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    After the success of my American detective thriller Death and the Pumpkins i have begun work on the sequel: the provisional title is The Cheerleader's Tale...

    Here is the beginning:

    It contains adult themes. And shagging.

    ******************************** ******************************** ******************************** ******

    Jessica Sharpe gazed out of her lakeside condo. Lake Wachimichee glittered peacefully in the late October sunshine.The scarlet leaves of the maple tree were starting to fall on the manicured lawn. Soon it would be Hallowe'en and then Thanksgiving.

    Life in Cutter's Creek was slowly returning to normal after the horrific events of the previous year. Three of Jessica's classmates had been executed by a respected member of their township. It seemed as if the close knit community had been thrust into some sensational crime novel, but this was tragically real.

    Jessica had not really like Katie Bellingham, the only female victim. Katie had been a real ball-breaker to the other members of the cheerleading team. It was only because her Pop was the wrestling coach that she had been allowed to remain in the squad. None of the other girls had said anything bad about her since the murder, but there was an unspoken feeling of relief that they would never hear her whining *****y voice again.

    Jessica heard the bedroom door opening. She heard heavy footsteps approaching. Suddenly she felt rough male hands over her face...

    "I'm home honey !!" said her partner Dwayne.

    Dwayne was the younger brother of Duke Kawinski, the giant quarterback who had been slain alongside Katie the previous year.

    Dwayne was not as husky as Duke; he was more of a surfer than a football jock. Jessica loved to run her fingers through his sun-bleached locks before impaling herself on his mighty appendage.

    "I was wondering what we should wear for Hallowe'en this year babes ?" he enquired.

    Jessica shuddered inwardly at the thought of celebrating the darkness when their community had faced the reality of evil in its foulest manifestations. Dwayne could be a real jerk sometimes...

    "I don't know honey. Maybe we are too old for trick or treating now ?"

    "Hey don't be such a sourpuss Jess... it's always a great craic... it is a real community event".

    Dwayne had an annoying habit of using Irish slang despite his family being originally from Lublin rather than Dublin.

    Maybe Dwayne had a point. Life had to go on despite the appalling tragedy. Perhaps they should make a special effort this year.

    Jessica was still able to fit into the clothes she had worn as a sixth grader. She had several Hallowe'en outfits at the back of her closet which would pass muster.

    As if reading her thoughts Dwayne said "You really need something new this year... i will pay for whatever you want."

    Dwayne had various faults but miserliness was not one of them. Jessica knew that she only had to look admiringly at an item in a catalog or a storefront window and he would buy it for her.

    "I was thinking maybe an Oirish theme this time... you could be a, like, innocent Colleen, and i a wicked leprechaun, to be sure "

    Jessica burst out laughing at the image in her mind. Dwayne joined in and soon they were rolling on the floor, their youthful bodies joined in an enthusiastic shagathon.

    They did not notice the flash of sunlight on a military grade achromatic lens trained on their bedroom from the hillside six hundred metres away.
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    *grabs popcorn*
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    Jed Mullins was to all appearances a rough no-nonsense cowpoke; he earned his living herding steers and breaking mustangs for the local ranchers. He was very popular with the ranchers' wives.
    He squinted down the barrel of his camouflaged equipment which was trained on the upscale condo where Jessica and Dwayne were blissfully fornicating.
    Jed had a secret. He knew that if his secret passion was revealed his life in Cutter's Creek would be over.

    Jed was an Ornithologist....

    He trembled with excitement as he adjusted the knurled focus knob on his telescope. The image came sharply into view. Yes, it was definitely Myioborus pictus... the rare Painted Redstart. At first glance Jed had mistaken it for Setophaga ruticilla the American Redstart... but something niggled at the back of his mind... surely Setophaga ruticilla had a yellow belly, whereas this little guy was definitely scarlet red.
    The little bird perched nonchalantly on the windowsill of Jessica's apartment. It seemed to be watching the antics of the shagging couple with wry interest...

    Suddenly Jed heard the unmistakeable sound of a man approaching. He barely had time to hide his field notebook and copy of Migratory Birds of the Mississippi Delta in his khaki fannypack before the familiar face of Don Gibson peered round the trunk of the nearest Sumac tree.

