probably going to end up kissing him- nervous! Watch

Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 12 years ago
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I realize that this is probably a very stupid post. Oh well.. :rolleyes: About a month ago I met his guy, and we spend quite a lot of time together and had fun that week. We held hands and stuff, there was definatly attraction there. Did not kiss though. We've been in contact via email almost every day now. He lives in another city so we've not been able to meet in person after I left.

In a few days I'm going to visit him. I'm very excited of course, but also slightly nervous, as I've never had any romantic relationship or kissed anyone before. I'm also very shy. What do I do?? In one way I want to kiss him, but it also scares me. He's such a good friend, I don't want to ruin that. How can I not though, when my whole body starts feeling wierd when I'm close to him? If it does happen, then what the heck to do I do??? I'm sure that when/if the time comes it'll come natural and all that, but for it would still be nice to know for now, when I'm worrying about it! What should do with my arms and hands, for example? What does it feel like to kiss someone? Afterwards, what do you do? How do you best deal with being physically attracted to someone when you at the same time want to just be normal friends??:confused:

Am I making to big a deal out of this? I see people in the halls at school kiss, and they don't seem affected by it. Yet when whe stood close to each other, and he was looking at me and I at him and it felt like we almost were going to kiss I felt all tingly and wierd and the next few hours I couldn't stop smiling. I'm kind of confused...
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Anonymous #2
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Dont be scared, its not that big of a deal at all. Look on the bright side, your gonna love kissing its awesome. Just try and enjoy it.
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Mercer
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Sometimes people kiss in a sort of everyday way, as a greeting etc. That doesn't mean that you can't get a bit weak at the knees when expecting a first kiss etc. And in my case I can still be disoriented and made drunk by a kiss, very easily.

As for the rest: take it naturally, don't stick your tongue down his throat, and rest your hands on his back, maybe his hair, maybe more risque....


Oh, you refer to just wanting to be friends, but because of the tone of the rest of the post I didn't take it too seriously....
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phantom
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have you seen the film hitch? his kissing advice is quite good. move in a little closer to him, tilt your head just a little and slowly and gently go to kiss him on the mouth. dont forget to close your eyes!! then the biggest advice anyone can give someone is mirror what hes doing, take it slow and get in rhythem with him dont use too much tongue as it will go all slobery and nasty and its just not nice. then, to finish, gently kiss him on the lips and pull away slowly and perhaps with a smile. if you do it right he may be really suprised and impressed. dont worry youll do fine!!
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1013
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#5
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Sound like it's going ot be good when it happens! All the feelings you are having are totally normal. I'm so jealous, the first few kisses are always so exciting!
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Alewhey
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Man, that first post has been feeling achingly nostalgic.

Young love...
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Anonymous #1
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Thanks everyone...

Is kissing one of those things we're born knowing how to do, or do we somehow learn from watching people around us (and then by doing it ourselves)?
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Anonymous #3
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I was recently in a similar (but opposite) situation with a girl I really like - it'll work out fine if you like each other, seems to just kind of happen. If your serious about the bing normal friends bit, then don't kiss him, you'll only confuse the hell out of the both of you, but if there might be something more (and the whole thinking about it, weak at the knees thing suggests that there is), go for it. Oh and if your both shy, when you go on your walk, and theres not too many people about, just ask - its not embarassing, and worth doing ;p
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Anonymous #4
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I'm kind of in the same situation except I am really good friends with this guy, I don't think I do fancy him, i just want to kiss him because I never have had a first kiss.. am i just being desperate or should i go for it?
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Anonymous #3
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Dont do it. How old are you? Even if youre in your i dunno late 20s, its still nto worth having that sort of kiss with someone you dont fancy - it will lead to huge complications, and hurt feelings, maybe even the end of the friendship.

And 'that sort of kiss' is definatley worth having as a first one - either decide whether or not you fancy him, or if youre still serious about the friend thing DONT.

The fact that youre worried about it suggests that its a fairly big thing, and you dont want to wast that on someone you dont fancy, cus you'll really end up confusing yourself.

That said, if the whole 'bodyt feelign weird' thing you describes was caused by him, and not the whole 'kissing' thing, then maybe you should have a long look at what your feelings for this guy are. Is there a reason NOT to turn it into a relationship if attraction is there - is it just a bit of a scary thought?
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alej18
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#11
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Thanks everyone...

