Boredom = Breakup Always?

Whether its from this forum or another forum. Whenever I read a post about a relationship turning slightly sour due to problems arising such as the infatuation is over (honeymoon period), changing personalities and other similar things.

I get this vibe that most people suggest that the relationship is turning sour and that breaking up would be the best answer.

However doesn't every single relationship go through a rough patch/boredom stage several times? It just seems like its impossible for a relationship to be always happy throughout after an extended period of time.

Giving up on the relationship at the first signs of turning sour rather than trying to fix the problem just doesn't seem right. Are people suggesting that problems can't be fixed within a relationship?

Prehaps I'm wrong but thats the Vibe I'm getting occasionally while reading posts here. :confused:

Reply 1

Glory

I think the only time when boredum is the reason for a break up, is when either party isnt that interested in keeping the relationship going. However come couples do go through a boredum patch and its their love and feelings that rides them throught the rough patch.

Boredum to me normally means either trying something new or moving things along. Boredum is just a sign of things becoming timetabled and no spontaneity.

Edit: Spelling! for the person who neg repped me, you could of just asked nice.

Reply 2

wojewodztwo_pl

no i dont think that boredom should ever equal a breakup. the honeymoon period ends in all relationships. younger people in seroius relationships, by younger i mean 19-25, break up too easily these days. its usually due to the fact that one of the people in the relationship think that just because there was a fight, or that they are bored, or that the relationship is 'weighing them down' rather than 'making life easier'. if your with someone its not going to be fantastic all the time, you are gonig to have fights, you are going to get bored sumtimes, you are going to feel as though things would be easier without a relationship, but thats no excuse to break up. if you like the person, and can talk to them, then you should look at all these obstacles and think to yourself 'oh man i cant wait for this problem to come up, because im sure that me and my gf (or bf) will be able to work through it.' thats why its important to know how to talk to your partner, because looks last 10 years, personality lasts a lifetime. You can't choose who you love but you can chose how love treats you. Relationships DO take work. That is going to be the case with anyone you're with.

Reply 3

blondie_

yes but if their feelings have changed they should break up. if not and there just bored they should try to see it through. yet if they know they dont want to be in that relationship they should break up. if their bored it can make the relationship turn sour yet they should try to see it through first before breaking up for defiante.

Reply 4

Sazarina88

I think you're correct.

I often give advice to people who say they're with someone else but want someone else and think it would be better with the new person - I say that do they really think it would be better? The honeymoon period will always end at some time in a relationship.

All relationships generally start off fantastic, then the romantic high fades. I think boredom is the wrong word - I think people get used to a relationship and want something fresh.

In my opinion, you should try and work through any down patches in a relationship if you truly believe the relationship is worth saving.

Sarah

P.S. Why did you post as anonymous?

Reply 5

Anonymous #1

Sazrina88 You've got a good point. You work towards a relationship you think its worth saving, so its upto you.
Though sometimes people can be so confused and misleaded by other oppertunities that arise.

What happens after the honeymoon phase though, are you still in love as you had been initially or would there be another type to replace those emotions?

Reply 6

username47781

Yeah i notice these days so many who start a relationship especially during the teen years end it with the excuse its not as good as it used to be, its not working out etc. And they do this without having a proper talk at where it started to go wrong, dumping and going on to someone else does not solve the problem.

Reply 7

Glory

I know now that im in my almost mid twentys, i value relationships different to how i did when i was in my late teens.

I have to say many of my relationships which ended in my teens, i almost always got bored either of them or the relationship. But now i see things different, if things get boring its a challenge to try and fix it and improve it. Things just seem worth the effort, more so than they used to. I dont know if thats maturity or a general desire to start to try and settle down with someone.

Reply 8

Caribou

No. Boredom does not mean the end of a relationship. There are so many things you can do to get interest back (from both sides).. my relationship was fixed with better sex.

Reply 9

Anonymous #1

HagerVor

No. Boredom does not mean the end of a relationship. There are so many things you can do to get interest back (from both sides).. my relationship was fixed with better sex.