My friend is driving me crazy! Is it wrong to distance myself? Watch
The arrangement worked well in all fairness. We made plans and supported each other and tried to get over it together.
So fast forward 10 months. I haven't spoken to my ex once and have moved on, I have new hobbies and interests, I have made big life and career decisions, I have seen a therapist and dealt with personal issues. I feel a lot happier.
She carried on slyly seeing the boy. Then moved onto another guy instantly - didn't she love the other guy? New guy cheats and lies to her continuously. She keeps lying and saying she's over him but keeps slyly seeing him. Postpones her degree because of extenuating circumstances (perhaps reasonably considering her family life isn't ideal), starts a dead end job.
All the while slyly sleeping with the old guy, she dates about a million different guys (not sleeping with). They generally don't go further but I get sick of hearing about every new guy she's talking about.
She told me she was seeing a therapist but she hasn't gone back since.
She talks about herself the whole time (we've told her before) and so she has ostracised everyone, even her female best friends. She's noticed and always moans about having no friends and I can't even reassure her.
And now the last straw. I've been encouraging her to go travelling for a bit and get her head straight, make some new friends etc. And she says no, she wants to put a deposit down on a house. WHY? What the hell is that going to change? Arghhh.
So what do I do? It's no longer tit for tat at all. She's an absolute burden on me. I don't want to distance myself because she obviously has issues but she never does anything to make things better for herself whereas I've come a long way.
Is it wrong to distance myself and leave her on her own?
You just distancing yourself is cruel especially if you haven't explained your reasons and if you are her only friend left. As a friend just try and be there for her she probably feels alone and maybe she is probably sorry for the boyfriend thing, if you feel like she is still the same then explain to her how YOU feel so she can make a mends.