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    Hey im totally new to this. First as you can see by the title i start my first year of uni in september however iv only just found out im pregnant although im only 6weeks its still early days. I do already have a 5year old son. But i was posting this to see if anyone has been in this situation or know someone who has. I mean im not going to drop out of uni as i believe i can still do this. I know its goin to be hard for me as my course will finish in may and ill be due in march. So i know the ups and downs. But any advice would be great. Thank you. Soph
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    First of all, congratulations!

    I think your best bet would be to contact your university and explore your options. The good news is Easter break is around late march/early April for most places (I looked at some websites).


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    If you can defer starting university for a year. This will reduce the pressure on you and allow you to establish a routine before starting university. Whilst universities do have crèches, they may not take many if any babies under 1.

    I've known quite a few people in similar situation, but already at university. Only a few of those who were in their final year managed to make it through, but it wasn't easy. Those in year 1 and 2 tried to, but ultimately decided to defer or had to retake the year. So whilst it possible, be realistic about how much you will be able to do in the later stages of pregnancy.

    Just to be clear this isn't a post to say it is not possible, just have a good think about the logistics if you do decide to start university this year.

    Good Luck.
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    well im glad your not considering abortion! good luck and show your kids you can be a supermum!
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    (Original post by edjunkie)
    If you can defer starting university for a year. This will reduce the pressure on you and allow you to establish a routine before starting university.
    This is great advice. Speak with the university about possibly deferring to next year. This makes sense! You want to enjoy being pregnant - not stressed out because of course work and thinking about long term plans. As you say, it's still early days, but explore all your options in-depth.

    And congratulations on both university and the baby!
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    I agree with the above about considering deferring. If you're 5/6 weeks now then you'll be full term around the time of your first end of year exams. That could make things really tricky for you. I've just finished my first year as a mother of 3 and there's no way I could have done as well as I have this year if I'd been heavily pregnant. Obviously it's possible to do it, I've a friend who recently completed her final year whilst pregnant but for me it would have been extremely difficult. Good luck with your pregnancy and congratulations!


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    Thank you everyone. This has been a great help. I was waitin for someone to tell me im stupid and forget about it lol. But no it was a shock and kinda came as a supprise but you cant pick and choose eh. I have rang the university they have told me its completely upto me. If i want to deffer a year they understand my situation. However i can try the first term if i dont think i can cope then i can come back next year also. I think i might try my first term see how i feel just im not really one for sittin around doin nothin and with it bein so hard to get a part time job even harder now that im pregnant. Although my boyfriend does work away its not too bad. But thank you again. Its helped me alot
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    During my PGCE course one of the women got pregnant (everybody realised before she did, i.e. she was complaint she was feeling ill in the mornings). She had to do her placement with a large bulge and managed it fine.

    The only iffy issue was the year after, as the baby is quite a handful and nobody will hire her because of this nor does she want somebody else raising her son....

    She plans to come back in a year or two but she'll be deskilled by then.
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    (Original post by sophiie88)
    I have rang the university they have told me its completely upto me. If i want to deffer a year they understand my situation. However i can try the first term if i dont think i can cope then i can come back next year also.
    Just be careful about this from a student finance standpoint. If you start the course but decide that it is too much, you may use up a full year of funding on a partly complete year. This may be an issue later on in the course if you decide it is not for you or you encounter problems which neccessitate retaking a year. Whilst there is some flexibility with SFE to take into account health reasons for non completion it is at their discretion. Having had a few friends who sailed through the first 6 months with text book pregnancies, only to have issues in the last trimester which were very disruptive, all were fine in the end, but it was very stressful. Also do not under estimate how much time medical appointments can take up, at just the wrong time of day.

    There is no need to do nothing, this year though. Get the reading list for your course, ask for access to library if the university is local. Ask if you can sit in on a few lectures at the start of term without formally enrolling. There may be charge for library access. Your baby with only be around 5-6 months old when you start your course, so taking the opportunity to get ahead with reading would be worthwhile.
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    (Original post by SannaS)
    well im glad your not considering abortion!
    I fail to see how your opinion on abortion is helpful here? :confused:
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    Do you know what type of assessments they have on your course? If it is mainly coursework based then you might be able to prepare a bit in advance to keep on top of it. Also, with most courses your first year doesn't go towards your final results so you just need to pass it.
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    (Original post by roobie72)
    I fail to see how your opinion on abortion is helpful here? :confused:
    I gave the advice I could
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    (Original post by sophiie88)
    Hey im totally new to this. First as you can see by the title i start my first year of uni in september however iv only just found out im pregnant although im only 6weeks its still early days. I do already have a 5year old son. But i was posting this to see if anyone has been in this situation or know someone who has. I mean im not going to drop out of uni as i believe i can still do this. I know its goin to be hard for me as my course will finish in may and ill be due in march. So i know the ups and downs. But any advice would be great. Thank you. Soph
    Congratulations on the pregnancy.

