenience first people would be coughing, burping and farting. I said ' they often do but for arguments sake that could be impacting on other people watching the film, me moving a seat away wouldnt impact on other people'. I said we went to watch the film and she was like yea but it was still a social outing.

    She wasn't annoyed she just wanted this discussion but what do you lot think? I dont see the need for everyone to be sat right next to each other I just find it more comfortable to have my own seat/arm rest hah. If others want to sit next to each other then fine.
    Have you been tested for autism?
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    (Original post by civilstudent)
    She wasn't annoyed she just wanted this discussion but what do you lot think? I dont see the need for everyone to be sat right next to each other I just find it more comfortable to have my own seat/arm rest hah. If others want to sit next to each other then fine.
    If I was your mum I would've coughed all over your face. **** do you think you are? Brought you into this world, you can take a few viruses for me.
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    (Original post by Pastaferian)
    Have you been tested for autism?
    haha if she has then she won't understand your joke.

    Are you artistic?
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    (Original post by McFlury)
    haha if she has then she won't understand your joke.
    Are you artistic?
    I used to be. Lately, I've been spending too much time getting into med school.
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    My mum is usually the one who suggests we space out in an empty cinema. :dontknow:
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    (Original post by Pastaferian)
    Have you been tested for autism?
    Actually Ive always thought more of the population should be tested for dependant PD!
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    We all do it at college as well, having a desk either side makes sense, you can spread your things out and it's easier to work.

    In a social situation it can be seen to be rude (depending on who you're with), just dont deviate too far outside the social norm - sit next to them; be polite, make conversation - act as though you want to be with them
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    I think if you're going out with your friend then they're obviously not going to be offended since they know your reasons. However, it might be frustrating for other people if there's little space to sit and you and your friend are pretty much taking up 3 seats when you only need 2 (people aren't going to want to sit inbetween you).
 
 
 
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