Is kissing one of those things we're born knowing how to do, or do we somehow learn from watching people around us (and then by doing it ourselves)?
theres no point in worrying about it, theres no real way to improve at it except by practice, and of course to do that you have to be, well, doing it. so just do it.
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sweetface.
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#12
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I realize that this is probably a very stupid post. Oh well.. :rolleyes: About a month ago I met his guy, and we spend quite a lot of time together and had fun that week. We held hands and stuff, there was definatly attraction there. Did not kiss though. We've been in contact via email almost every day now. He lives in another city so we've not been able to meet in person after I left.

In a few days I'm going to visit him. I'm very excited of course, but also slightly nervous, as I've never had any romantic relationship or kissed anyone before. I'm also very shy. What do I do?? In one way I want to kiss him, but it also scares me. He's such a good friend, I don't want to ruin that. How can I not though, when my whole body starts feeling wierd when I'm close to him? If it does happen, then what the heck to do I do??? I'm sure that when/if the time comes it'll come natural and all that, but for it would still be nice to know for now, when I'm worrying about it! What should do with my arms and hands, for example? What does it feel like to kiss someone? Afterwards, what do you do? How do you best deal with being physically attracted to someone when you at the same time want to just be normal friends??:confused:

Am I making to big a deal out of this? I see people in the halls at school kiss, and they don't seem affected by it. Yet when whe stood close to each other, and he was looking at me and I at him and it felt like we almost were going to kiss I felt all tingly and wierd and the next few hours I couldn't stop smiling. I'm kind of confused...
Thats like me, i am the same.
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darkstar09
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#13
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My first kiss was awful!!! But it wasn't me. It was him (it was not his first kiss so he had no excuse!). He used too much tongue (the goal is not to shove it all the way down the other person's throat:mad: ). And he slobbered all over my chin. Ewwwww! But don't be discouraged if it suxs. Besides my first kiss was with a guy I didn't really like all that much. I just wanted a kiss. But go for it so you at least get an idea about how its like. Hope your first kiss is much better than mine.
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Anonymous #1
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I've been wondering a bit about it this whole tounge business. I've thought of a kiss as putting your lips to someone else's lips. So is this wrong, and where do the tounges and slobber come in?


(Original post by Anonymous)
The fact that youre worried about it suggests that its a fairly big thing, and you dont want to wast that on someone you dont fancy, cus you'll really end up confusing yourself.

That said, if the whole 'bodyt feelign weird' thing you describes was caused by him, and not the whole 'kissing' thing, then maybe you should have a long look at what your feelings for this guy are. Is there a reason NOT to turn it into a relationship if attraction is there - is it just a bit of a scary thought?
Dumb question number 2- how can you be sure that you fancy someone? :rolleyes: Seems like it should be obvious, but what if its not? I definatly feel different about him than my guy friends, but also different from my previous crushes. It is the being near him that makes me feel wierd, not the thought of kissing someone (when I'm with him I don't really think, just kind of float in the moment. Its afterwards that I start fretting!).

Turning it into a relationship is a VERY scary thought! Its something totally new, for one. Until I met this guy I was unable to imagine any boy/man ever being remotely attracted to me. Also, he lives in another city. I won't be able to see him very often. And thirdly, the biggest problem, I actually like the guy. I don't want to lose his friendship. I care about him. I don't want to throw that away just to appease my hormones or whatever that have gone haywire.
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Big Fat Mel
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You sound like a nice guy, kissing him might be a bit wierd but if he doesn't reciprocate, I'm sure you can still be friends.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Big Fat Mel)
You sound like a nice guy, kissing him might be a bit wierd but if he doesn't reciprocate, I'm sure you can still be friends.
I'm a girl.
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Big Fat Mel
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Sure you are..."Anonymous"
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Bunny Boiler
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#18
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You should kiss him...

It sounds like you are in a good relationship...


and kissing is nowt to be scared of...on the contrary...

'tis awesome...
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clicker9
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#19
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Maybe doing it is awesome, but thinking about it is very scary! What if it destorys our friendship? What if I suddenly don't know how to act around him? Is the awesomeness of kissing worth that?:confused:
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Anonymous #3
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Think you forgot to post as anon there ;p

If he is making you feel that way, then it sounds like you might have feelings for him, perhaps slightly more than a crush - so if you intend to have a relationship with him (and dont let different cities stop you), go ahead and kiss him - it'll be great ;p
(That said, don't expect too much - that erm comes much later)
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