    Have you thought about deferring for a year? That may be best all round, it means you can have you're pregnancy without having to worry about doing your degree, and once the bambino is born, it gives you a few months to sort out childcare and the like.

    If that is not an option, then I'm sure you could still do your degree, with enough planning and support from your family and institution. Whatever you decide to do, good luck.
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    First and foremost congratulations,

    Get in contact with the university that you will be attending, they will have dealt with people in your situation many times and they will offer great advice and will also offer support.
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    (Original post by Justpin)

    The only iffy issue was the year after, as the baby is quite a handful and nobody will hire her because of this nor does she want somebody else raising her son....

    She plans to come back in a year or two but she'll be deskilled by then.
    What a chauvinistic thing to say! First of all its illegal to discriminate against women wanting to work who have young babies, and I do not think any school would be stupid enough not to hire her on those grounds. Secondly - taking a year or two out of a career does not make you deskilled! nonsense!
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    (Original post by mamamia)
    What a chauvinistic thing to say! First of all its illegal to discriminate against women wanting to work who have young babies, and I do not think any school would be stupid enough not to hire her on those grounds. Secondly - taking a year or two out of a career does not make you deskilled! nonsense!

    How about a reality check?

    Just because something is illegal does not mean it does not happen, speeding is illegal as are recreational drugs.... still happens. All that will happen is that they will give an excuse other than she has a baby to look after instead.

    It is supposed to be illegal to hire on skin colour but studies between equal candidates with different names (English and foreign sounding ones) the people with foreign names find it harder to get interviews and jobs.

    Its just the way it is.....

    Finally work experience depreciates extremely rapidly, it is currently an employers market, employees are easily replaced and have virtually no power.

    Employers can pick and choose, even 6 months out can devalue your experience massively vs somebody who has been in constant employment, as their experience is more up to date and things change.


    Its just the way things are.... I don't make the rules nor am I am employer. I would note I have worked for many women bosses and a couple of men bosses who explicitly state (in private of course) they won't hire people of child bearing age. Even though they can claim 105% of the wages, temps who fill the gap know they are temps and therefore more likely to be utterly ruthless to companies they work for. I've seen this in action in better times, where the employee turns round and states thats not in my contract.....

    Plus temps tend to want to jump to permie positions elsewhere meaning they could be looking to find yet another temp which could do the same thing. H a company in the middle of Manchester had this, one of the dept staff went on maternity, we had 14 temps come and go while she was off.
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    (Original post by CelticSymphony67)
    Congratulations on the pregnancy.

    Have you thought about deferring for a year? That may be best all round, it means you can have you're pregnancy without having to worry about doing your degree, and once the bambino is born, it gives you a few months to sort out childcare and the like.

    If that is not an option, then I'm sure you could still do your degree, with enough planning and support from your family and institution. Whatever you decide to do, good luck.
    A bit off topic - but there's a username if ever I've seen one
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    (Original post by mamamia)
    What a chauvinistic thing to say! First of all its illegal to discriminate against women wanting to work who have young babies, and I do not think any school would be stupid enough not to hire her on those grounds. Secondly - taking a year or two out of a career does not make you deskilled! nonsense!
    Although I agree with your views (in an ideal world that's how it should be) - why don't we come back to the real world? Of course it's illegal to discriminate - but it happens. Will any organisation ever admit it? Of course not, but the barriers in place (from the firms end) are of course that she's less flexible and may take time off because of the baby. We can't hide from the fact that this will be considered and if there are two candidates, X & Y - who are equally qualified yet X has a baby and Y doesn't, Y will most likely get the job. Sad but true.

    EDIT And no, not deskilled - that's daft. But rusty yes - at least compared to a new grad.
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    (Original post by pmc:producer)
    A bit off topic - but there's a username if ever I've seen one
    Are you a Tim?
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    (Original post by pmc:producer)

    EDIT And no, not deskilled - that's daft. But rusty yes - at least compared to a new grad.

    Which goes back to hire x or y? Y has been in continual employment, x is a tad rusty.
 
 
 

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