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Hating life and depression is kinda my life now:( Watch

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    #1

    It's no life at all! I don't get along with my family and they don't get along with me! Living at home with them is actually causing me pain and it has got worse as the weeks/months have progressed. They think I have an easy life and I just feel sorry for myself and I never did but now, I do. I cannot go on like this and I have had thoughts about killing myself but honestly I'm a scaredy cat and I long for the day that I can have my own life. But because that is quite a way away I need help NOW and tips on how I can change my life for the better and not have to put up with my family making me feel worthless ! ?
    Thank-you so much for your help!. No nasty replies though please!
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    Hmmm I thought for a few minutes how I would tackle your issue. But I'll start with where you said "I long for the day that I can have my own life". Life is here, now. It won't 'start' at a certain point, it isn't a goal. It is each and every day and what you make of it. Remember no matter what you do the world won't stop spinning. I guess you seek the freedom of independence in terms of your family. You may feel that how day to day life now is making you resent them more. I don't know what your situation is, but my recommendation is that:
    -if you are in secondary school- there's nothing for it i'm afraid, you have a long way to go before you can realistically and logistically be free from your family
    -if you are at college/ sixth form right now, work hard and get into university: you will really enjoy the university experience, plus you get to go as far as you'd like and live out, meet new people etc.
    -If you are at uni right now, think about how far you've come. You are at the highest point of education on the brink of the future, the good job. The life you want. Then try to contemplate the sheer opportunity for friends or a partner at uni (literally THOUSANDS of students in one place), join a society or a club. You never know who you could meet.
    -If you are unemployed/ aren't in education: FIND A JOB (I know the market is difficult, and there are issues with the amount of people vying for jobs) but if you want change, a reason to move out or move away then you need to start MAKING it happen.

    "I need help NOW and tips for how I can change my life for the better"
    There are so many ways to change your life for the better, whether it be how you feel about yourself (self-actualization) or what you can do externally which can change your life for the better.
    1: Self actualization- recognizing ourselves, and loving ourselves.
    We are stuck with ourselves, for the rest of our lives. No one will ever know you as well as you know yourself and because of this fact, we need to find our center in ourselves. 'How can we expect others to love us, when we don't even love ourselves?'
    -Body confidence: go to the gym, start jogging, go swimming, join a sports team, a yoga class, a samba class etc
    physical workouts get our hormones going and keep us in shape, confidence will build as you self improve.
    -Looks: Use cosmetics, facial scrubs, moisturiser, skin care products, eat healthier (greens and fruit)
    -Samaritanism/Charity: We can improve how we feel inside, by doing things for other people, the satisfaction of helping others can be very rewarding. In terms of how to go about doing this, apply at charity shops, scouts/cubs/Brownies.
    Confidence: Let people know what you are like, make friends, expand networks etc.

    2: External
    Hobbies: take up a class in something that may interest you- drawing, modelling, photography, design etc Give yourself a passion.
    Travel: There is so much of the world to see, so much exposure to be had, cultures you've never experienced. Make a bucket list of places you want to go, or things you want to do and work towards it. We can often draw 'power' from the fact we are working towards something.
    Partner: A person to care, confide in, share experiences with can teach you a lot...about them, about yourself. This is something that is external but can lead to a lot of internal revelations and happyness.

    At the end of the day, you control your life. You must surely know what things you like, chase them, work towards them. The change will not be a certain point in the future, a point on the calender shall we say. If you start making changes, subtly, even slowly one day you won't even wonder about how to 'get there' or if you've arrived, because you will know you have. No one else can tell you if you are happy and you will know it inside yourself.
    • #2
    #2

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    It's no life at all! I don't get along with my family and they don't get along with me! Living at home with them is actually causing me pain and it has got worse as the weeks/months have progressed. They think I have an easy life and I just feel sorry for myself and I never did but now, I do. I cannot go on like this and I have had thoughts about killing myself but honestly I'm a scaredy cat and I long for the day that I can have my own life. But because that is quite a way away I need help NOW and tips on how I can change my life for the better and not have to put up with my family making me feel worthless ! ?
    Thank-you so much for your help!. No nasty replies though please!

    OP how old are you?
    I felt the exact same way as you, but I was waiting believe it or not, around 3 years just to 'escape' and get to university, and now, finally my time has come.
    Be patient. You need to have something to look forward to
    I don't get on with my family either, I feel they gang up on me. And so I just sit in my room all day. I'm also very self concious and sensitive so that doesnt really help tbh
 
 
 
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