What to do on one year anniversary. Watch

TheReckless
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Hey guys,

So just about ten days from now, it'll be the one year anniversary of my dad's death.
Although he didn't exactly die suddenly (took four weeks), the harsh reality that he was gone is something that I still struggle to deal with now.
As it's approaching the one year mark of his death, I want to do something. Anything.
i've never seen his grave before; I managed to give my mum three grand for his headstone and yet she's banned me from visiting him due to religious reasons, so I can't see him.
But I really, really want to.
I thought I'd bring him some flowers but my very religious auntie told me that's not allowed too.
I'm getting kind of tired of being told what's allowed and what's not allowed; all I want to do is visit my dad and put down some flowers, but that somehow goes against religion.
I'm at a loss in terms of what to do now.
I want to do something special rather than post an emotional, attention-seeking status about him like my other sisters want to do. I just don't know what.
Cheers in advance.
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PinkMobilePhone
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I don't really understand why you wouldn't be allowed to see his grave, or bring flowers. What religion are you / is your family?

How about releasing a balloon or chinese lantern for him in a place that he liked to visit - maybe in a park or somewhere like that?

I'm sorry for your loss.
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TheReckless
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(Original post by PinkMobilePhone)
I don't really understand why you wouldn't be allowed to see his grave, or bring flowers. What religion are you / is your family?

How about releasing a balloon or chinese lantern for him in a place that he liked to visit - maybe in a park or somewhere like that?

I'm sorry for your loss.
My family are Muslims.
And they keep saying it's wrong to visit and bring flowers; it's a "white" thing to do (their words, not mine).
I like the idea of a balloon in a favourite place of his.

And thank you.
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Ggmu!
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I'd ignore them and visit.

It's your father. You should do what you want.

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Hellz_Bellz!
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That's awful, I lost my dad in June and would be distraught if I wasn't allowed to visit where his ashes were interred. I don't know how burials are done in Islam, but isn't there a way you can visit without your family knowing?

I'm really sorry for your loss x
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techno-thriller
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The prophet recommended visting graves, so dont know what your mums on about.
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username1039383
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im the same religion and culture as you (somali) and i find that really strange as my mum and aunties have visited my father's grave many times and im pretty sure its allowed. i'm visiting him soon if Allah wills. visit him
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