    "Howdy pardner... how's it hanging ?" enquired the gnarled stockman. He and Jed were both working at the Double D ranch a few miles out of town. Don had no idea that Jed was an Ornithologist and Jed had no intention of letting him find out.
    "Great to see you buddy !! I am scoping out that hot Cheerleader from Fillingham High... she is putting out with that surfer dweeb Kawinski... here have a look..."

    Don needed no further encouragement and was soon enjoying a ringside view through the window of Jessica's dwelling. "Hehehe that chick sure can ball " he said, his voice growing hoarse and ragged as he watched the shagathon.

    "Reckon we should get ourselves some pussy too buddy !!" suggested Don, clearly excited by the view down the telescope.
    "Hell yeah" agreed Jed, dismayed that his birding trip was being so roughly curtailed. "Let's head to the truckstop and pick up some hitchhikers...you go on ahead pardner and i will catch you up " he said.
    Don adjusted his pants and shambled off down the track which led to the mining road where their SUVs were parked up.
    Jed quickly adjusted the telescope ...yes the little Redstart was still on the windowsill. It turned its head towards him and seemed to wink roguishly before flying away over the maple tree.
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    The truckstop café was a popular hangout for the drifters and stoners of Cutter's Creek. Grizzled truckers would layover on their way to Baton Rouge or Sioux City and enjoy Mamma Sarah's muffins. Jed and Don pulled up outside and parked their dusty SUVs next to a phalanx of chopped motorcycles.
    A dozen eyes turned as they walked to the lunch counter. "Howdy boys !! Not seen you here recently " said the blowsy owner, flicking her dyed blonde hair cocquettishly. "Howdy Mamma" replied Jed politely. "We are looking for some pussy, but could sure do your muffins justice too !!" he explained.
    "Mamma's muffins are warm fresh and full of goodness boys, not sure i can say the same about the pussy !!" she wheezed, her cigarette dangling precariously from her garishly painted lips.
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    ****, you have an imagination and a half. I tip my hat :love:
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    Jed and Don sat down at a rickety table near the window. The other customers seemed to be the usual lowlifes and a sprinkling of truckers. A heavily-tattooed biker made his way over to their table. "Howdy boys, would you be needing anything special today ? " he enquired with an unsubtle wink, and indicating towards his female companions with an oil-stained thumb.
    " Hey Goatface, great to see you " said Jed. "We were maybe looking to party with some fine ladies this afternoon. Know what i mean ?"
    "Loretta and Shaney love to party" said Goatface, smoothing his tangled beard with muscular tattooed fingers.
    He beckoned to the two lovelies and they sauntered over, mottled thighs straining at their cut-off denim shorts.
    Mamma Sarah waddled up to the table and placed a large plate piled with steaming muffins in front of them and a pot of reheated coffee.
    "Y'all let me know if ya want anything else !!" she said, winking at Jed and running a swollen tongue over her cracked lips.
    "Thanks Mamma, we'll do that !!" he replied with a smile.
    Loretta and Shaney sat down at the table, Goatface headed back to his own table and watched discreetly.
    "Help yourself to muffins ladies !!" said Jed. Don had evidently taken a fancy to Loretta, a wiry brunette with improbably large fun bags. Jed offered the coffee to Shaney. She had been a cheerleader at Fillingham High several years previously and had once been an item with the notorious quarterback Duke Kawinski. Duke had made her turn tricks to finance his drug habit. Since splitting from the Neanderthal football star after one beating too many she had earned a precarious living working the truckstops and streetcorners of Cutter's Creek and nearby townships, peddling her generous ass for the price of a couple of rocks of crack or a wrap of ice.
    A flash of brilliant green and yellow at the window caught Jed's eye. He gasped in amazement.
    Conuropsis carolinensis was supposed to have been extinct in the USA since 1904 !!
    The Carolina Parakeet was the Holy Grail of Mississippi birdwatchers.
    Goatface had seen Jed's sudden excitement. He narrowed his suspicious eyes and followed Jed out of the door, drawing his concealed revolver from beneath his greasy leather jerkin.
