Fight with boyfriend - he got physical

He'll keep on doing it, leave him.

One thing i always think about these situations is, if he did that to you, there's no way of saying he wont do it again, or worse even, so you really need to talk to him about it (calmly)

Sorry this is a bit blunt, but just to establish - did you get physical with him at all? I'm not judging you at all as I haven't been in your situation.

Normally my reaction would be "get rid of him", but he's a long-term boyfriend who has never, ever acted like this before, and you were being immature. I'd say give him a chance. Maybe he was having a **** day. Christ, what he did wasn't nice, but what you did wasn't nice, and he clearly didn't hurt you that much. Don't forget emotional pain exists too - he wouldn't have gone out if he wasn't very upset himself, and maybe he's upset with what he did, maybe he's upset with the way you acted, I'd say probably both. I reckon you're both in a position to apologise to the other, so wait for him, sort out your differences, and from there it's up to you whether you (plural) want to finish it or not.

Sorry for not being more sympathetic but you answered your own question really.

Ok. No I don't expect sympathy or want this thread to turn into "Argh violent males! cull them all" because, as I said, it was the first time ever and, yes, I do accept that my behaviour was childish.

He didn't hurt me - not much. I think I'm more bothered that he didn't show care or concern afterwards. That's the really worrying thing.
When he was about to go out I did ask him where he was going and he just said "I'm sick of you."
While I can accept that I am in the wrong, surely he would have apologised? His coldheartedness scares me.

This I understand more. Maybe he is just an arsehole, maybe he's going to come home with his tail between his legs and admit he was angry. Either way you were both fairly nasty to each other, and I don't mean to stick up for him, but you will get plenty of people coming on here telling you precisely in what embarrassing way you should dump him, and I'm not a fan of revenge. So my advice to you is at least to wait until he comes back and see what he's like then. Maybe even give him a day or two. If he doesn't come back, or if he's still treating you like crap, then fine, chuck him.

On the other hand it may well just be another little row that escalated - everyone has them.

This I understand more. Maybe he is just an arsehole, maybe he's going to come home with his tail between his legs and admit he was angry. Either way you were both fairly nasty to each other, and I don't mean to stick up for him, but you will get plenty of people coming on here telling you precisely in what embarrassing way you should dump him, and I'm not a fan of revenge. So my advice to you is at least to wait until he comes back and see what he's like then. Maybe even give him a day or two. If he doesn't come back, or if he's still treating you like crap, then fine, chuck him.

On the other hand it may well just be another little row that escalated - everyone has them.

I hardly think that if she dumps him it would be out of revenge. What people are suggesting is that it may be dangerous for her to stay in the relationship.

Also, I don't think her saying "shut up" equates to him grabbing her throat.

I do agree however, with the wait and think on it approach.

I have decided to wait for him, but I have telephoned a mate and arranged to stay there this weekend, if necessary. Problem is, I live with my boyfriend, so he has to come back and it could be very uncomfortable.

I'd never go for the revenge thing - I really do care for him.

I hardly think that if she dumps him it would be out of revenge. What people are suggesting is that it may be dangerous for her to stay in the relationship.

Also, I don't think her saying "shut up" equates to him grabbing her throat.

I do agree however, with the wait and think on it approach.

No, but coming from a fairly violent family, I understand that sometimes lashing out is the only way some people know how to get through to others - especially if they're being immature. I personally would be perfectly happy to sit down and discuss things but if they're being childish that's just not possible, and some people go and stew in their rooms, some break things, some lash out. The fact that he didn't hurt her when he very much could have done shows that he didn't really want to hurt her - just that he wanted to make his anger acknowledged. The "revenge" thing wasn't about her dumping him, it was about the normal rubbish we get on these threads which is along the lines of "pretend to be nice to him then take him out with all his mates then kick him in the balls and tell him he's dumped lolz!", in true neo-feminist style.

I also don't agree with all these people coming on here who have no real experience of this sort of thing saying "It's never a one-off, leave him" or something equally succinct and unhelpful, really. That's why I'm playing devil's advocate more than giving a balanced judgement - because no one else will give a balanced judgement.