The Student Room Group

Why is my friend not bothered?

She doesn't seem bothered about anything she always talks quietly and is happy with her job of £80 a week which is fine but today she told me she is 22 wk pregnant and has only just found out about it. She says she went for a night out got drunk and doesn't know what happened but is keeping the baby and her parents are supporting her which is cool. Its just my parents are going on about how her life has gone now and that no lads will be interested in her which is really nasty:mad: The thing is are they right or is what she has done the norm these days? I mean would other girls be bothered by this if they were her or what:confused:
Reply 1
Well, I'm not sure exactly what your main emphasis of this thread is, but if it's "is what she does the norm", then I'd say no. It's more common than ever, and getting scarily more common, but still I'd say it wasn't either the majority case, or socially accepted yet.

Or if it was "will no lads be interested", I'd say (I guess she's about my age, you didn't say) none of my friends or myself would consider dating a girl with a child; at this age we are looking for something fun and leisurely, not having to deal with something like that at all.
Reply 2
King Leigh
Well, I'm not sure exactly what your main emphasis of this thread is, but if it's "is what she does the norm", then I'd say no. It's more common than ever, and getting scarily more common, but still I'd say it wasn't either the majority case, or socially accepted yet.

Or if it was "will no lads be interested", I'd say (I guess she's about my age, you didn't say) none of my friends or myself would consider dating a girl with a child; at this age we are looking for something fun and leisurely, not having to deal with something like that at all.


Ok, well answer how you want but I just wanted to tell someone as I still can't believe shes pregnant. I guess I was mainly asking why she is so laid back about it, I mean if I was her I would at least want to know who the father is!
Reply 3
Maybe it hasn't quite sunk in yet? Or perhaps a lot of her friends are already in a similar boat. 'Expecting' is the wrong word, but maybe she doesn't see it as unusual and has had experience of being around pregnant friends so feels sort of prepared.

Alternatively, she's just scared and feels isolated so is bottling it all up? Offer her a chat maybe, don't be pushy or judgemental, just ask if she wants to talk about it. If she says yes, let her talk at you, just be there. And if she says no, just leave it.
Reply 4
King Leigh
Maybe it hasn't quite sunk in yet? Or perhaps a lot of her friends are already in a similar boat. 'Expecting' is the wrong word, but maybe she doesn't see it as unusual and has had experience of being around pregnant friends so feels sort of prepared.

Alternatively, she's just scared and feels isolated so is bottling it all up? Offer her a chat maybe, don't be pushy or judgemental, just ask if she wants to talk about it. If she says yes, let her talk at you, just be there. And if she says no, just leave it.


Ok thanks, yea come to think of it a few of her friends have been pregnant, at least her parents are supporting her too, I don't know what the point of this is I don't even know why I posted it lol:redface: I suppose im getting some advice on how to help her.:smile:
Reply 5
A) She could be acting like she's not bothered....
B) Meh, It's not abnormal, and its her choice...
How close are you to this friend?

Yea like what the above poster said, OR she could be in denial or something :confused:

Most likely pretending not to care tho. Try to talk to her more, get her to open up. Good luck! :smile: xo
Reply 7
Blithe unconcern it would seem? I'm inclined to think that she's still reeling from the shock, but she could have found out some time ago and have received very strong moral/psychological support from elsewhere while being able to keep the whole issue a secret, temporarily at least. I suppose if you're close/concerned enough, you could (and perhaps should) ask her about it to see how exactly she's coping with the pregnancy.