Hey there! Sign in to join this conversationNew here? Join for free

HELP: Straight guy attracted to a another guy Watch

    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    Hey guys so I don't know who to talk about this to.

    Okay so I know I am straight, I've always been and I'm still turned on by girls.

    But there's this guy who goes to my university, he's one year below. I know it might sound crazy but I felt a thing right from the second I saw him. He looks really like some fine girl: tall, skinny with long hair. It never happened to me before.

    Now I know that I am having a crush on him. I really want to get to know him (btw I know he is gay from some female friends who told me). But I don't know if he'll think I'm a weirdo cuz I've just been out of a relationship with a girl.

    Please I need advice, do you think all of this sounds weird? I really can't stop thinking about him. Did this ever happen to anybody?
    • #1
    #1

    This is normal.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Loreno)
    Hey guys so I don't know who to talk about this to.

    Okay so I know I am straight, I've always been and I'm still turned on by girls.

    But there's this guy who goes to my university, he's one year below. I know it might sound crazy but I felt a thing right from the second I saw him. He looks really like some fine girl: tall, skinny with long hair. It never happened to me before.

    Now I know that I am having a crush on him. I really want to get to know him (btw I know he is gay from some female friends who told me). But I don't know if he'll think I'm a weirdo cuz I've just been out of a relationship with a girl.

    Please I need advice, do you think all of this sounds weird? I really can't stop thinking about him. Did this ever happen to anybody?
    Sexuality is a spectrum (that's what the rainbow flag represents.) No-one is 100% one way or the other. What you are feeling is perfectly natural. I myself have been attracted to people of the opposite gender on occasion (maybe 2 people in my whole life.). Even the likes of Stephen Fry admits he's only 90% gay. Hetero guys always seem reluctant to admit that they have some level of attraction to men. If you are happy with who you are, then pay it little to no heed.

    Having said that, Uni is the place to experiment. Lots of people will be doing the same.

    And he won't think you are weird. He'll probably take it really well. A lot of gay guys (myself included) are attracted to straight guys. Its nice to see the trend working the other way for a change. He'll probably take it as a compliment. Just so long as you don't call him "some fine girl"!

    If it bothers you, go check out the LGBT group. They are usually very discrete, and cater for those who are merely inqusitive too. Especially with fresher's coming up. They'll be able to help you more!
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    If you say that he looked like a girl/very feminine guy then you're probably not gay dude.
    Never happened to me though..
    Offline

    9
    ReputationRep:
    These are your feelings so only you can know how you really feel.

    Do you imagine having sex with him? Are you turned on by gay porn?

    I can have a "crush" on a girl - like this one girl who's dating the brother of the guy I've been dating. She's beautiful, has impeccable style and take amazing photos. I want to get to know her and am obsessed with following her updates on social media. However it is not sexual and I don't want to be in a relationship with her.
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Loreno)
    Now I know that I am having a crush on him. I really want to get to know him (btw I know he is gay from some female friends who told me). But I don't know if he'll think I'm a weirdo cuz I've just been out of a relationship with a girl.
    Lol that's like every gay guys dream I don't see why he would reject you. No just kidding

    If you can't stop thinking about him then you should just go and talk to him. He can't be that unapproachable. And you can't know what he'll think until you actually see his reaction.

    Good luck mate
    Offline

    15
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Loreno)
    Hey guys so I don't know who to talk about this to.

    Okay so I know I am straight, I've always been and I'm still turned on by girls.

    But there's this guy who goes to my university, he's one year below. I know it might sound crazy but I felt a thing right from the second I saw him. He looks really like some fine girl: tall, skinny with long hair. It never happened to me before.

    Now I know that I am having a crush on him. I really want to get to know him (btw I know he is gay from some female friends who told me). But I don't know if he'll think I'm a weirdo cuz I've just been out of a relationship with a girl.

    Please I need advice, do you think all of this sounds weird? I really can't stop thinking about him. Did this ever happen to anybody?
    You realise that it's not just straight and gay, right?
    You're bisexual.

    Sexuality is a spectrum - most people aren't "100%" straight, rather they are much more straight than they are gay, if that makes sense. So it seems you're predominantly heterosexual, but you can find the occasional guy attractive. Though, feel free to call yourself straight since it's clearly quite predominant in you.

    It's not weird that you like him yet have just had a relationship with a female. Many bi guys go through this all the time - one relationship is with a girl, the next is with a guy, the next with a girl, etc, they're just capable of finding both sexes attractive. And you are too.

    If the guy you've got a crush on is gay, then he will likely be understanding. Most gay guys do accept that bi guys exist too.
    Go for it; he's unlikely to find it weird. And even if he does, then so what? Nothing bad can come from getting to know him


    Finally, if you want someone to chat to, PM me - I've been through this myself. I know what it's like to be sure that you're straight but you find yourself attracted to a guy.
    Offline

    15
    ReputationRep:
    "I'm straight but I want to examine this other males anal passage with my endoscope"

    You're bisexual.
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    Thanks for your answer guys.

