Male 24 and suffered with a long term Anxiety Problem - Please help Watch

Anonymous #1
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Report Thread starter 5 years ago
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I am male, 24 and was writing posts exactly like this 5 years ago about similar issues.


Since my anxiety arose a while ago I've been on a range of medications and attended various counselling/therapy session and I am currently receiving CBT + Cipralex.(SSRI 10mg). In addition to my therapy and meds I also eat healthily, try to exercise 5 times a week and get at least 8 hours of sleep, although this generally helps my health, it does not relieve my anxiety/low state of mind all that much.


I started a full time job as a medical laboratory assistant 2 months ago in the NHS which I find very challenging, some parts of the job are ok, but my anxiety is a constant burden during each 8 hour working day, and I really hope I will one day not feel this great turmoil. Before this job I pretty much lived a solitary lifestyle, but left my house on a daily basis to either go into town, walk the dog, go running or get the train to a busier place, however this was all done alone as I literally haven't had a social life since my anxiety began all those years ago.


After work I usually come home, eat my dinner, watch TV, prepare my clothes and dinner for the following working day, go for a run and then sleep, this is my life. During the weekends I usually go out for a bit, play xbox, walk the dog, exercise but I am always on my own, I have been in this routine for many years and feel I might always be.


being 24 and feeling as though I've never lived and been through so many bad times over the past several years I really want to make a positive change and do/attain some things which I desire such as a group of friends, girlfriend/family, saved money, experience travelling and a generally much more stable life mentally, I'd also like to go to the gym and build a better body for myself.


I'd appreciate anyone's thoughts and input on this and I will take your honest advice constructively


Many thanks
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Scoobster
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10mg of Cipralex/Escitalopram is quite a small dose - how long have you been taking it?

Medicationally (yeah I just made that word up..!) speaking you're not taking much so you do have room to try increase either the dose, or try another medication. Have you tried other anti-anxiety medications such as beta-blockers? What are your thoughts on using medication?

Do you feel that the counseling helps? I never found it useful with anyone I tried with in the past. I see a psychiatrist and although it's not counseling per say, we do talk a lot and I think he's incredibly good at analysing my life. I've never found that connection with anyone else and it's so incredibly important to have that, so if you don't think you're clicking with whoever you're seeing now - change.

You seem to lead quite a balanced lifestyle which is good, perhaps a little bit socially withdrawn though?

Are you happy in your job? You said it's quite challenging and that your anxiety is a burden, but can you explain that a little more? Although you've touched on it, you've not really described in what aspect your anxiety interferes with your life. How does it stop you from living how you want to live? What do you feel you've lost from having it?

I'll be honest, from your initial post, you seem to be coping pretty well. Other people on this forum have needed to be drugged to death with high doses of potent SSRI's, Benzodiazepines and Atypical Anti-psychotics in order to control their anxiety, to the point where they cannot function. They can't sleep, can't eat, can't think etc... So I think you have to give yourself way more credit than you already are
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Spring24
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I am male, 24 and was writing posts exactly like this 5 years ago about similar issues.


Since my anxiety arose a while ago I've been on a range of medications and attended various counselling/therapy session and I am currently receiving CBT + Cipralex.(SSRI 10mg). In addition to my therapy and meds I also eat healthily, try to exercise 5 times a week and get at least 8 hours of sleep, although this generally helps my health, it does not relieve my anxiety/low state of mind all that much.


I started a full time job as a medical laboratory assistant 2 months ago in the NHS which I find very challenging, some parts of the job are ok, but my anxiety is a constant burden during each 8 hour working day, and I really hope I will one day not feel this great turmoil. Before this job I pretty much lived a solitary lifestyle, but left my house on a daily basis to either go into town, walk the dog, go running or get the train to a busier place, however this was all done alone as I literally haven't had a social life since my anxiety began all those years ago.


After work I usually come home, eat my dinner, watch TV, prepare my clothes and dinner for the following working day, go for a run and then sleep, this is my life. During the weekends I usually go out for a bit, play xbox, walk the dog, exercise but I am always on my own, I have been in this routine for many years and feel I might always be.


being 24 and feeling as though I've never lived and been through so many bad times over the past several years I really want to make a positive change and do/attain some things which I desire such as a group of friends, girlfriend/family, saved money, experience travelling and a generally much more stable life mentally, I'd also like to go to the gym and build a better body for myself.


