I think I fancy my best friend. Help? Watch

Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 5 years ago
#1
SO yeah, that.

I have spent a lot of time and effort defining our relationship because so many people have stirred about us fancying each other. I have told him at least 10 times that I straight up did not fancy him. And I meant it.

But then when I least expected it, the feelings hit. And know we are still best friends. But a lot of viable sources told me he, at least, used to fancy me. And he has told me he think I am beautiful. But we also have loads of conversations about how we are JUST FRIENDS. But now I don't know what to do.

Do I tell him? Do I wait and hope the feelings go away? Do I just sit and hope he asks me out despite the fact I have told him in clear terms I didn't fancy him?

Help.
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tory88
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#2
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It's a tough one, and not something people can tell you what to do with. I'd say wait a little while, check that the feelings aren't just a passing crush or something fleeting, but then if they seem genuine and longlasting think about telling him. The risk is that it makes the friendship awkward, or possibly even ends it, but the reward is a possible relationship that would make you both much happier. Only you can decide whether the benefits outweigh the risks, but in most cases I would say tell him.
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nguyenj
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It's hard to say, but my advice would be to just tell him. But don't just say that you like him, make sure he knows and make sure you tell him that you are uncertain of your feelings. Tell him that you're not sure whether this is just some phase, or that you genuinely do like him.

Don't wait for it to be too late. Make sure things are clear between the both of you in your relationship.

Yeah, it may be a risk to your relationship considering you're best friends, but think about it. Is this a risk worth taking? He could potentially still feel the same way as before, and you could both be happy together. However, again there are problems if he does not feel the same way anymore, you may be risking your friendship.

The truth is the best advice right now. It's something that people don't often admit to, but should. It's so important in relationships, and you'll feel a lot better because then there will be less "if only" and "maybe" kind of thoughts and questions.

Good luck and take care.
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hrtbrkn23
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#4
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Sounds like me and my bestfriend. There was such strong attraction between us that I thought he liked me too so I ended up telling him. Thing is he said he doesn't feel the same way and that I am just a friend and he values me so much he doesn't want that to change. So I guess it depends how strong your friendship is to start with. We're still bestfriends and nothing has really changed in out relationship.

It may be hard and also depends what you want out of it but there's only one way to find out. So good luck!
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Jjj90
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Oh god. I've been through this. I fancied my best friend, I am not exaggerating when I say it is one of the worst things that has ever happened to me, I lost a best friend, I crashed into severe depression.

I'm not saying don't go for it... but it is a huge risk I think.
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Coral Reafs
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get som1 to ask if he likes u bak, but dont make it obvious u asked them to ask him.

then hope for the best

watever happens good luck, dont lose a bestfriend in the process
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TheGirlNextDoor
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(Original post by Anonymous)
SO yeah, that.

I have spent a lot of time and effort defining our relationship because so many people have stirred about us fancying each other. I have told him at least 10 times that I straight up did not fancy him. And I meant it.

But then when I least expected it, the feelings hit. And know we are still best friends. But a lot of viable sources told me he, at least, used to fancy me. And he has told me he think I am beautiful. But we also have loads of conversations about how we are JUST FRIENDS. But now I don't know what to do.

Do I tell him? Do I wait and hope the feelings go away? Do I just sit and hope he asks me out despite the fact I have told him in clear terms I didn't fancy him?

Help.
I would say, if you think you can still be best friends no matter the outcome (whether you both date or not) then go for it...

If there's a chance you can get over it and you think he doesn't like you back then try to get over it because it's better than losing your best friend.

Just don't do anything that'll mean you'll lose him as your best friend because that'll really ruin you, as Jjj90 said.
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demiroux
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#8
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Hey!
Okay, i must say i truly believe this is Infatuation (A Passing Crush).
You've told him loads of times you're just friends so you're mind is most likely playing the "What If?" game with you.
What if I like him?
What if he likes me?
What if i kissed him?
What if we just had sex?
What if i have his baby?
What if I got him unconscious and then took him on a trip to Alaska where i proposed?
Lol.
I truly feel you should wait. If it stays then it extremely genuine as if you're best friends, you know almost everything about him and your heart is finally saying it's ready.

Goodluck!
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