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    Since solving the heinous crimes which had rocked the tight-knit community the previous year Troy Baker had kept himself to himself. He had quit the onerous PD job and now worked at Pier 29 restaurant with his fianceé Nancy.
    He was now on his way to work at the lakeside Pizza joint. A few blocks from the edge of town he thought he heard a gunshot. As he drew level with Mamma Sarah's notorious truckstop his old police instincts made him glance across.
    Something was not right. He reached under the seat for his sidearm.
    Troy recognised the weathered cowpoke Jed Mullins standing over a heavily tattoed man. Mullins was holding a pistol and before Troy could react he discharged it twice into the prone figure.
    Troy leapt out of his SUV clutching his prized Desert Eagle pistol and screamed at Mullins to drop his weapon.
    Jed complied and knelt sobbing on the dusty sidewalk next to the tattoed body.
    Meanwhile Mamma Sarah had called 911 and the Sheriff's officer, Bob Wheatley, quickly appeared in his cruiser with siren blaring.
    Troy explained what had occurred and handed the crypto-ornithologist into custody.
    The only words which Jed Mullins had uttered were "he shot the frigging parakeet" before relapsing into a stunned silence.
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    Jessica shivered in her Hallowe'en costume. Dwayne had purchased for her an emerald green dress accessorized with a pointy black hat. She had stuck some shamrock sequins on her face to complete the Irish Colleen look. Dwayne sported stripy green tights under a pair of lederhosen and green tartan shirt. A ginger wig and gnome hat were the finishing touches to his leprechaun outfit.
    They each carried a home-made lantern on a cane.
    Dwayne had already downed a quarter of Jack Daniels and was definitely in the party mood. Jessica was beginning to regret her choice of Hallowe'en theme. The dress hardly kept the chilly wind out. Dwayne could be such a ****.
    They wandered past the Mall towards the town square where they expected to find their friends.
    A few skaters were still infesting the dingy shopping area. They offered succinct opinions on Jessica's choice of costume.
    Ignoring the mall rats Jessica and Dwayne continued on their way, their lanterns dimly lighting the dark footway.
    They did not hear the steady footsteps which had tracked them since they left the lakeside condo.
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    Outside the burger joint a lively crowd of Hallowe'en merrymakers was gathered. Several of the girls appeared to be sporting Sarah Palin themed costumes with generous amounts of lipstick. For the boys the choice du jour was the President. Jessica squealed with pleasure as she saw her cheerleading buddies and was soon engaged in a girly yak-fest. Dwayne chewed the fat with the guys, accepting their racist Irish jokes with good humor. A new bottle of Bourbon appeared and rapidly dwindled as the young folk warmed themselves against the chilly Autumn night.
    One person was not enjoying the alcohol-fuelled bonhomie. A pair of steely blue eyes masked by a Batman mask scanned the crowd with military precision. A muscular hand caressed the sinister black handle of a snub-nosed Walther. It was all about timing and attention to detail. Attention to detail and timing. And luck.
    Just as the operation in Baghdad had gone pear-shaped when one team member had forgotten to tie their shoelace, tripping over and inadvertently loosing a shot over Saddam's shoulder.
    No more mistakes. If you want a job done properly do it yourself.
    Jessica disappeared into the burger bar to use the john. When she emerged twenty five minutes later the crowd had thinned as the young revellers began their trick-or-treat rounds of the local streets. There was no sign of Dwayne.
    She turned to her companion Mandy Lewenstein and expressed her mounting concern. "He wouldn't just go off without me, Mand. We always do the trick-or-treating together. People always give more that way."
    "Don't fret honey" said Mandy. "I'm sure he can't have gone far. What say we head up Oak Street to see if he has started on his own ?"
    Reluctantly Jessica agreed and followed Mandy, who was wearing a scary Andrea Dworkin outfit, towards the upscale townhouses of Oak Street.
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    (Original post by Alpha brah)
    hey dude/dudette !!