I'd appreciate anyone's thoughts and input on this and I will take your honest advice constructively


Many thanks
It seems to me that this anxiety of yours has continued for a long time. I think your method of finding that cure is slow, however it's effective. It may take you years and years to actually see a result from everything you're doing hopefully a positive one.

For some its not easy to just get rid of anxiety, I understand that for some it may stop for a long time and then suddenly the cycle of battling it starts all over again. Generally you seem to have a good healthy lifestyle in terms of staying active, but it seems like what you're missing here is more interaction. I think your isolation & loneliness might have been a triggering factor as to why you still have anxiety, if not at least did have a minor effect.

Are you happy with your job? is it stressful for you? and most importantly have you settled down at work properly or are you constantly having to prove your abilities to everyone at work? or are you feeling left out?

It feels like your lifestyle is a constant repetition for you and it has also bored you somehow, maybe you were looking for a more 'new' you since you felt like you've done the same things years ago, with time you thought perhaps that it would pass but it didn't and it can be the reason as to why you feel you've never lived your life truly.
Reflecting on your past yet you still somehow would like to see the change being made in your life, I can see that.

It also depends on what is causing this anxiety. It could be an anxiety created due to the lack of the interaction and the continues desires you have for wanting a change. It could be from the past following you around until now. I don't know

TBH, I think you've done remarkable well through all these years, and you've even bettered your life by recognising your needs taking action towards them e.g. therapy, medicine. You should be proud of yourself of how you've slowly battled this and still battling it in this journey. For you it will take time, but you need more interaction in your life.
There is so many goals you've set for yourself, but for now I think you're just halfway through reaching them fully. Also, you need to do things you enjoy more to make you forget about those past moments e.g. take time out and engage in hobbies/interests, travel etc. Because you're worth it!, and don't be shy about it, if you need someone you can contact me. I'll help you my pleasure.
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Hello. I suffered anxiety for years but now I don't, so please take some heart form the fact it can be beaten. When it comes to ANY mental health issue, it's very common to either a) medicate and b) see a counsellor/therapist. I note you're seeing a CBT therapist which is what I am ultimately going to advocate here for you.

Medication for anxiety is a treatment, sure, but not a solution or cure for long-term anxiety. Similar to if you have a broken leg, you could technically take massive doses of morphine to take the pain away but that isn't going to fix your broken leg. A cast and resetting it will. As anxiety is cognitive, then you need to work on your thinking. This is where CBT works - if done properly. Perhaps, as someone mentioned earlier, you need to change your therapist. CBT = Thoughts > Feelings > Behaviours. Your thoughts are leading to feeling anxiety and then you shy away from stuff or avoid things. What is it that you're thinking that is making you feel anxious. What negative core beliefs do you have that make your feel this way? Remember negative core beliefs (and we all have them) aren't true. For example, many people think they're unlovable, a failure, pathetic or just not worthy. These thoughts have stemmed from OTHER people, Interactions with friends, parents, teachers, society in general. We have expectations and we have criticisms - we are our own worst critics too remember. All it takes is our parents to maybe have ignored us a few times as children, a teacher (who has a hangover) telling us to stop being stupid, a time when we might have lost or failed an exam perhaps when young (or things never turned out how we expected them too), then being in a crowd when other people maybe have laughed at something we were wearing as kids and boom: suddenly we feel we aren't worthy, unloveable, a failure and useless. But you never chose for these other people to react like that, were a victim of circumstance and perhaps just hung out with the wrong people. OTHER people and society have made you feel like this and this stuff sticks around with us. It forms our NEGATIVE beliefs about yourself and they're simply untrue. Of course we're all loveable, worthy and not useless and not doing something right isn't failure - it's learning. We just feel we are all these negative things. And this sort of stuff sticks around for ever until we treat it properlyt - i.e. work on our thoughts and realise that everything we feel about ourselves is - in general - wrong. Of course the same goes for the opposite - people who have large egos. They are no better than anyone else, they JUST THINK THEY ARE - because of circumstances, environment and people and perhaps mollycoddling. Anyway, stick with the CBT and it'll work over a couple of years, and use the medication to alleviate the acute symptoms. All the best.
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And, the reason I talked about the unworthy, unloveable, failure aspect is that EVERYONE who has anxiety has this deep inside them - it's the cause, a sort of non-contentment if you will, stemming from this. You may not be aware of it, and this is exactly what's causing the anxiety - you know something's wrong but don't know quite what.
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