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Is being a miserable, cynical loser a huge turn-off?
Yes, the title might make you laugh. From observing friends and people around me who are successful with the ladies, it seems that they're all confident, upbeat, sociable, "fun" people.
The thing is, I'm told to be like that to attract girls but it's just not me at all. Are there girls who don't like the loud and confident type?
The thing is, I'm told to be like that to attract girls but it's just not me at all. Are there girls who don't like the loud and confident type?
Scroll to see replies
Reply 1
There are girls out there for everyone; every type of person you can imagine 
dont be something you aren't to get a girlfriend, you will get one and keep one for being yourself
dont be something you aren't to get a girlfriend, you will get one and keep one for being yourself Reply 2
Yes there are girls like that. The "miserable, cynical " types you talk of often attract girls who are into a bit of mystery and torturedsoulness.
And there are miserable, cynical girls too, of course...
And there are miserable, cynical girls too, of course...
Reply 4
Ronaldo, thanks. I get enough success not to complain but I sometimes wonder if not being a bit more fun and more confident doesn't ruin things. Any advice I get from people is always to be more sociable, be fun but that's just not me. I have a decent sense of humour well I think so anyway, but it's of the cynical kind (not everyone gets it unfortunately).
I just don't know what a girl would get out of a guy who's not much fun and is a bit unsociable.
I just don't know what a girl would get out of a guy who's not much fun and is a bit unsociable.
Reply 5
i cant help being a bit downbeat and miserable..its just my thing!
im not an emo or anything like that, i just dont have one of those happy 24/7 smile faces, even when im really pleased i can look only 'ok'
but we cant help who we are, and im happy in my 'moody and whity' neiche really
im not an emo or anything like that, i just dont have one of those happy 24/7 smile faces, even when im really pleased i can look only 'ok'
but we cant help who we are, and im happy in my 'moody and whity' neiche really
I completely don't go for loud and confident! It makes me feel uncomfortable, and I feel like all the other girls will be going for a guy like that! I hate competition! People like you seem more interesting and mysterious, they have more substance and you want to get closer to them and know them better Plus I think it's much sexier. Maybe you just have been unlucky or haven't found a nice girl yet? Someone not too shallow to appreciate you
Plus I think it's much sexier. Maybe you just have been unlucky or haven't found a nice girl yet? Someone not too shallow to appreciate you Reply 7
bunthulhu
I feel like all the other girls will be going for a guy like that! I hate competition!
That's exactly what I feared
but a lot of girls want the best they can get and what will make them look good... so girls who go for that kind of guy only go because they're seen as "not so good" and so are less hard to get. Thanks for the post anyway
It's nice to know not everyone is shallow.
Reply 9
What d'you have to be to be a lost soul?
I'd describe myself as a bit miserable (though I can be very upbeat at times, unsociable, (don't know about fun), and a little depressed. But I certainly wouldn't call myself a lost soul.
I'd describe myself as a bit miserable (though I can be very upbeat at times, unsociable, (don't know about fun), and a little depressed. But I certainly wouldn't call myself a lost soul.
Reply 12
Anonymous
Yes, the title might make you laugh. From observing friends and people around me who are successful with the ladies, it seems that they're all confident, upbeat, sociable, "fun" people.
The thing is, I'm told to be like that to attract girls but it's just not me at all. Are there girls who don't like the loud and confident type?
The thing is, I'm told to be like that to attract girls but it's just not me at all. Are there girls who don't like the loud and confident type?
Who would you choose?
Reply 13
Cynical is ok. I like a guy with a dark sense of humor.
Miserable is alright in small doses. Nobody wants to date Mr Sunshine.
Losers, no. I would say the majority of women would like to meet a guy who has a bit of direction in his life.
Miserable is alright in small doses. Nobody wants to date Mr Sunshine.
Losers, no. I would say the majority of women would like to meet a guy who has a bit of direction in his life.
Reply 15
What???? 
Sticky
That's exactly what I feared but a lot of girls want the best they can get and what will make them look good... so girls who go for that kind of guy only go because they're seen as "not so good" and so are less hard to get.
Thanks for the post anyway It's nice to know not everyone is shallow.
but a lot of girls want the best they can get and what will make them look good... so girls who go for that kind of guy only go because they're seen as "not so good" and so are less hard to get. Thanks for the post anyway
It's nice to know not everyone is shallow.Hun those girls are the sort you don't want, they're only in it for themselves! They go for the 'obviously attractive' guys. Personally I don't find 'obviously attractive', very attractive at all!!
Those girls wouldn't be any fun to go out with so don't worry yourself about them. There are always going to be nicer girls who would choose you over that kind of guy, any day 
Segat1
TBH someone who is morose, cynical, critical and sounds like Eeyore all the time is not going to float my boat. It would be like having a dishcloth on your shoulder - all wet and drippy.
Oh, Eeyore is adorable.
Better than Tigger.
Tigger and Eeyore are like metaphors for manic-depression.
Or maybe not...
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