    please let me know if you want the plot to move in a certain way. i hope there has been enough shagging so far. it looks like Jessica won't get any surfer sausage action for a while as Dwayne has disappeared :eek::eek:
    maybe she will seek consolation in the arms of Mandy....

    PS be careful with those points !! i don't want you to get banned.

    :badger: :borat:
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    (Original post by the bear)
    hey dude/dudette !!

    please let me know if you want the plot to move in a certain way. i hope there has been enough shagging so far. it looks like Jessica won't get any surfer sausage action for a while as Dwayne has disappeared :eek::eek:
    maybe she will seek consolation in the arms of Mandy....

    PS be careful with those points !! i don't want you to get banned.

    :badger: :borat:
    Hey authorbear! You don't need to read too many of my posts on guys of a certain class to see that I'm a dudette haha

    Take the story whichever way you please, yes there's been enough lol. Too much and it comes across as a little Twilight-fan-fiction-ish (don't ask me how I know this xD). I'm more concerned about cowboy sausage than surfer sausage, just throw in a scene like that at some point and I'll be happy

    P.S. Yeah, trying to avoid a temp ban right now hehe!
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    (Original post by Alpha brah)
    Hey authorbear! You don't need to read too many of my posts on guys of a certain class to see that I'm a dudette haha

    Take the story whichever way you please, yes there's been enough lol. Too much and it comes across as a little Twilight-fan-fiction-ish (don't ask me how I know this xD). I'm more concerned about cowboy sausage than surfer sausage, just throw in a scene like that at some point and I'll be happy

    P.S. Yeah, trying to avoid a temp ban right now hehe!
    you've been a bad bad dudette to get so many points

    :spank:

    one cowboy sausage coming up now !!
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    (Original post by the bear)
    you've been a bad bad dudette to get so many points

    :spank:

    one cowboy sausage coming up now !!
    I'm a total prude in real life, it's just my sense of humour that's filthy! Overactive imagination methinks

    :cookie: Oh, excellent, will there be cowboys spanking too? :sly:
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    Meanwhile at Mamma Sarah's the commotion had abated. Troy sat down at the table with Don and the ladies, and picked nervously at the remaining muffin. So many bad memories had resurfaced. Memories which he had hoped never to revisit. The long hours spent at Dr Finkelstein's pouring out his grief for Leanne and their unborn child and the horrors of the Pumpkin Slayings... surely they were not in vain ?
    Meanwhile Don was consoling his wiry paramour Loretta. Shaney dabbed at her bloodshot eyes with a stained Kleenex. Now that Jed was in jail how would she earn the price of her next fix of crystal meth ? She put down the tissue and stretched out her tanned hand to Troy. She knew that he was balling Nancy Dubois from the Pizza restaurant, but hey, he was a man and clearly needed some comforting.
    "Hey Troy, you wanna **** ?" she enquired politely. Troy smiled and held up his hands to indicate no. "Hey thanks Shaney, i gotta keep those tadpoles for Nancy. We are trying for a baby ?".
    "How about you Don; could you manage both me and Loretta ?" she asked the weatherbeaten cow operative.
    "Hell yeah angel tits !!" he replied enthusiastically. Then with more caution "How will it work with y'know the price an' all ?"
    "Since this is a special occasion with Goatface being iced we can cut you a special deal Don. How about forty bucks for both of us ?"
    "Sounds like a great offer Shaney. Is that OK with you Loretta ?"
    "I guess; do you want some girl on girl included ?"
    "Sure why not honey... it would be great to see you touching down on Shaney's end zone" he chuckled lasciviously.
    "All righty !! Also if you want to spank us it will be another $3" said the savvy sex businesswoman, tweaking Don's left ass cheek playfully.
    "At least we don't have to cut Goatface in on the money now" said Loretta with a crooked grin.
    Mamma Sarah interrupted, a pot of coffee swaying dangerously from her swollen fingers: "Hey guys if you wanna party you can use the old RV in the yard out back. $20. Payable to the bank of cash. Now."
    Troy handed over a crumpled $20. He was quite happy to watch the proceedings whilst remaining faithful to Nancy.
    He whipped out his battered Nokia cell and rang Nancy. She would be wondering where he was. Wednesday was not their busiest night at Pier 29 but she would find it difficult to manage on her own.
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    (Original post by Alpha brah)
    I'm a total prude in real life, it's just my sense of humour that's filthy! Overactive imagination methinks

