The Long Distance Relationship Society Advice Centre Mark II Watch

pinkbullets
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#61
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#61
This week it feels like everything my boyfriend has done/said/not said has massively irritated me. I'm not used to feeling like this, especially when we're actually together, and I hope it goes away soon.
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luinecu
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#62
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#62
Really appreciating all the posts on here everyone

My boyfriend and I have been together just about 3 years now, and we're about to be doing proper long distance for the first time. We have done short stints apart before, a month or so when I was volunteering away, but now we are both off to uni abroad for the next 4 years! He's going to be in Holland, and I'll be in Slovakia. They are both really intense courses as well so we don't anticipate seeing each other for 2+ months at a time, a big change since we live together right now

Don't know whether he will take a look on this thread, but he's a the student room member too!

Right now I'm being a bit wobbly about the whole thing, but I think that worrying about what it will be like is making me crazy! Its a bit hard seeming as our friends are already off getting married and buying houses, having babies even (I'm 24), whilst we are about to go do the student thing all over again and put off all the adult stuff for another good few years. Not that we would be doing any of that anyway, but it does feel a bit like going backwards.

Going back to what you were talking about... If you are on a contraceptive pill where you take a break between packs you can safely take one pack straight after the other to skip your period (I wouldn't do this for more then 1 though). You may get some spotting through the month, but it will hold it off. There is a ton of advise on the live journal community VaginaPagina. Personally I've never been with anyone who has an issue with period sex, I'd be in dire straits if I did since mine last a good 8-10 days :rolleyes:
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smorga30
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#63
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#63
Do any of you partake in naughty messages and/or sexting? I swear that's how every convo ends up going these days.








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pinkbullets
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#64
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(Original post by smorga30)
Do any of you partake in naughty messages and/or sexting? I swear that's how every convo ends up going these days.








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We do a lot of sexting, although we tend to go through stages of sexting a lot then not sexting at all for a few months. I think it's very useful in an LDR, it helps keep the intimacy and stops you from always talking to each other like friends. I don't know about you but me and my boyfriend tend to tease each other quite a lot and have a bit of "banter" so it's nice to sext occasionally to keep up the intimate side of the relationship.
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smorga30
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#65
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#65
(Original post by pinkbullets)
We do a lot of sexting, although we tend to go through stages of sexting a lot then not sexting at all for a few months. I think it's very useful in an LDR, it helps keep the intimacy and stops you from always talking to each other like friends. I don't know about you but me and my boyfriend tend to tease each other quite a lot and have a bit of "banter" so it's nice to sext occasionally to keep up the intimate side of the relationship.
We sext most days and do naughty pics once a week or so. We also do Skype/FaceTime sex a few times a week. Needless to say we are extremely ready to have each other again. The only issue is its sooooo frustrating at this point. Less than a month to go now and I am so ready to be in my mans arms. I miss just cuddling and holding hands more than anything tbh


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ChelseyElla
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#66
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#66
I've been living with my boyfriend at uni the last year but he's just graduated so we're spending the summer together before a year apart. I'm really dreading going from having him around all the time to barely seeing him. Hopefully he'll have a job so will be able to afford to come and see me.
I don't deal with stress very well but having him around to support me makes a big difference. I'm pretty worried about struggling to cope without his physical presence!
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smorga30
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#67
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#67
(Original post by ChelseyElla)
I've been living with my boyfriend at uni the last year but he's just graduated so we're spending the summer together before a year apart. I'm really dreading going from having him around all the time to barely seeing him. Hopefully he'll have a job so will be able to afford to come and see me.
I don't deal with stress very well but having him around to support me makes a big difference. I'm pretty worried about struggling to cope without his physical presence!
Aweee me and my mister spent the year living and traveling the world together and now have been apart nearly 4 months as have almost a month left. Really been rough but if you really want it to work it will.


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CherryCherryBoomBoom
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#68
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#68
(Original post by smorga30)
Do any of you partake in naughty messages and/or sexting? I swear that's how every convo ends up going these days.

