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    Ok so on nights out i do find myself having fun, (with the group of people that i go with) however should there be a really attractive girl i notice i'll be dancing around talking to her for ages, and just when i manage to get the confidence to go over, we either move to another bar or she leave or something else happens. I can not use alcohol to bridge that gap, i am still fighting depression and although it's not bad, i did kind of use it as a distraction last year, i was by no means an alcoholic but as i was using it as a distraction, my brain has linked getting drunk to those dark moments, which is why i VERY rarely get drunk or even drink, i only drink on nights out now

    So considering the normal method is out of the window, i don't know what else i can do

    i'm 21 btw
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    ok so actually you have an advantage already... your not a drunk idiot that just goes over to girls and acts cocky or to forward in your face towards them. so use it to your advantage. if you spot a pretty girl go over to her normally so she can see that your not drunk and ask her say if she wants to dance if she says yes then get to know her and start by saying you look nice and show an interest in her. it is loud so it would be harder to hear. if she says no don't take it to heart, try someone else later, one is bound to say yes. once you have danced then offer her a drink and find somewhere to chat more.
    have no shame in being turned down because there is always a constant flow of people. and if your friends want to leave you should arrange for something to happen so that if someone is with a girl then you split or something so that you don't have to leave and others can move on, or something like that
    hope this helps x
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    (Original post by Abigail Tompsett)
    ok so actually you have an advantage already... your not a drunk idiot that just goes over to girls and acts cocky or to forward in your face towards them. so use it to your advantage. if you spot a pretty girl go over to her normally so she can see that your not drunk and ask her say if she wants to dance if she says yes then get to know her and start by saying you look nice and show an interest in her. it is loud so it would be harder to hear. if she says no don't take it to heart, try someone else later, one is bound to say yes. once you have danced then offer her a drink and find somewhere to chat more.
    have no shame in being turned down because there is always a constant flow of people. and if your friends want to leave you should arrange for something to happen so that if someone is with a girl then you split or something so that you don't have to leave and others can move on, or something like that
    hope this helps x
    Forgot to add that my "dancing" isn't club dancing, club dancing to me isn't proper dancing, proper dancing is like ballroom (i actually take Salsa lessons) but i lack confidence to go to girls in clubs (as they are ALWAYS surronded by people and guys who look better than i do; what chance do i have against guys like that)
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Forgot to add that my "dancing" isn't club dancing, club dancing to me isn't proper dancing, proper dancing is like ballroom (i actually take Salsa lessons) but i lack confidence to go to girls in clubs (as they are ALWAYS surronded by people and guys who look better than i do; what chance do i have against guys like that)

    really??? that is soo cooool! ive been wanting to take salsa lessons thats really cool i would totally use that and ask her to dance but say u want to teach her some salsa moves, i would think that was awesome...
    yea i see your trouble with the other guys... if you dont mind me asking what do you look like, describe yourself... if you want to...
    i would also go for girls that dont have loads of men around her, maybe one that hs just arrived or has been sitting at the bar for a while, just be alert...
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    (Original post by Abigail Tompsett)
    really??? that is soo cooool! ive been wanting to take salsa lessons thats really cool i would totally use that and ask her to dance but say u want to teach her some salsa moves, i would think that was awesome...
    yea i see your trouble with the other guys... if you dont mind me asking what do you look like, describe yourself... if you want to...
    i would also go for girls that dont have loads of men around her, maybe one that hs just arrived or has been sitting at the bar for a while, just be alert...
    I would say i'm your run of the mill geek, average height, lean body, some noticeable muscle. young face (still get mistaken for a freshers despite the fact i'm a 3rd year uni student), i can send a photo
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Ok so on nights out i do find myself having fun, (with the group of people that i go with) however should there be a really attractive girl i notice i'll be dancing around talking to her for ages, and just when i manage to get the confidence to go over, we either move to another bar or she leave or something else happens. I can not use alcohol to bridge that gap, i am still fighting depression and although it's not bad, i did kind of use it as a distraction last year, i was by no means an alcoholic but as i was using it as a distraction, my brain has linked getting drunk to those dark moments, which is why i VERY rarely get drunk or even drink, i only drink on nights out now

    So considering the normal method is out of the window, i don't know what else i can do

    i'm 21 btw
    I learnt magic and I am now a member of the magic circle but its a good ice breaker at house parties etc but be careful not to over do it or else you'll get known to do it too much and that can push people away too so maybe learn 3 cool tricks and then ask them their name and what they do.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I would say i'm your run of the mill geek, average height, lean body, some noticeable muscle. young face (still get mistaken for a freshers despite the fact i'm a 3rd year uni student), i can send a photo
    aha awww how u gonna send a photo?
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    (Original post by Abigail Tompsett)
    aha awww how u gonna send a photo?
    Just cos i'm posting anon doesn't mean i can't send you photo via a PM
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    Sort out your depression first...
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Just cos i'm posting anon doesn't mean i can't send you photo via a PM
    oh ok i didnt realise u can do that... ok if u like
 
 
 
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