My best friend's boyfriend - this is seriously screwing me up

Okay, this is a fairly long story so please bear with me, because I just don't know what to do.

Me and my best friend met this guy last September, and we became friends with him, and for a while it was just us three as friends. However, my best friend told me that the guy had feelings for me. At the time I fancied someone else and so I didn't have feelings for this guy, but I still flirted with him, just because I think I am naturally flirty.

Things all came to a head at this party in December, where the guy told me he fancied me and he tried to kiss me. I wouldn't kiss him and he apparently got really upset. Then my best friend told me that SHE had feelings for this guy.

But over the past few months I kept seeing him, as friends, and I realised that actually I do really, really fancy him. I thought he still liked me, so two weeks ago I finally worked up the courage to tell him I had made a huge mistake and that I did like him last December. But he was really distant when I told him, which really upset me because I thought he still fancied me. So I didn't tell him that I STILL have feelings for him.

However the next day my best friend told me that she was going out with this guy! They'd been going out for a month, without telling me, but they'd told everyone else. This hurt me quite a bit, but I was happy for her because she had liked him since she met him.

So now I keep seeing him and every time I do, I just like him more. It physically hurts every time I'm reminded that they are together, and I really want to tell somebody about this.

I just want to be able to tell him about my feelings and for him to like me back, like it was last December. I regret that so much. I'm just not sure what to do! Should I be honest with her about this? Or should I keep it to myself?

Thank you so much for any help.

Reply 1

bedbug

14

I'd keep it to myself if it was me, just push any feelings aside. Sure, he may have liked you first but you weren't interested, you had your chance and now they're happy together. They're good friends of yours so you should be happy for them surely?

Reply 2

Dragon24

17

Always want what you can't have so they say. SOMETIMES people only become interesting when the are taken. Maybe you are jealous as he isn't showing you any attention anymore. I think it's best to leave them alone and find someone else. After all you did reject him in the first place.

Reply 3

lazzyfuzzylou

well i think you have to wait until they break up before you tell either of them anything about this. leave it a while after they do, and then tell preferably her first, to check she's okay with it, and then him.

don't do anything while they're going out though. friendships always come first.

Reply 4

Clarence

14

I've been in this situation. You had your chance and you blew it...sorry.

Reply 5

matt@internet

12

Claire8424

Always want what you can't have so they say. SOMETIMES people only become interesting when the are taken. Maybe you are jealous as he isn't showing you any attention anymore. I think it's best to leave them alone and find someone else. After all you did reject him in the first place.

But the OP liked this guy before she new he was taken.
OP I think you should not tell them your feelings for him as they are your friends and are happy together.

Reply 6

Shreerac1

10

Anonymous

Okay, this is a fairly long story so please bear with me, because I just don't know what to do.

Me and my best friend met this guy last September, and we became friends with him, and for a while it was just us three as friends. However, my best friend told me that the guy had feelings for me. At the time I fancied someone else and so I didn't have feelings for this guy, but I still flirted with him, just because I think I am naturally flirty.

Things all came to a head at this party in December, where the guy told me he fancied me and he tried to kiss me. I wouldn't kiss him and he apparently got really upset. Then my best friend told me that SHE had feelings for this guy.

But over the past few months I kept seeing him, as friends, and I realised that actually I do really, really fancy him. I thought he still liked me, so two weeks ago I finally worked up the courage to tell him I had made a huge mistake and that I did like him last December. But he was really distant when I told him, which really upset me because I thought he still fancied me. So I didn't tell him that I STILL have feelings for him.

However the next day my best friend told me that she was going out with this guy! They'd been going out for a month, without telling me, but they'd told everyone else. This hurt me quite a bit, but I was happy for her because she had liked him since she met him.

So now I keep seeing him and every time I do, I just like him more. It physically hurts every time I'm reminded that they are together, and I really want to tell somebody about this.

I just want to be able to tell him about my feelings and for him to like me back, like it was last December. I regret that so much. I'm just not sure what to do! Should I be honest with her about this? Or should I keep it to myself?

Thank you so much for any help.

I left year 7 to get away from stuff like this.