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Awkward situation between me and my flatmates, please help! watch

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    So I'm a student at uni at the moment, I'm living in halls, this is my first year and I'm 20 years old. Everyone else in the flat I'm living in (there's 4 of us) are in relationships, I'm the only single one. This is embarrassing to admit but I'm also a virgin. I've been in many situations where I could have had sex but I chose not too, I only want to have sex with someone if I'm attracted to them and (I thought) if I'm in a relationship with them. Also I can be quite a quiet person, especially around men.
    There is so much partying going on at uni, and so many good looking lads, and I have been getting alot of attention from them (not to sound like i'm bragging). It's a bit frustrating when all your flatmates are in relationships and you're the only single one..especially when there's so many good looking male students about.
    So anyway, yesterday evening, one of my flatmates (who's also 20, as are his friends) brought over two of his friends from home (he's from a town about 30 miles away from the uni, my uni is in the north of England btw) both of these lads where really good looking and single, and my age (infact they where a few months older than me), most of the guys here are 18/19 and I'm like one of the few 20 year olds. So we all got completely shattered with alcohol as we where all going out to a club in town, we where all taking shots and we where all really drunk.
    By the time we got to the club, me and one of the lads had starting dancing together/kissing/bumping and grinding etc. So we where touching each other a lot and being pretty intimate. When we got back from the club, he suggested we get into bed, and to be honest, I didn't mind because I've felt (and I know this will sound weird) really sexually frustrated, there are so many good looking men here, and I've come to realise I'll only be young once and I don't want to waste opportunities to have a good time, especially as uni does go by so quickly and everyone says it's the best time of your life. So I was completely okay with getting into bed with him. But all my flat mates (who where also all completely drunk) heard us saying we where going to bed. Anyway, to cut a long story short, we kissed and he ended up (and I know this is gross and probably too much information) fingering me for a bit, before I decided I actually didn't want to have sex that night and didn't feel very comfortable with the idea of it. So I told him and he said that's fine. I was soo drunk at this stage, that i just went straight to bed. This lad is really good friends with one of my flatmates, they've known each other for 9 years (since school) so I'm guessing he probably told him we got pretty intimate. Today was soooo awkward, being around my flatmates, everyone got out of bed really late and I was only with them for about half an hour before they disappeared off to bed. They all said hello to me and smiled to me when they saw me..so no ones been rude to me or anything..I just feel pretty awkward now, especially around the boys because I don't want them to think that this is something which I regularly do at home (because I don't). I know how men can be towards women they percieve as being 'easy' or 'loose' or whatever, and I don't really see myself as being that way, so it's odd coming here and feeling like people might view you completely differently to how they do back home. Also, like about a week ago, we all went out to the same club, but this time with 3 of the people in the flat below us, one of the guys was single, and we ended up bumping and grinding on the dance floor (I was really, really drunk) and I was touching him a lot. Then I ended up going to the toilet, and just passing out in the loo!! Then at about 4am the club bouncers woke me up and told me the club was closed now and that I had to leave. Everyone else had obviously left by this point hours ago, so when I got back to the flat (alone) everyone was in their rooms. They had been looking for me, but my flatmate told me they had assumed I'd probably 'pulled' (gone off with some guy). I told her I passed out in the club, but I don't know if all of them believe me and maybe think I went off with some guy and had a one night stand. So now my flatmates probably think I've had two one night stands within the space of a month. Which I haven't! I just feel really awkward about it all..what are your opinions?
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    Loooooooool

