Reasons a guy would completely ignore his ex girlfriend

Watch
This discussion is closed.
browneyedblonde
Badges: 5
Rep:
?
#1
Report Thread starter 7 years ago
#1
The only ones I can think of are:

1) he is still hurting from the break up and not emotionally ready to deal with his ex.

2) he is testing his ex to see how far she will go in her attempts to contact him if he keeps ignoring her.

3) he has moved on, doesn't care and possibly has another girl so his attention is engaged with her.


It's been 2 months since my ex and I broke up mutually (I initiated it, and he agreed). This was the hardest thing I've ever done because I was completely in love with him. We were together 2 years, and although he liked me a lot, it seemed he definitely wasn't as serious about the relationship as me. He'd repeatedly go days without talking to me even when I had words. I told him he wasn't the one for me and that we are too incompatible. He was like "yeah okay. I get it. Let's stay friends though because I love having you on my life." And didn't say anything else.

I was dealing with the break up okay until 2 weeks ago when I heard he was engaged to his ex-ex from mutual friends. Words can't explain how this news destroyed me so I contacted my ex seeking answers. He responded at first and said the news about the engagement was no true and that he has too much on his plate at the moment to be thinking of engagement. He was polite and said it was good to hear from me but made it clear he didn't want to waffle on about his feelings. I sent him some more texts (a few days apart) over the week but he ignored them. I called him twice yesterday and left a voicemail (I'll admit it was a bit on the emotional side, I didn't cry but I did mention I was finding it hard to let go, but that I'm sure I'll be fine soon) but it has been ignored.

It's clear that he is completely ignoring me so I have decided to stop contacting him now. I'm just wondering why? I know he's my ex and shouldn't have to reply to me but being ignored seems a bit rude/mean. He did say he wanted to stay friends and has always kept in touch with his other ex girlfriends (he even stayed in touch with one who was completely overbearing and clingy and trashed his flat after he broke up with her. He was always on the phone to her trying to make her feel better) so I can't understand why he is completely ignoring me.
1
Padwas
Badges: 3
Rep:
?
#2
Report 7 years ago
#2
He is actually gay
He is a moron
he has decided to change gender
he is undertaking a spiritual journey
2
siamakdie
Badges: 8
Rep:
?
#3
Report 7 years ago
#3
Lol at breaking up with your bf then stalking it him. Women not even once.
2
Kiss
Badges: 2
Rep:
?
#4
Report 7 years ago
#4
(Original post by browneyedblonde)
The only ones I can think of are:

1) he is still hurting from the break up and not emotionally ready to deal with his ex.

2) he is testing his ex to see how far she will go in her attempts to contact him if he keeps ignoring her.

3) he has moved on, doesn't care and possibly has another girl so his attention is engaged with her.


It's been 2 months since my ex and I broke up mutually (I initiated it, and he agreed). This was the hardest thing I've ever done because I was completely in love with him. We were together 2 years, and although he liked me a lot, it seemed he definitely wasn't as serious about the relationship as me. He'd repeatedly go days without talking to me even when I had words. I told him he wasn't the one for me and that we are too incompatible. He was like "yeah okay. I get it. Let's stay friends though because I love having you on my life." And didn't say anything else.

I was dealing with the break up okay until 2 weeks ago when I heard he was engaged to his ex-ex from mutual friends. Words can't explain how this news destroyed me so I contacted my ex seeking answers. He responded at first and said the news about the engagement was no true and that he has too much on his plate at the moment to be thinking of engagement. He was polite and said it was good to hear from me but made it clear he didn't want to waffle on about his feelings. I sent him some more texts (a few days apart) over the week but he ignored them. I called him twice yesterday and left a voicemail (I'll admit it was a bit on the emotional side, I didn't cry but I did mention I was finding it hard to let go, but that I'm sure I'll be fine soon) but it has been ignored.

It's clear that he is completely ignoring me so I have decided to stop contacting him now. I'm just wondering why? I know he's my ex and shouldn't have to reply to me but being ignored seems a bit rude/mean. He did say he wanted to stay friends and has always kept in touch with his other ex girlfriends (he even stayed in touch with one who was completely overbearing and clingy and trashed his flat after he broke up with her. He was always on the phone to her trying to make her feel better) so I can't understand why he is completely ignoring me.
You answered that one for yourself. He has no obligation to be friends with you/stay in contact, and since you broke up with him I don't blame him for wanting to maintain his distance, even if he sounds frigid.
1
thatrollingstone
Badges: 10
Rep:
?
#5
Report 7 years ago
#5
This sounds familiar...
http://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/show....php?t=2513563
0
Aniaa
Badges: 13
Rep:
?
#6
Report 7 years ago
#6
or maybe he just want to show you that you've made a big mistake by breaking up?
1
Over2you
Badges: 10
Rep:
?
#7
Report 7 years ago
#7
You need to get off your high horse. He's moved on. Not all ex's need to be friends and if their not, it doesn't mean they hate each other/still have feelings. Seems to be a prevailing opinion amongst a lot of people.
0
Swanbow
Badges: 19
Rep:
?
#8
Report 7 years ago
#8
Put yourself in his position. Would you still want to keep in contact? I think not.
0
xoxAngel_Kxox
Badges: 21
Rep:
?
#9
Report 7 years ago
#9
You're his ex for a reason, and if you're no longer able to be a couple then perhaps a friendship wouldn't work anyway! I know I'd never be friends with my partner if we weren't a couple (it's hard to explain what I mean) so I don't think it's unusual that when the situation changes he won't want to be in touch anymore.