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Yeah, we do this sometimes, usually initiated by me :teehee:


(Original post by ChelseyElla)
I've been living with my boyfriend at uni the last year but he's just graduated so we're spending the summer together before a year apart. I'm really dreading going from having him around all the time to barely seeing him. Hopefully he'll have a job so will be able to afford to come and see me.
I don't deal with stress very well but having him around to support me makes a big difference. I'm pretty worried about struggling to cope without his physical presence!
I went through this same sort of thing, and we've been LDR for 2 months now. It was a massive struggle for me to cope at the very beginning, but it does slowly get better over time, especially if you're spending your time apart doing fun and/or productive things (work, study, hobbies, etc) to keep yourself busy, cos believe me, boredom and idleness will make it feel 10 times worse! And of course, definitely keep up the regular contact by whatever means and frequency suit you both :yep:
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AB25
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#69
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#69
I've been thinking about this a lot recently- is there anyone on here who's thinking about moving to their boyfriend/girlfriend's city? Or anyone who's partner may be coming to live in their city soon? It'll be another couple of years at least until this happens for me and my boyfriend- he wants to move up to be with me- but it is our dream and we're really committed to making it happen I'm so desperately wishing he was moving now, but we're simply not financially stable or old enough (i'm only 18 and he 22) for this step yet. We are thinking of getting a flat together when it happens. What are other people planning for their long-distance future?
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smorga30
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#70
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#70
(Original post by AB25)
I've been thinking about this a lot recently- is there anyone on here who's thinking about moving to their boyfriend/girlfriend's city? Or anyone who's partner may be coming to live in their city soon? It'll be another couple of years at least until this happens for me and my boyfriend- he wants to move up to be with me- but it is our dream and we're really committed to making it happen I'm so desperately wishing he was moving now, but we're simply not financially stable or old enough (i'm only 18 and he 22) for this step yet. We are thinking of getting a flat together when it happens. What are other people planning for their long-distance future?
I moved to another country to be with mine the first time and now again. So yes.


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CherryCherryBoomBoom
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#71
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#71
(Original post by AB25)
I've been thinking about this a lot recently- is there anyone on here who's thinking about moving to their boyfriend/girlfriend's city? Or anyone who's partner may be coming to live in their city soon? It'll be another couple of years at least until this happens for me and my boyfriend- he wants to move up to be with me- but it is our dream and we're really committed to making it happen I'm so desperately wishing he was moving now, but we're simply not financially stable or old enough (i'm only 18 and he 22) for this step yet. We are thinking of getting a flat together when it happens. What are other people planning for their long-distance future?
Yeah, I've been thinking for a while of moving to my boyfriend's city, as I find the long distance rather awful and his city is a lot nicer than mine anyway. And I already have some practice living away from home and living with him (we met backpacking abroad), so it wouldn't phase me too much deciding to move again. I've even already been applying to colleges in his city, though they will be costly and I dunno how much my parents would help me out with money. Otherwise, I could move there just to work, but I need to save up money first as I can't afford to move out right now. But hopefully in the near future we can close that distance :yep:. And when i move, i probably wouldn't go live with him straightaway as we've only been together for 4 months now, but I would probably just do a flat-share with other people first while he continues living with his parents, so at least we'd still have our space whilst also being able to continue the relationship short distance :yep:

Good luck to you. I know how it's not easy to be in this limbo stage of wanting to close the distance but not knowing exactly when it can happen, but I'm sure we can do it eventually :yep:
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pinkbullets
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#72
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#72
(Original post by smorga30)
We sext most days and do naughty pics once a week or so. We also do Skype/FaceTime sex a few times a week. Needless to say we are extremely ready to have each other again. The only issue is its sooooo frustrating at this point. Less than a month to go now and I am so ready to be in my mans arms. I miss just cuddling and holding hands more than anything tbh


