The Student Room Group

Problem. Need control in life but i lack it

I am posting annonymous for a reason.
Recently i have felt that i am not in control of things. at one point i even took an overdose. Thats now passed and someone persuaded me to see a Doctor about it. But i couldn't stop myself. I wanted everyone to see what they were doing to me was killing me. I need to show them that i am not a piece of crap but i am scared of the consequences.
I get upset and angry easily. and each time i want to hurt myself to make up for what i have caused. But it never compares. I try to help i try to be nice but when they constantly tell me i am fat and constantly telling me i am worth nothing i lose even more of myself. Hurting myself is the only way to escape it. I went to Doctor about the overdose but i couldn't say much i just said i had took too much of something and told him i couldn't do anything about it.
I don't want help medical help i want easy ways that i can do that i myself achieve with out any professional help. I wasnt to be able to control my anger and feelings. Can anyone advise me of anything i could try?
Reply 1
I don't blame you for getting angry if people are calling you fat and making you feel worthless. It's not you that you need to change, it's the people around you. If you can't change them i.e. if they are family, or people you can't get away from at work or in school then you need to change you attitude as to how much their opinion is actually worth. I would say that anyone who puts you down in that way and tells you are not worth anything is a pretty low-down, pathetic person themselves and their opinion of you should therefore not count for anything. The sad fact is that a lot of people don't realise or don't care when their actions are hurting someone. I consider myself a nice person but I know that I wasn't always nice to all people when I was in school. People can be very self-involved, especially when they are teenagers, and not realise the huge consequences their actions have on others. You need to tell yourself that they are the one with the problem and that it is frankly sad that they feel the need to belittle other people in order to make themselves less insecure.
Reply 2
1013
I don't blame you for getting angry if people are calling you fat and making you feel worthless. It's not you that you need to change, it's the people around you. If you can't change them i.e. if they are family, or people you can't get away from at work or in school then you need to change you attitude as to how much their opinion is actually worth. I would say that anyone who puts you down in that way and tells you are not worth anything is a pretty low-down, pathetic person themselves and their opinion of you should therefore not count for anything. The sad fact is that a lot of people don't realise or don't care when their actions are hurting someone. I consider myself a nice person but I know that I wasn't always nice to all people when I was in school. People can be very self-involved, especially when they are teenagers, and not realise the huge consequences their actions have on others. You need to tell yourself that they are the one with the problem and that it is frankly sad that they feel the need to belittle other people in order to make themselves less insecure.

Thank you. But i With the family... i feel like i have to lock myself away from everything. They went away for the weekend last week. My sister was taken into hospital... and for once i was the happiest person ever But they came back eventually and i tidied up for before they got home. but when they got in they shouted because it wasn't good enough. i swept floors mopped floors cleaned walls and sides washed the floors hoovered the front room cleaned washing and all they could do was shout cos it wasn't good enough. After they finised shouting i went upstairs and cried a bit but then my sister came up and had her shot at me. After that i lost everything i reached for the tablets and took the whole pack I didn't feel scared of the consequences in fact i felt pleased with myself for doing it but then everything fell down for me. i knew i would be leaving behind a few people who cared about me. and i regreted it But i wasnt to be able to control what i feel
Reply 3
Ok, well if it's your family you need to sit them down, either individually or together, and explain just how much their words and actions are hurting you. All families have arguements and snipe at eachother but it seems like yours in ongoing and that it is havng a lasting effect on your health. I'm sure they love you - like I said, people are sometimes so wrapped up in their own worlds that they can't see the dammage they are doing to others. If your sister is ill then it is understandable that there is strain and tension but you shouldn't be the one it gets taken out on.
Of course you can't control how you feel but you can control your actions. Hurting yourself is not going to make things better. You need to change the attitudes of the people in your family towards you. Why do you think they pick on you? I know sometimes it can be done with no reason but maybe if they explained certain things that you do that cause them to shout, you could stop. And, in turn, you can explain the things they do that make you want to hurt yourself. If they are reasonable people and they care for you, they should be able to make the change.
Reply 4
Would someone threaten you with their fist or knives if they cared about you?
Reply 5
Sorry i didn't mean that.

They care very little. cos whatever i do it is wrong.
I have been hurt by them so many times.
but i cannot stop what i feel i try to be nice to them