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Still a Virgin, give me some of your rules please? Watch

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    Hi,

    I am moving to the UK soon and I am still a virgin, I am not ashamed of it but if I do happen to meet a guy who I like, and we get in a relationship, Shall I wait for a year before I lose it?

    Give me your opinions and tips
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    There's no reason to put off sexual ecstasy. The nexus of space and time where you are now is the most immediate sector of your universe. That being said, why adhere to cultural and societal notions of purity and love when you can decide to start maximising your sensual pleasure ASAP?

    Sex is amazing man, and the whole concept of 'purity' and 'saving oneself physically' is all just cultural manipulation. Come to the UK and **** your brains out.
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    (Original post by Preziosavita)
    Hi,

    I am moving to the UK soon and I am still a virgin, I am not ashamed of it but if I do happen to meet a guy who I like, and we get in a relationship, Shall I wait for a year before I lose it?

    Give me your opinions and tips
    There's no set time for when you have to lose your virginity to someone. Do it only when you feel ready-don't let anyone force you into it. You may be ready after a couple of months, maybe a couple of years, or you may want to wait until marriage-only you can decide.

    When you do lose it, it may hurt a bit, but it's something you'll just have to get through-it'll hurt less the more sex you have
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    (Original post by Vonlenska)
    There's no reason to put off sexual ecstasy. The nexus of space and time where you are now is the most immediate sector of your universe. That being said, why adhere to cultural and societal notions of purity and love when you can decide to start maximising your sensual pleasure ASAP?

    Sex is amazing man, and the whole concept of 'purity' and 'saving oneself physically' is all just cultural manipulation. Come to the UK and **** your brains out.
    This is the best thing anyone could have said in answer to the question.
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    Wait until your mind, body and soul are ready. Be it a month, a year, a lifetime. Don't put some arbitrary period of time on it, equally don't rush into owt
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    (Original post by Vonlenska)
    There's no reason to put off sexual ecstasy. The nexus of space and time where you are now is the most immediate sector of your universe. That being said, why adhere to cultural and societal notions of purity and love when you can decide to start maximising your sensual pleasure ASAP?

    Sex is amazing man, and the whole concept of 'purity' and 'saving oneself physically' is all just cultural manipulation. Come to the UK and **** your brains out.
    This is pretty much what I was going to say. But worded much more nicely
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    (Original post by Vonlenska)
    There's no reason to put off sexual ecstasy. The nexus of space and time where you are now is the most immediate sector of your universe. That being said, why adhere to cultural and societal notions of purity and love when you can decide to start maximising your sensual pleasure ASAP?

    Sex is amazing man, and the whole concept of 'purity' and 'saving oneself physically' is all just cultural manipulation. Come to the UK and **** your brains out.
    The idea that people who choose to save sex for relationships only do so because of societal pressure (we're so thick we can't make up our own minds therefore we must be brainwashed by society, if only we were as free thinking as you :rolleyes:) is beyond stupid and patronising as ****.

    Hedonism (which is what you're saying she should act out of) is an empty way to live.
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    (Original post by ButtonBash)
    The idea that people who choose to save sex for relationships only do so because of societal pressure (we're so thick we can't make up our own minds therefore we must be brainwashed by society, if only we were as free thinking as you :rolleyes:) is beyond stupid and patronising as ****.

    Hedonism (which is what you're saying she should act out of) is an empty way to live.
    Why do you save sex? I'm curious because it seems so pointless
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    (Original post by ButtonBash)
    The idea that people who choose to save sex for relationships only do so because of societal pressure (we're so thick we can't make up our own minds therefore we must be brainwashed by society, if only we were as free thinking as you :rolleyes:) is beyond stupid and patronising as ****.

    Hedonism (which is what you're saying she should act out of) is an empty way to live.
    I didn't say societal pressure, I said cultural notions. Just like we have cultural notions of right and wrong which he don't feel necessarily 'pressured' into believing.

    This person came here asking for advice as to whether or not they should wait to have sex. I advised that they should start having sex.

    If only you were as freethinking as me...
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    (Original post by Tyrion_Lannister)
    Why do you save sex? I'm curious because it seems so pointless
    It helps you to bond with your partner by releasing hormones, or you might want a baby... there's more to it than just OMG FEELZ GOOD THEREFORE DO IT NOW!111!

    (Original post by Vonlenska)
    I didn't say societal pressure, I said cultural notions. Just like we have cultural notions of right and wrong which he don't feel necessarily 'pressured' into believing.

    This person came here asking for advice as to whether or not they should wait to have sex. I advised that they should start having sex.

    If only you were as freethinking as me...
    societal notions of purity


    You basically insinuated it. Society tells us we should keep sex for relationships (the slut-shaming *******s
    :rolleyes:), therefore being complete lemons with brains made of mushy peas we choose to keep sex for relationships because we're actually just incapable of making decisions for ourselves. Society tells us to act in a certain way and we do it, of course.

    It is not cultural or societal manipulation to choose to save sex for relationships and in 2013 society is more sexualised than ever.
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    (Original post by ButtonBash)
    It helps you to bond with your partner by releasing hormones, or you might want a baby... there's more to it than just OMG FEELZ GOOD THEREFORE DO IT NOW!111!
    The bran can't recognise the difference between a person and a dildo. Do you bond with your hand every time you masturbate?