    :cookie: Oh, excellent, will there be cowboys spanking too? :sly:
    well one of the cowboys is in jail. the other one has just arranged some amore with the two hookers....
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    (Original post by the bear)
    well one of the cowboys is in jail. the other one has just arranged some amore with the two hookers....
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    Pierre Legrand was the duty lawyer on call for the Cutter's Creek PD when they brought Jed Mullins in. He was masturbating vigorously in his high-end hot tub when the summons came. "Hi Sheriff Daly, of course i am available. I am coming right now". Pierre was true to his word and shot a large wad of jism over the edge of the tub. It landed on top of his Bichon Frise. "OMG i am sorry about that Spock" he apologised as the startled pet fled towards the pumpkin patch.
    Twenty minutes later the avuncular lawyer was sitting opposite his new client. The interview room at the county jail was not luxuriously appointed. Pierre sat uncomfortably in a plastic chair and drummed his immaculately manicured fingers on the scarred wooden tabletop.
    He had come across Mullins several times before. Jed had pled guilty to several misdemeanour felonies and one DUI. Just typical cowpoke antics really ; Mullins was not a bad guy. Pierre was surprised that he was now facing a murder one rap, which in their state carried the death penalty. They still used the electric chair... Pierre had seen it in use once and was never able to visit a Burger King again.
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    On the corner of Oak Street the two young ladies halted. Ahead of them arose the unseemly disturbance of a brouhaha. All high excitements are of their nature transient; a fortiori those of a baser nature. Were we called upon to designate the details of this brouhaha it were sufficient to elaborate merely the sensory impressions which they provided to the young ladies; to wit, noise of an alarming intensity, shouts of half muffled obscenities, the unmistakeable debased lineaments of the violent male.
    "We have a task before us which must be speedily performed. We know that it will be ruinous to make delay. The most important crisis of our life calls, trumpet-tongued, for immediate energy and action!!" ejaculated Jessica. " It must, it shall be undertaken to-day, and yet we put it off until to-morrow; and why? There is no answer, except that we feel perverse, using the word with no comprehension of the principle. To-morrow arrives, and with it a more impatient anxiety to do our duty, but with this very increase of anxiety arrives, also, a nameless, a positively fearful, because unfathomable, craving for delay" she continued. "The last hour for action is at hand. We tremble with the violence of the conflict within us, — of the definite with the indefinite — of the substance with the shadow. But, if the contest have proceeded thus far, it is the shadow which prevails, — we struggle in vain. The clock strikes, and is the knell of our welfare. At the same time, it is the chanticleer-note to the ghost that has so long overawed us. It flies — it disappears — we are free. The old energy returns. We will labor now. Alas, it is too late!"
    Mandy waited patiently for Jessica to finish her peroration. "OK hun, you want us to act now already ?"
    "Pray do not tarry, for it is only by undertaking this perilous course of action instanter that we may transcend the natural bounds of our femininity and rescue he who by his own misadventure has strayed into the path of violence"
    "You mean Dwayne i guess ?" replied Mandy.
    "Damn right ...let's roll *****" affirmed her bosom companion.
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    Dwayne awoke in a strange room. How long had he been asleep ? He tried to move his body but he was securely pinioned by expertly fastened ropes. He was able to turn his head towards the window. Through a gap in the black velvet curtains he could glimpse the depressing orange glow of the streetlights. It was still night. The distant sounds of laughter and shouting could be heard as if from another country.
    A strange metallic taste lingered in Dwayne's muscular surfer mouth. He had tasted it once before... at the dentist's. The scene of his childhood humiliation returned unbidden. He had been given gas when his impacted wisdom teeth were removed. When he came round he had wet himself... and the pretty nurse had seen.
    But here was not the dentist's surgery. Even dentists did not tie their patients up with rope and put them in their bedroom, as far as Dwayne was aware.
    Gradually the events of the Hallowe'en evening returned to Dwayne's drug-fuddled mind. He remembered leaving Jessica in the john. He had waited twenty minutes for her then gave up and joined the other guys outside the bar. Then they had started trick or treating in Oak Street. Without the girls it was hard work and the householders were less generous. Still he had collected quite a few pieces of candy... but where were they ?
    "I expect you are wondering where you are young man, and what happened to your candy ?" said a chilling voice from the other side of the room.
    How many times had he heard that voice begging for mercy in high school ? Dwayne had taken great pleasure in bullying the more intellectual students at Fillingham High. His greatest achievement was to make Gilbert Meakins take an overdose.
    Gilbert had survived and was moved to another school for the rest of his education. Since then there were rumours that he had joined the military and done well there. Dwayne had no reason to think that Gilbert would return to exact revenge. How wrong he had been....
 
 
 
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