My Uncle is 34, doesn't work but is a stay at home dad, good or bad?

My uncle is 34 and has actually never had a proper paid job apart from some volunteer work he did in the past, he drives and has his own car so that will open up job aspects for him I guess if he wanted to find a job.

Anyway he has a 3 year old son and he his girlfriend works as a midwife, she is the main source of income right now as she works and he doesn't, however he does all the housework, takes the baby out, does the shopping when she can't.

is my Uncle a complete layabout or is he actually doing some good whilst being unemployed?

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Reply 1

Welsh_insomniac

He sounds very progressive. A real social norm breaker of his time.

(edited 10 years ago)

Reply 2

GR3YFOXXX

House husband. Totally acceptable. Would you criticise a housewife for doing the same?

Reply 3

ninecrimes

Definitely doing something good. My dad never does anything round the house and he works, whereas my mum is like your uncle and literally does everything but doesn't work. It's not a bad thing, it's actually nice that he does everything.

Reply 4

Bloxorus

This is a good thing as it's breaking the stereotypical housewife trend.

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Reply 5

LolaLowe

she works, he doesn't and he "does the shopping when she can't" ??? he should be doing 100% of the house/child stuff, its just a fair division of labour

Reply 6

IndianDancer

There is nothing wrong with it at all. Good for him for going against the norm. But before I start praising him too much for his progressive attitude I have to say I think its kinda weird how he has never had a proper paid job and is 34. Tells me that he may have some confidence issues when going to find a job. But hey, I'm not judging him and yeah either way good for him for having the guts to go against the norm.

Reply 7

Happy Boy.

Original post by Welsh_insomniac

He sounds very progressive. A real social norm breaker of his time. :rolleyes:

Original post by GR3YFOXXX

House husband. Totally acceptable. Would you criticise a housewife for doing the same?

Original post by ninecrimes

Original post by Bloxorus

This is a good thing as it's breaking the stereotypical housewife trend.

Posted from TSR Mobile

Original post by LolaLowe

she works, he doesn't and he "does the shopping when she can't" ??? he should be doing 100% of the house/child stuff, its just a fair division of labour

thanking you all

Reply 8

MissDavies

I think it makes sense for the partner who earns the least money to be the one to stay at home and look after the children, whether that person is male or female.

Reply 9

lucaf

the only thing I find odd about that is his son would have been born when he was 31 but he has never had a paid job. what had he been doing for a decade before the kid was born?

apart from that I don't see the problem with beng a house husband. if the situations were reversed and it was his girlfriend staying at home while he went out and worked I doubt you would even think twice about it.

Reply 10

Lotus_Eater

Being out of work always makes it harder to get work. Good for him for supporting his family in whatever way he can. Personally it would drive me mad to be at home with a child all day but if it works for him and his wife good luck to them.

Reply 11

Clip

Original post by LolaLowe

she works, he doesn't and he "does the shopping when she can't" ??? he should be doing 100% of the house/child stuff, its just a fair division of labour

Except that if you reverse the situation, and a woman does 100% of the house/child stuff, the man is apparently a chauvinist.

Reply 12

Apocrypha

I disagree, youve said hes never had a job and hes 34, does that mean he was a house husband since he finished school?

In my opinion he does sound a bit lazy, he has a 3 year old son, if hed worked up until his son was born, and then became a house husband, totally acceptable. But he didnt (aside from some volunteer stuff)

Reply 13

Wild Nothing

If your uncle, his son and his girlfriend are happy with it, who are we to comment on whether what he does is good or bad? :tongue:

Reply 14

Ripper-Roo

How stable is their relationship? Only reason I ask is in case they break up, he wouldn't want to be reliant on her. Especially as it could turn nasty if his girlfriend/partner accuses him of being lazy, even though he has brought up their child.

Either way I don't think it really matters if the man or woman is the breadwinner or homemaker. But generally, most men do like to be independent and self-sufficient.

Reply 15

Greenlaner

Nothing wrong with that. A child of that age should have a parent with it (whether it is the mother or father doesn't matter imo). I have never been a fan of parents who simply shove their young kids into day-care everyday while they work, but thats another subject entirely, which I won't get into.

Reply 16

Folion

If the children of a relationship are properly cared for and the family is self reliant financially and not breaking any laws is it actually anybody's business but their own how they want to live their lives?

Reply 17

LolaLowe

Original post by Clip

Except that if you reverse the situation, and a woman does 100% of the house/child stuff, the man is apparently a chauvinist.

to some maybe, but not me. If I worked at my partner didn't then I wouldn't expect to have to shop and clean on my days off, likewise if I was at home with a child all day and my other half was out working I'd make damn sure he didn't have to know where the hoover was or how to work the washing machine!

Reply 18

PinkMobilePhone

Volunteer Team

Why are you so bothered about people's opinions of your uncle? :s-smilie:

Reply 19

A-Dog

What a dick, he should be out there hunting buffalo and defending his offspring and wife from nearby men, whilst his wife forages in the nearby woods for berries and fetches jugs of water from the river.

Apparently men who are stay at home dads have small balls (This is actually a fact, less testosterone, it was on bbc news a few weeks ago)