    I have no problem with your choice, I just don't see the reason!
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    (Original post by Tyrion_Lannister)
    The bran can't recognise the difference between a person and a dildo. Do you bond with your hand every time you masturbate?
    That is just nonsense seriously. Plenty of real evidence that oxytocin, plus other hormones, are released after sex and that sex helps you to pair bond.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oxytocin

    Recent studies have begun to investigate oxytocin's role in various behaviors, including orgasm, social recognition, pair bonding, anxiety, and maternal behaviors.
    That's just something I globbed off Wikipedia quickly.

    I have no problem with your choice, I just don't see the reason
    I don't care, trying to change views that are so entrenched is like pissing in the wind.
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    (Original post by Preziosavita)
    Hi,

    I am moving to the UK soon and I am still a virgin, I am not ashamed of it but if I do happen to meet a guy who I like, and we get in a relationship, Shall I wait for a year before I lose it?

    Give me your opinions and tips
    Personally, and this may just be me here so don't take it as the standard. I wouldn't stick around any chick, I wasn't related to, who wouldn't put out for a year. I'm not a masochistic.
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    (Original post by ButtonBash)
    That is just nonsense seriously. Plenty of real evidence that oxytocin, plus other hormones, are released after sex and that sex helps you to pair bond.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oxytocin



    That's just something I globbed off Wikipedia quickly.



    I don't care, trying to change views that are so entrenched is like pissing in the wind.
    Those hormones are also released when you masturbate though that was my point

    I'm not trying to change your view, just very curious. It's the same as my curiousity about religion. I can't understand it so I ask lots of questions to try and see how you think
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    (Original post by Foo.mp3)
    Wait until your mind, body and soul are ready. Be it a month, a year, a lifetime. Don't put some arbitrary period of time on it, equally don't rush into owt
    Foo couldn't have put it more clearly. Don't force it, take your own time, for most girls it can be extremely horrifying at first, especially if you are still in your late teens. as a guy all I can say is to stay away from sexual predators and look for those who are considerate and warm. My previous ex was so surprised with me and in fact praised me for my lovemaking because she had had such a bad first experience. Prior to her relationship with me, she looked at sex as a sort of obligation in return for love and belonging. Not that I'm gloating in my lovemaking skills and not that all women have had similar experiences but I think it's best to warn you in advance...
    Maximize your sweet moments for they are precious little..
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    (Original post by ButtonBash)
    You basically insinuated it. Society tells us we should keep sex for relationships (the slut-shaming *******s [/FONT][/COLOR]:rolleyes:), therefore being complete lemons with brains made of mushy peas we choose to keep sex for relationships because we're actually just incapable of making decisions for ourselves. Society tells us to act in a certain way and we do it, of course.

    It is not cultural or societal manipulation to choose to save sex for relationships and in 2013 society is more sexualised than ever.
    Monogamy is endorsed from day one by a huge array of social institutions. While this preference for monogamy might not manifest itself in Orwellian style propaganda, it still effects who we are as people and our attitudes towards sex and relationships in general.

    When I talk about how our culture and society shapes us, you use the word 'brainwashing' which has a negative stigma attached to it. Moreover, I think you know the word 'brainwashing' has a negative stigma and you're purposely using it to discredit my obviously awesome argument.
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    (Original post by Preziosavita)
    Hi,

    I am moving to the UK soon and I am still a virgin, I am not ashamed of it but if I do happen to meet a guy who I like, and we get in a relationship, Shall I wait for a year before I lose it?

    Give me your opinions and tips
    Well, if you are planning to lose it then why wait a year? Just whenever you feel ready to. For me, it isn't really that big a deal - but you are entitled to your own view, which can't really be wrong as it's a personal issue.
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    (Original post by Tyrion_Lannister)
    Those hormones are also released when you masturbate though that was my point
    You do not bond with yourself when you masturbate. The fact you even suggested that is ridiculous.

    If you masturbate enough it actually effects your sex life and damages your bond with your partner because your brain doesn't know who you should bond with, oxytocin is also released during hugging, touching, cuddling and so on.

    We know now excessive porn is damaging.

    I'm not trying to change your view, just very curious. It's the same as my curiousity about religion. I can't understand it so I ask lots of questions to try and see how you think
    I can see yours and it's just simplistic. Your only argument is it feels nice.
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    (Original post by ButtonBash)
    You do not bond with yourself when you masturbate. The fact you even suggested that is ridiculous.

    If you masturbate enough it actually effects your sex life and damages your bond with your partner because your brain doesn't know who you should bond with, oxytocin is also released during hugging, touching, cuddling and so on.

    We know now excessive porn is damaging.



    I can see yours and it's just simplistic. Your only argument is it feels nice.
    I was being sarcastic. My point was to suggest sex is only for marriage becaus of oxytocin is ridiculous.

    Source?

    My argument is there is no reason not to and it feels nice. Why shouldn't people have sex? There is nothing wrong with having sex.
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    Just do what is right for you, whether that is waiting a year to sleep with someone or doing it with every person you see. Do what you feel comfortable doing when you feel comfortable doing it and don't let any tell you otherwise.

    PS: I am aware of the irony of telling someone not to let people tell them what to do.
 
 
 
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