    (Original post by Millie228)
    These are your feelings so only you can know how you really feel.

    Do you imagine having sex with him? Are you turned on by gay porn?

    I can have a "crush" on a girl - like this one girl who's dating the brother of the guy I've been dating. She's beautiful, has impeccable style and take amazing photos. I want to get to know her and am obsessed with following her updates on social media. However it is not sexual and I don't want to be in a relationship with her.
    Truth is that it's not that much of a sexual thing. I imagine myself with him in a lot more of a romantic way, though he still does attract me. I feel like we would be really good together. I know it sounds kind of crazy because I barely know him.

    I've always been romantic so that's not new. Thing is I've never felt this way and gay porn is really not my thing, it just doesn't turn me on.
    Offline

    15
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Loreno)
    Thanks for your answer guys.



    Truth is that it's not that much of a sexual thing. I imagine myself with him in a lot more of a romantic way, though he still does attract me. I feel like we would be really good together. I know it sounds kind of crazy because I barely know him.

    I've always been romantic so that's not new. Thing is I've never felt this way and gay porn is really not my thing, it just doesn't turn me on.
    It should be mentioned that there are different types of attraction. There's sexual attraction and romantic attraction. If you are either sexually attracted or romantically attracted (or both) to a guy while also being attracted to girls, you're bisexual.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bisexuality <- try the summary of this article, it may help.
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Mockery)
    "I'm straight but I want to examine this other males anal passage with my endoscope"

    You're bisexual.
    Can't you read the post? He's not asking you to tag him into this or that category of people, he's asking for advice.

    I hate it when people categorize the way you do. He's just attracted to someone and that someone happens to be a guy. Gender and sexuality are far more than just: straight, gay and bisexual.

    To the OP: Who cares of the gender as long as you are happy. You obviously have feelings for that person and that's the only important thing.
    Offline

    15
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by GinaLaMalfaisant)
    Can't you read the post? He's not asking you to tag him into this or that category of people, he's asking for advice.

    I hate it when people categorize the way you do. He's just attracted to someone and that someone happens to be a guy. Gender and sexuality are far more than just: straight, gay and bisexual.

    To the OP: Who cares of the gender as long as you are happy. You obviously have feelings for that person and that's the only important thing.
    Apart from asexuals, everyone can be categorised into straight, gay and bi; what's the issue?
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Treeroy)
    Apart from asexuals, everyone can be categorised into straight, gay and bi; what's the issue?
    There's no issue. It's just that I hate when people reduce love into: d*** in the butt /pussy or both. And then categorize them into this or that as a result.

    Some people prefer not to be categorised: I happen to know some. And I believe that it should be just as fine.
    Offline

    15
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Treeroy)
    Apart from asexuals, everyone can be categorised into straight, gay and bi; what's the issue?
    Not really. What about people who don't fit into the gender binary?

    OP: I know it freaks you out but just chill and all will be ok. I know how it feels - I'm gay and currently into a guy.
    Offline

    3
    ReputationRep:
    Lots of hetro people go through bi-curiosity at some point, both men and women. Apparently, Michael Bublé is one of the most common 'gay' crushes amongst straight men. However, if you began finding other guys 'hot' too, then whilst you needn't label yourself you probably are bisexual. Maybe not go to counselling as such, but if you need to get it off of your chest go and see somebody. Maybe contact your university's LGBT society or speak with an LGBT friend?
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    I have some news for you bro...
    Offline

    14
    ReputationRep:
    Pretty sure that makes you bisexual. I'm no expert, but I'm pretty sure. :mute:
    Offline

    9
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by GinaLaMalfaisant)
    There's no issue. It's just that I hate when people reduce love into: d*** in the butt /pussy or both. And then categorize them into this or that as a result.

    Some people prefer not to be categorised: I happen to know some. And I believe that it should be just as fine.
    It is fine, but the OP gave his experience and asked for opinions. From his confusion, he seems to be searching for a categorization, as many people will. For a lot of people, sexuality is quite straight forward, even if it isn't for you.
    The OP was the one starting the thread and the responses he's getting are not unreasonable. Even if you personally don't like categories.
    People who are secure in themselves don't fear to be straight, bi or gay. There is nothing wrong with assuming he is bi, it is for him to decide either way.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    I'm not a big fan of categories, because sexuality is such a diverse thing. In an ideal world, they wouldn't exist. There'd be no need to come out to parents, no fretting over feelings that you don't think you should. You just date whomever you please. That's the vision put forward in most sci-fi. No-one thinks of themselves as gay/bi/straight, they just have their preferences. Similar to how people who like brunettes don't have a different name from those who date blondes.

    Society however loves labels. And I think they are necessary for the time being. Especially as far as gaining rights and stuff goes. Plus if you have a label, you feel part of a select community.
 
 
 
Reply
Submit reply
TSR Support Team

We have a brilliant team of more than 60 Support Team members looking after discussions on The Student Room, helping to make it a fun, safe and useful place to hang out.

Updated: August 17, 2013
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • Poll
    What newspaper do you read/prefer?
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

    Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

    Quick reply
    Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.