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Aw I feel for you. The month will be over before you know it though : ).
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Anonymous #5
#73
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#73
(Original post by AB25)
I've been thinking about this a lot recently- is there anyone on here who's thinking about moving to their boyfriend/girlfriend's city? Or anyone who's partner may be coming to live in their city soon? It'll be another couple of years at least until this happens for me and my boyfriend- he wants to move up to be with me- but it is our dream and we're really committed to making it happen I'm so desperately wishing he was moving now, but we're simply not financially stable or old enough (i'm only 18 and he 22) for this step yet. We are thinking of getting a flat together when it happens. What are other people planning for their long-distance future?
Even before I met my boyfriend my plan was always to move away from my home town after I graduate next year, so yes if things work out with him (which I hope they do) and we're still together then I'd move to his town. Whether or not we live together is down to him really. I doubt he'd move to where I am as there's not many jobs in my area in the industry he works in.
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Pigling
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#74
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#74
(Original post by AB25)
I've been thinking about this a lot recently- is there anyone on here who's thinking about moving to their boyfriend/girlfriend's city? Or anyone who's partner may be coming to live in their city soon? It'll be another couple of years at least until this happens for me and my boyfriend- he wants to move up to be with me- but it is our dream and we're really committed to making it happen I'm so desperately wishing he was moving now, but we're simply not financially stable or old enough (i'm only 18 and he 22) for this step yet. We are thinking of getting a flat together when it happens. What are other people planning for their long-distance future?
I have to talk about this because it is the best part! Having gone 4 years through my medical degree in an LDR with only 1 year left, I am getting just desperately, desperately excited about it all (and a bit daunted at the same time). So many changes are going to happen next year, I am going to be a doctor :eek:, I am going to finally have my paws on some MONEY (sort of), and I am going to finally move in with my boyfriend setting in motion our life plan (that whole cheesy engaged married, pets, babies fantasy fodder that I'm sure isn't unique to me/us!). And I'm really looking forward to it but I'm also a bit :eek3: *my life is going to flash by* / *the end of an era*, and it does feel like growing up in many ways all at once. I just know it is going to rush up on me as well, because last year went so fast and I think this year will go faster. It's funny that when things you've wished and wished for are just around the corner, it feels really different: less yearning/wishing, more content, more excitement but more anxiety!
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Anonymous #5
#75
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#75
(Original post by smorga30)
Do any of you partake in naughty messages and/or sexting? I swear that's how every convo ends up going these days.








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Yes and like in your case its nearly every conversation, and it's me who usually starts it

Anyone got any tips/advice to keep the cost of travel down? Ive already got the young persons railcard.
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pinkbullets
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#76
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#76
(Original post by Anonymous)
Yes and like in your case its nearly every conversation, and it's me who usually starts it

Anyone got any tips/advice to keep the cost of travel down? Ive already got the young persons railcard.
Book as far in advance as possible, if it's a lot cheaper you might want to consider changing trains a few times rather than going straight to your destination and get National Express coaches/Megabus instead of the train whenever possible.
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Anonymous #5
#77
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#77
(Original post by pinkbullets)
Book as far in advance as possible, if it's a lot cheaper you might want to consider changing trains a few times rather than going straight to your destination and get National Express coaches/Megabus instead of the train whenever possible.
I already change the train a few times (I don't actually think there is a direct train to his town from mine actually). I looked into coaches it was cheaper than the train but only very slightly and as it took a lot longer and depart/arrive at awkward times I didn't think it was worth it (I don't like coaches much anyway after a few bad school trip experiences :P). I've been told that National Express sometimes do offers were they offer travel to anywhere in the country for really cheap (eg. £5 each way) is this true? If so I might consider it.
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pinkbullets
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#78
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I already change the train a few times (I don't actually think there is a direct train to his town from mine actually). I looked into coaches it was cheaper than the train but only very slightly and as it took a lot longer and depart/arrive at awkward times I didn't think it was worth it (I don't like coaches much anyway after a few bad school trip experiences :P). I've been told that National Express sometimes do offers were they offer travel to anywhere in the country for really cheap (eg. £5 each way) is this true? If so I might consider it.
I know Megabus do anywhere in the UK for £5 on a Wednesday. I'm not sure about the National Express.
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Anonymous #5
#79
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#79
(Original post by pinkbullets)
I know Megabus do anywhere in the UK for £5 on a Wednesday. I'm not sure about the National Express.
Thanks. I guess maybe this person got the two mixed up maybe. Its a pity Wednesdays aren't a suitable day for us (he works full time during the week and I'm going to be in uni Thurs and Fridays when I go back in September).
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passionate27
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#80
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#80
It never works out-

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