Why did my girlfriend say this? Watch

Anonymous #1
#1
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This will sound like a stupid question probably but it is really bugging me. I am 25 and she is 22.

Today my girlfriend (of 10 months) told me that she feels jealous that her ex has a better job than her. She mistook 'Barista' in Costa for the legal kind, assuming he had a job in law. I told her that it means he works serving coffee. This pleased her and she said ''I am happy that he went to uni and has a worse job than me lol''.

Now most people would not think twice of this, but why has she been even thinking alone those lines? Why does she care? It's just worrying me though I know it's probably nothing at all, as I worry too much!
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SoftPunch
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(Original post by Anonymous)
This will sound like a stupid question probably but it is really bugging me. I am 25 and she is 22.

Today my girlfriend (of 10 months) told me that she feels jealous that her ex has a better job than her. She mistook 'Barista' in Costa for the legal kind, assuming he had a job in law. I told her that it means he works serving coffee. This pleased her and she said ''I am happy that he went to uni and has a worse job than me lol''.

Now most people would not think twice of this, but why has she been even thinking alone those lines? Why does she care? It's just worrying me though I know it's probably nothing at all, as I worry too much!
Competition.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by SoftPunch)
Competition.
Competition between her and him? But why? Because she still likes him? or competition she wants to create between me and making me jealous or something?
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shezshez
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(Original post by Anonymous)
She mistook 'Barista' in Costa for the legal kind, assuming he had a job in law. I told her that it means he works serving coffee. This pleased her and she said ''I am happy that he went to uni and has a worse job than me lol''.
Why are you with someone who uses the word 'lol' in normal speech?
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willbee
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Maybe she regrets not going to uni? Or maybe she thinks it means his going to uni was a waste of time, as in he has wasted his time and she hasn't.

Or she's immature and vindictive, and a bit of an idiot for confusing barista and barrister.

You know her better than we do. But people often feel a swell of happiness when someone they believe has wronged them gets their 'comeuppance', it doesn't make them bad for feeling that justice has been served.
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SoftPunch
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Competition between her and him? But why? Because she still likes him? or competition she wants to create between me and making me jealous or something?
Competition in which she is the only participant.
She maybe doesn't like him, but still thinks about him - in terms of she is trying to prove/show to him that her life is so much better than his and trying to show him what he missed.
My guess.
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Cashmee
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Your gf is someone that enjoys the suffering of others as amusement. e.g If someone that I dislike I would enjoy watching him/her getting pwned, put down, humiliated, destoryed and fall into despair.
Humans are selfish my friend, there is quite a lot of hate in the world today.
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IlexBlue
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It means you need to get a smarter girlfriend.
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Lavedog
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schadenfreude
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IlexBlue
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(Original post by Cashmee)
Your gf is someone that enjoys the suffering of others as amusement. e.g If someone that I dislike I would enjoy watching him/her getting pwned, put down, humiliated, destoryed and fall into despair.
Humans are selfish my friend, there is quite a lot of hate in the world today.
Okay, it's not a CEO position, but calling working at Costa "suffering, humiliation and falling into into despair" is a bit harsh.
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SoftPunch
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(Original post by IlexBlue)
It means you need to get a smarter girlfriend.
You wanna be that substitute? :perv:
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MissDavies
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It's petty, but a lot of people like to think that their life is better than their ex's. Especially if the break-up was nasty, it's a bit like being pleased when you find out that the girl who bullied you in school is doing badly whilst you're doing well. It rarely means there are feelings still involved, some people are just very competitive by nature.
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Cashmee
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(Original post by IlexBlue)
Okay, it's not a CEO position, but I'd calling working at Costa "suffering, humiliation and falling into into despair" is a bit harsh.
Well you never know, some girls do hold a grudge against some people for a life time. Maybe that is what she is thinking/wishes. who knows? :rolleyes:
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IlexBlue
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(Original post by SoftPunch)
You wanna be that substitute? :perv:
I'm a lone wolf, riding the wild moors beneath the moon at night with only the wind as my guide. :cool:
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SoftPunch
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(Original post by IlexBlue)
I'm a lone wolf, riding the wild moors beneath the moon at night with only the wind as my guide. :cool:
Ah, independent blue woman needs no one
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ilex_noemi
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My ex keeps failing uni and is repeating his 3rd year for the 3rd time when he's doing an easy degree! That makes me feel kind of good that he's a failure and I got away from that lol I find it funny after what he made me go through (lies & cheating etc), it's not that I still like him.

Mind you, if he was doing well for himself then I wouldn't care at all.. good for him getting on with life, I just would of had less laughs about it lol but it wouldn't bother me.

If she really cares that he is doing better then perhaps there are still some feelings.. It's hard to tell
Or perhaps she is just determined to be better than her past? That isn't a bad thing
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Lotus_Eater
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Well if she didn't go to Uni (which is the implication of what she said) then it might be that he left her when he went off to study and she feels a sense of satisfaction that life hasn't served him endless glasses of lemonade.

Which isn't the noblest of thoughts but not one you can begrudge her for.
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Maestrok
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It makes them feel better that they are doing better than their ex. Its the same i guess when you see your enemies fail
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Mel1215
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(Original post by Anonymous)
This will sound like a stupid question probably but it is really bugging me. I am 25 and she is 22.

Today my girlfriend (of 10 months) told me that she feels jealous that her ex has a better job than her. She mistook 'Barista' in Costa for the legal kind, assuming he had a job in law. I told her that it means he works serving coffee. This pleased her and she said ''I am happy that he went to uni and has a worse job than me lol''.

Now most people would not think twice of this, but why has she been even thinking alone those lines? Why does she care? It's just worrying me though I know it's probably nothing at all, as I worry too much!
She probably wants to see him fail because they aren't together no more and is clearly bitter about him. Seeing as you've been in a relationship for 10 months I would be concerned too because she should be well intruly over her ex.
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Orthonym
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It's like some people who feel good when they see their ex with his new girlfriend who is not very attractive. It can feel good even though physical attractiveness doesn't define who is a better person.

If she was upset when she thought her ex was very successful, it suggests she is upset that he is so happy without her. She likes to think that she is right to not be with him and her life is so much better than his, she is better than him, ect. If she still liked him, she would want him to be successful.
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