Sometimes you just have to move on. It's kind of clear that he's trying to.
0
CJKay
Badges: 19
Rep:
?
#10
Report 7 years ago
#10
(Original post by thatrollingstone)
This sounds familiar...
http://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/show....php?t=2513563
Seems legit.
0
Padwas
Badges: 3
Rep:
?
#11
Report 7 years ago
#11
Hey apart from me no one gave reasons
0
jkm2000
Badges: 0
Rep:
?
#12
Report 7 years ago
#12
Don't even know how I got here but I did. As I guy I'm going to be brutally honest, lots of guys are pricks at times. I personally ignored my girlfriend and ex because deep down I enjoyed the control and power. I know it's sick but I honestly don't care. I kept read receipt on iMessage so she would see I've read her messages and on I would purposely not reply. I'm close with a group of like 6 guys and they told me to blank her, even high fived me when I told them I kept read receipt on. Of course I'd never admit this in reality (except with my really close friends) as frankly I'd seem like a **** and everybody thinks I'm such a nice guy. Reality is we're not that nice all of the time and you're best to just move on rather than texting desperate things which he will just see, laugh at and think what an idiot. I think I speak the honest truth.
1
Llamageddon
Badges: 18
Rep:
?
#13
Report 7 years ago
#13
It's standard. Maybe it is because talking to you brings up emotions, maybe he's figured out he just isn't interested in a non-sexual friendship with you, maybe he enjoys the power, maybe he just has better things to do.

Don't try to read it and don't bother asking him.
0
lizlaz350
Badges: 16
Rep:
?
#14
Report 7 years ago
#14
I doubt he's testing you.

He's either not over you and wants distance because of that or he's completely moved on and maybe has a new girlfriend so isn't interested in having you in his life.

If he has a new girlfriend or is back with his ex, regardless of whether they're engaged, she's unlikely to be happy with an ex sniffing round, especially if it's recent and you're not over him.

Back off, if he wants you in his life then he'll come to you. It's perfectly reasonable to not want to stay in contact with your exes though.
0
EonBlueApocalypse
Badges: 13
Rep:
?
#15
Report 7 years ago
#15
How can you expect him to move on if he keeps in contact with you?
0
Ali xo
Badges: 2
Rep:
?
#16
Report 7 years ago
#16
You made him your EX so therefore he has made his EXit from your life..


Posted from TSR Mobile
2
Tiger Rag
Badges: 22
Rep:
?
#17
Report 7 years ago
#17
I would find it odd if an ex did keep in touch. Unless there was kids involved or something.
0
Mohammed Ibrahim
Badges: 0
Rep:
?
#18
Report 7 years ago
#18
Number 3 is for me. Even before I met another girl, I was well over my ex. It was after the phase of being heartbroken, I came to my senses realizing I'll only go into a relationship if I genuinely fell in love with her; and with my ex, I didn't. Then months after months she came onto me, declaring her rights to wanting me back, and I refused. I didn't go for the ******** phase. I just ignored her, waiting for another guy to come along and take her heart. Now we have one offs where we talk, very rarely though. One thing you girls have to understand is don't jump to conclusions and blame someone without knowing the full story.
0
elixira
Badges: 14
Rep:
?
#19
Report 7 years ago
#19
Yeah, sorry but he's moved on. He's not interested. Everyone says they want to stay friends when they break up, because unless something unforgivable has happened, then it's really difficult and horrible to cut someone out of your life completely so agreeing to be friends just makes it a bit less painful. To be honest though you're not acting like a 'friend' either because you're upset about the breakup, the engagement story etc. You cannot be friends when you've still got feelings for them.

When you like someone, are interested, want to keep in contact, you make the effort, you speak to them, make contact, even when you know you 'shouldn't' because they're an ex.

I hope things get easier for you, it is a sucky position
0
Anonymous #1
#20
Report 7 years ago
#20
My ex is doing the same to me. And it's killing me inside.
0
X
new posts
Back
to top
Latest
My Feed

See more of what you like on
The Student Room

You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

Personalise

Poll: What factors affect your mental health most right now? Post-lockdown edition

Anxiousness about restrictions easing (36)
5.61%
Uncertainty around my education (75)
11.68%
Uncertainty around my future career prospects (71)
11.06%
Lack of purpose or motivation (81)
12.62%
Lack of support system (eg. teachers, counsellors, delays in care) (37)
5.76%
Impact lockdown had on physical health (37)
5.76%
Social worries (incl. loneliness/making friends) (68)
10.59%
Financial worries (41)
6.39%
Concern about myself or my loves ones getting/having been ill (26)
4.05%
Exposure to negative news/social media (38)
5.92%
Difficulty accessing real life entertainment (18)
2.8%
Lack of confidence in making big life decisions (62)
9.66%
Worry about missed opportunities during the pandemic (52)
8.1%

Watched Threads

View All
Latest
My Feed