Soppy vs Harsh

was just wondering...i know a lot of girls who seem to go for jerk off guys or losers or ones who treat them like crap or all three! i'd like to think i'd go for nice guys but despite my better judgement i seem to find soppy or cheesey or TOO nice guys a real turn off and kind of annoying...i don't know why tho!

my question to other girls is, despite your better judgement do you find yourself attracted to cliche bad boys?

if i was responding to this post i'd probably say that going for a loser-guy says more about the girl attracted to him than the guy himself, i'm not convinced that's the case. is it thrill of the chase or what?

Reply 1

high priestess fnord

9

i dont get it having allways gone for "nice" guys myself.

Reply 2

randdom

20

I go for nice guys everytime having been out with a guy who made me miserable I never intend to do it again.

Reply 3

sheryl06

1

[QUOTE="Pink_Chick"]was just wondering...i know a lot of girls who seem to go for jerk off guys or losers or ones who treat them like crap or all three! i'd like to think i'd go for nice guys but despite my better judgement i seem to find soppy or cheesey or TOO nice guys a real turn off and kind of annoying...i don't know why tho!

my question to other girls is, despite your better judgement do you find yourself attracted to cliche bad boys?

if i was responding to this post i'd probably say that going for a loser-guy says more about the girl attracted to him than the guy himself, i'm not convinced that's the case. is it thrill of the chase or what?[/QUOTE

i think i do find the 'babd boys' attractive although long term i wouldn't want to be with one if that makes sense? seriously though i think that cheese and soppiness is the biggest turn off ever!

Reply 4

Singh_87

15

I dunno if you want guys to respond to this, but I was, for some reason or another, really nice to my ex, as in 'too' nice...at the time, she didnt say anything, and we were together for like 11 months...However, when we broke up, she said to me that, because I was too nice she didnt find the relationship fulfilling.... Maybe thats what puts you off nice guys ? The fact that they'll do whatever you say, and they will probably give their life for you !! With the 'bad boy' stuff, they probably arent bothered about you, and this attracts girls... lol, I find it weird myself, but hey, whatever you lot want! :smile:

Reply 5

The Mudman

10

There's a difference between being a nice guy, and being cheesy though.

Reply 6

Bubble Fairy

1

Hum...let me think.

I dont think Id want a real bad boy because Id probably get hurt & wouldnt trust him.

Nor would I want a really gud, nice boy either, because I cant be doing with soppiness & having to be nice all the time.

Hence I go for the good-looking guy with character & a rebellious streak.

Reply 7

Singh_87

15

Lol..I understand the difference between being cheesy and nice...And she didnt say that I was being cheesy, she just said I was nice....But then again, my ex was something different!! :p:

Reply 8

Amnesia

2

From a male perspective I would say that women are not and have never been attracted to 'nice guys.' It never ceases to amaze me that most men can't work this out. I would not say that women are attracted to 'bad guys' because they are bad, but they are attracted to men who are self-confident, won't be bossed around and don't suck up to them constantly. Often these men are the so-called 'bad guys'.

Reply 9

cinder

10

I like the balence, I hate cheesy push over types but I'm not going to stand being miserable for a guy.

Reply 10

st8_of_mind

Amnesia

From a male perspective I would say that women are not and have never been attracted to 'nice guys.' It never ceases to amaze me that most men can't work this out. I would not say that women are attracted to 'bad guys' because they are bad, but they are attracted to men who are self-confident, won't be bossed around and don't suck up to them constantly. Often these men are the so-called 'bad guys'.

That sounds about right. Self-confidence is a real plus point, and they always seem to show it off by being jerks. To be honest, it's easy to be attracted to a 'bad' boy but at the end, it's the good, nice onese which you can hold a conversation with that makes you fall for them. Attraction and actuallying liking them are kind of different. I suppose that initial attraction's important for then taking the effort to get to know them... :redface:

There's no answer.

By nice i don't actually mean soppy, sorry, just guys who are considerate and friendly and don't treat you like dirt.

Reply 11

sssh

10

It's all about the coexistence of contraries, as William Blake so rightly said.

Reply 12

sheryl06

1

I think that it's a lot to do with the chase too (...or maybe thats just me :p:

) because the 'bad boys' generally speaking are harder to 'get' if you know what I mean. Which is more fulfilling and lets face it, its fun to flirt too :wink:

lol. However, I do agree with whoever it was that said that there is a difference between being cheesy and nice. :smile:

Reply 13

cinder

10

sssh

It's all about the coexistence of contraries, as William Blake so rightly said.

you're following me and mentioning Blake...lol

sheryl06

However, I do agree with whoever it was that said that there is a difference between being cheesy and nice. :smile:

theres a thin line between nice and too nice though, the nice bordering onto cheesy. When a guy gets sentimental thats when I'd bail.

Reply 14

Schmokie Dragon

17

Bad boys are attractive (funny, daring, adventurous etc) but hell to live with. And most nice guys are just boring. And being too soppy is ewww!

But for a long term partner, it is better to be comfortably bored than to live with hell-incarnate.

Although, much to my amazement (!) I have just fallen for a nice guy!!

Reply 15

sssh

10

cinder

you're following me and mentioning Blake...lol .

cinder

theres a thin line between nice and too nice though, the nice bordering onto cheesy. When a guy gets sentimental thats when I'd bail.

Hmm...it's difficult for me to take compliments (my friends have been trying to teach me how to do it graciously recently, rather than saying "oh no, you're completely wrong". They say: "now say "thankyou", Hannah") so I feel uncomfortable around people who are too nice. I guess compliments are nice from time to time, though...my boyfriend has the balance about right :smile:

Reply 16

Anonymous #1

I used to be the stereotypical 'bad boy', not caring about girl's feelings, being a dick to them etc etc.
However i realised in the last year or so that in the long run i was gonna be the one getting the short straw, as much as girls like a bit of excitement, in reality they dont want to be messed about and they wanna be able to trust their fella.
So to the OP, it's not an either/or situation, there are plenty of guys who are confident, funny and have all the positive attributes that you might find in 'bad boys' but without the immature bull**** that goes with it, and without them being soppy. You'll probably find this more as you get older, as all those guys like me who used to mess girls around learn how to behave!

Reply 17

Ron Stoppable

14

Balance, kids.

It's all about taking the best bits from the various stereotypes and putting them together.

Reply 18

Anonymous #2

Yes but when girls go for bad boys, they ususally come with being messed around, and probably cheated on.

So come on, what is worse? Cheating or soppiness?

Reply 19

cinder

10

Anonymous

Yes but when girls go for bad boys, they ususally come with being messed around, and probably cheated on.

So come on, what is worse? Cheating or soppiness?

Cheating, then you have a decent reason to dump them and won't make them cry.
It's a terrible generalisation to say the soppy guy doesn't cheat. My friends ex, he was romantic and sweet, from an outsiders point of view perfect...he cheated on her twice. He genuinly is a nice guy, I'm still good friends with him, we've talked about it a million times...he just can't say no.

Soppy vs Harsh

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