Boyfriend living with another girl.. Watch

poppy_u
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My boyfriend is just sorting out his student house for next year. He's living with two other boys and six girls, but when he looked at the term start dates next year it turns out both him and one of the girls start a month before everyone else gets there as they're both medics.

He's good friends with this girl, and this will mean they'll be living alone together for a month. Girls would you be worried about this?? I trust him, but I still think it's going to be weird for me at the time..I can't help but worry that it's be so easy for something to happen when they're both there alone. What does everyone think?




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username91207
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It depends how much you trust him. I know I'd worry a bit, but personally that's just because of my own insecurity - my boyfriend is entirely trustworthy.

Can you go and visit him in that month? Get to know the girl? That might put your mind at ease a bit.
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poppy_u
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(Original post by snowyowl)
It depends how much you trust him. I know I'd worry a bit, but personally that's just because of my own insecurity - my boyfriend is entirely trustworthy.

Can you go and visit him in that month? Get to know the girl? That might put your mind at ease a bit.
Yeah I do trust him completely, but I just think it's a weird situation to be in! Yeah I should be able to go and visit, but he's five hours away when in uni, so it's not practical for me to make too many trips in the month. I have met the girl briefly, but I guess it would make it easier if I got to know her more when I next visit! Or possibly make me even more worried..


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russellsteapot
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Putting a man and a woman in a house together doesn't mean they're going to sleep together.

Isn't really much you can do beyond trusting him, in all honesty I'm sure if he was going to cheat on you, and he and this girl had sufficient mutual attraction (which they probably don't, based entirely on averages) he'd have already done so.

You could become mad untrusting girlfriend and keep turning up at the house unannounced all month, but really I'm sure it'll be fine. It's the kind of thing that simply requires trust and perspective. Think of how often you've been alone with a gentleman and haven't slept with him. Obviously do whatever you can to make yourself feel better about it; the odd visit wouldn't be a bad thing, getting to know her (from a non-interrogatory point), etc. But really, isn't much else to do but trust him to be relatively normal.
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Psyk
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I lived with some women for 4 years at uni. Didn't sleep with any of them.

Had a friend who lived in a house with 7 girls (he was the only guy) one year. He didn't sleep with any of them.

It's possible for men and women to live together without having sex.
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ilex_noemi
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(Original post by Psyk)
I lived with some women for 4 years at uni. Didn't sleep with any of them.

Had a friend who lived in a house with 7 girls (he was the only guy) one year. He didn't sleep with any of them.

It's possible for men and women to live together without having sex.
1 man and 7 girls!? :eek: I couldn't take being his girlfriend to be honest lol my insecurities would be going mad!!


There isn't really much that you can do but trust him.
Your boyfriend could cheat regardless of living with her, if he was going to cheat then he would have. You just have to trust him.
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nixonsjellybeans
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Have some trust in us guys for once I'm pretty much the guy you described and I haven't and won't sleep with any of the girls I live with because they're just friends. I'm fed up of being judged by my OH who instantly assumes I 'want' these girls just because I live with them.
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Ferrus
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(Original post by nixonsjellybeans)
Have some trust in us guys for once I'm pretty much the guy you described and I haven't and won't sleep with any of the girls I live with because I can't.
Unwritten subtext.
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nixonsjellybeans
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(Original post by Ferrus)
Unwritten subtext.
Can't or won't?

I won't because i'm taken and its pointless.
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theorangebox
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I think how likely someone is to cheat is almost entirely unrelated to how much opportunity they have.
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panthérenoir
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(Original post by poppy_u)
My boyfriend is just sorting out his student house for next year. He's living with two other boys and six girls, but when he looked at the term start dates next year it turns out both him and one of the girls start a month before everyone else gets there as they're both medics.

He's good friends with this girl, and this will mean they'll be living alone together for a month. Girls would you be worried about this?? I trust him, but I still think it's going to be weird for me at the time..I can't help but worry that it's be so easy for something to happen when they're both there alone. What does everyone think?




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I would definitely be worried. I mean he may not do anything but while they're living together he will probably be thinking 'i'm not gonna do anything', 'i'm alone with *insert name*'. It won't be as awkward since they're good friends so idk it could get cosy even if nothing happens
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buchanan700
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If he's going to cheat he's going to do it whether he's living with a girl or not.
Trust is the only thing that can make this work and this is such a non-issue imho. My house-mate is a bloke and he lives with me and two other girls.
So just accept this and move on. Or don't, and watch the relationship burst in to a ball of flames.
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Spongebob'sPants
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One solution would be to spend all your time there with him during that month.

Or better still, to move in for the month.

The 3 of you could be best buddies.
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poppy_u
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Okay thanks guys. I trust him not to cheat, but it's just going to be weird for me thinking that every night they're the only ones in the house..

Staying with him then isn't an option as ill be starting uni myself.

I don't want to be an over protective girlfriend but I just can't help worrying about it. Its just the thought of them going back to the house every night I know that if the roles were reversed he would be very vocal about it, but I try and be the trusting one




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Hal.E.Lujah
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Just because you live with someone doesn't make you automatically going to sleep with them :lol:


If anything it'd make it less likely, why make things so awkward.
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Treeroy
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(Original post by poppy_u)
My boyfriend is just sorting out his student house for next year. He's living with two other boys and six girls, but when he looked at the term start dates next year it turns out both him and one of the girls start a month before everyone else gets there as they're both medics.

He's good friends with this girl, and this will mean they'll be living alone together for a month. Girls would you be worried about this?? I trust him, but I still think it's going to be weird for me at the time..I can't help but worry that it's be so easy for something to happen when they're both there alone. What does everyone think?
Think of this way - if you were living with another guy for a month, would you do anything? Would you think your boyfriend should be worried?

Me personally, yes I would be worried if my boyfriend was in that situation, but that wouldn't mean I was actually being reasonable about it. Either way you have to deal with it somehow.
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