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    I think you're making a big issue of a nothing to be honest, there's nothing wrong with what you did and if you don't want your flatmates to get the wrong impression why don't you just tell them the truth. I doubt they will think it's weird you are a virgin, it really isn't a big deal and people are mature about it at uni.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    So I'm a student at uni at the moment, I'm living in halls, this is my first year and I'm 20 years old. Everyone else in the flat I'm living in (there's 4 of us) are in relationships, I'm the only single one. This is embarrassing to admit but I'm also a virgin. I've been in many situations where I could have had sex but I chose not too, I only want to have sex with someone if I'm attracted to them and (I thought) if I'm in a relationship with them. Also I can be quite a quiet person, especially around men.
    There is so much partying going on at uni, and so many good looking lads, and I have been getting alot of attention from them (not to sound like i'm bragging). It's a bit frustrating when all your flatmates are in relationships and you're the only single one..especially when there's so many good looking male students about.
    So anyway, yesterday evening, one of my flatmates (who's also 20, as are his friends) brought over two of his friends from home (he's from a town about 30 miles away from the uni, my uni is in the north of England btw) both of these lads where really good looking and single, and my age (infact they where a few months older than me), most of the guys here are 18/19 and I'm like one of the few 20 year olds. So we all got completely shattered with alcohol as we where all going out to a club in town, we where all taking shots and we where all really drunk.
    By the time we got to the club, me and one of the lads had starting dancing together/kissing/bumping and grinding etc. So we where touching each other a lot and being pretty intimate. When we got back from the club, he suggested we get into bed, and to be honest, I didn't mind because I've felt (and I know this will sound weird) really sexually frustrated, there are so many good looking men here, and I've come to realise I'll only be young once and I don't want to waste opportunities to have a good time, especially as uni does go by so quickly and everyone says it's the best time of your life. So I was completely okay with getting into bed with him. But all my flat mates (who where also all completely drunk) heard us saying we where going to bed. Anyway, to cut a long story short, we kissed and he ended up (and I know this is gross and probably too much information) fingering me for a bit, before I decided I actually didn't want to have sex that night and didn't feel very comfortable with the idea of it. So I told him and he said that's fine. I was soo drunk at this stage, that i just went straight to bed. This lad is really good friends with one of my flatmates, they've known each other for 9 years (since school) so I'm guessing he probably told him we got pretty intimate. Today was soooo awkward, being around my flatmates, everyone got out of bed really late and I was only with them for about half an hour before they disappeared off to bed. They all said hello to me and smiled to me when they saw me..so no ones been rude to me or anything..I just feel pretty awkward now, especially around the boys because I don't want them to think that this is something which I regularly do at home (because I don't). I know how men can be towards women they percieve as being 'easy' or 'loose' or whatever, and I don't really see myself as being that way, so it's odd coming here and feeling like people might view you completely differently to how they do back home. Also, like about a week ago, we all went out to the same club, but this time with 3 of the people in the flat below us, one of the guys was single, and we ended up bumping and grinding on the dance floor (I was really, really drunk) and I was touching him a lot. Then I ended up going to the toilet, and just passing out in the loo!! Then at about 4am the club bouncers woke me up and told me the club was closed now and that I had to leave. Everyone else had obviously left by this point hours ago, so when I got back to the flat (alone) everyone was in their rooms. They had been looking for me, but my flatmate told me they had assumed I'd probably 'pulled' (gone off with some guy). I told her I passed out in the club, but I don't know if all of them believe me and maybe think I went off with some guy and had a one night stand. So now my flatmates probably think I've had two one night stands within the space of a month. Which I haven't! I just feel really awkward about it all..what are your opinions?
    Honestly, I don't think your flat mates will care that much or judge you. You're single and you are allowed to do what you want. I certainly didn't judge my flat mates when they brought guys back. Whether or not you have sex is a personal decision. You said they smiled at you when you got up so I really don't think they're about to shun you. When you get a little bit more comfortable with them you'll probably discuss how many people you've slept with etc anyway. To be honest, they'll probably be so busy with settling in and making friends that whether you slept with someone or not during freshers week is going to be relatively low on their list of concerns.
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    can't believe they left you in that club.
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    (Original post by kaypc)
    can't believe they left you in that club.
    They'd phoned me about 10 times, and the girl in my flatmate left me two voicemails and texted me asking where I was and that they where all looking for me. I'd locked myself in the toilet cubicle, as embaressingly enough, I was feeling really sick and ended up being ill in there. Then I must have passed out as I only woke up when the bouncers told me it was time to leave. I ended up making a white lie up to my flatmate and told her I'd fallen asleep in the nightclub.
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    *girl in my flat
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    They probably don't care tbh.
    No-one in my flat seems to really care if anyone pulls. Hell, there's one girl who's had about 6 one night stands already and it's only been 3 weeks.
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    It's a non-issue really. I doubt your flatmates care that much. Just enjoy your first year and don't do anything you don't want to do.
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    I couldn't finish reading the post because of the misspelling of the word 'were'. Was giving me a migraine.

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    Mine always assumed I'd been away until all hours with a guy, because I couldn't go out for the first three months so I'd go out to flat parties and stuff on my own instead, and then end up coming home later than them, so they thought I was a right dirty stop-out. :lol: I'm the least experienced person in the flat! Honestly, they probably don't care, and if they do, they need to get over themselves.
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    This story is ****ing tame compared to some of the **** that happened at our halls/stories I've heard.

    I had sex with this girl then found out afterwards that she was known for being a slut at halls. I met her housemate and he told he'd walk into the kitchen and multiple times would just find her bent over the table getting ****ed. I kept her as a **** buddy for a bit and now were friends. Shes ****ing jokes as hell but mental as ****.

    Another girl I know of at pre-drinks during freshers got wasted proceeded to get with the "lad" of the halls. We all left to go to the club as it was obvious they were just going to have sex in the kitchen. When we got back she was up against the wall in the corridor getting ****ed by some other guy.

    OP. University is where you can go a bit mental. If your housemates start treating you differently because of things YOU want to do

    A) **** em. Who cares, I don't have time for grumpy *****. Neither should you.
    B) Jealous as they're in boring relationships during a period of their lives where you SHOULD be experimenting and going a bit mental.

    I was in a relationship for the first half of halls. I completely regret it.
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