Go to first unread
Back
to top
Maths Christmas Jokes!
Watch
Announcements
Hi everyone,
Basically, I'm writing a Christmas card for my maths teacher and I need some funny Christmassy jokes (not rude) to put in it. Any ideas?
Thank you!
Basically, I'm writing a Christmas card for my maths teacher and I need some funny Christmassy jokes (not rude) to put in it. Any ideas?
Thank you!
1
reply
Report
#2
Why do mathematicians confuse Halloween and Christmas?
Because 31 Oct = 25 Dec.
The play on words lies in the similarity of the abbreviation for October/Octal and December/Decimal, and the coincidence that the two representations equal the same amount (31 Octal is
Decimal).
Because 31 Oct = 25 Dec.
The play on words lies in the similarity of the abbreviation for October/Octal and December/Decimal, and the coincidence that the two representations equal the same amount (31 Octal is
Decimal).
e^x, sinx and cosx went to a party. A while after they arrived sinx and cosx saw e^x sitting in the corner all on his own so they went over to ask what was wrong. He replied that whenever he tried to integrate he just ended up with himself.
4
reply
Report
#3
(non-christmassy, sorry) "Captain Ahab didn`t have any difficulty in hunting down Mobius **** -being that he was of infinite surface area!"
(yes, I can hear the groans - the "perfect" Christmas cracker joke!)
(yes, I can hear the groans - the "perfect" Christmas cracker joke!)
1
reply
Report
#4
What did the mathematician say after eating Christmas dinner? 
Pronounce the fraction as 'a over b'.
Pronounce the fraction as 'a over b'.
10
reply
Report
#6
(Original post by Prepotency)
What did the mathematician say after eating Christmas dinner?
Pronounce the fraction as 'a over b'.
What did the mathematician say after eating Christmas dinner?
Pronounce the fraction as 'a over b'.
2
reply
Report
#7
(Original post by euphrosyne)
You can't mix Maths with Christmas! Maths is yuck whilst Christmas isn't
Posted from TSR Mobile
You can't mix Maths with Christmas! Maths is yuck whilst Christmas isn't
Posted from TSR Mobile
0
reply
Report
#9
(Original post by Prepotency)
What did the mathematician say after eating Christmas dinner?
Pronounce the fraction as 'a over b'.
What did the mathematician say after eating Christmas dinner?
Pronounce the fraction as 'a over b'.
1
reply
Report
#11
Q: How is an artificial christmas tree like the fourth root of -68? A: Neither has real roots
Posted from TSR Mobile
Posted from TSR Mobile
0
reply
Report
#12
(Original post by Prepotency)
What did the mathematician say after eating Christmas dinner?
Pronounce the fraction as 'a over b'.
What did the mathematician say after eating Christmas dinner?
Pronounce the fraction as 'a over b'.
So would you say 'i over 8'. Aaaaaaaahhhhhh ok never mind I get it
0
reply
Report
#13
(Original post by ihatebrownbread)
I actually don't get it. Can you explain?
I actually don't get it. Can you explain?
0
reply
Report
#14
M is M*
2.718 is the base of natural logarithms known as*e
*r*squared is*rr*the
inverse of 1/y*is*y
the square root of*x*is just*x*
force divided by acceleration is mass
Merry xmass*
I found this.
Posted from TSR Mobile
2.718 is the base of natural logarithms known as*e
*r*squared is*rr*the
inverse of 1/y*is*y
the square root of*x*is just*x*
force divided by acceleration is mass
Merry xmass*
I found this.
Posted from TSR Mobile
0
reply
Report
#15
(Original post by euphrosyne)
You can't mix Maths with Christmas! Maths is yuck whilst Christmas isn't
Posted from TSR Mobile
You can't mix Maths with Christmas! Maths is yuck whilst Christmas isn't
Posted from TSR Mobile
1
reply
Report
#18
(Original post by euphrosyne)
I lied, a little
Maths IS fun, only when you get it though 
I lied, a little
Maths IS fun, only when you get it though 
Spoiler:
Show
I'm sorry 
0
reply
Report
#19
The cocky exponential function ex is strolling along the road insulting the functions he sees walking by. He scoffs at a wandering polynomial for the shortness of its Taylor series. He snickers at a passing smooth function of compact support and its glaring lack of a convergent power series about many of its points. He positively laughs as he passes |x| for being nondifferentiable at the origin. He smiles, thinking to himself, "Damn, it's great to be ex. I'm real analytic everywhere. I'm my own derivative. I blow up faster than anybody and shrink faster too. All the other functions suck."
Lost in his own egomania, he collides with the constant function 3, who is running in terror in the opposite direction.
"What's wrong with you? Why don't you look where you're going?" demands ex. He then sees the fear in 3's eyes and says "You look terrified!"
"I am!" says the panicky 3. "There's a differential operator just around the corner. If he differentiates me, I'll be reduced to nothing! I've got to get away!" With that, 3 continues to dash off.
"Stupid constant," thinks ex. "I've got nothing to fear from a differential operator. He can keep differentiating me as long as he wants, and I'll still be there."
So he scouts off to find the operator and gloat in his smooth glory. He rounds the corner and defiantly introduces himself to the operator. "Hi. I'm ex."
"Hi. I'm d / dy."
Lost in his own egomania, he collides with the constant function 3, who is running in terror in the opposite direction.
"What's wrong with you? Why don't you look where you're going?" demands ex. He then sees the fear in 3's eyes and says "You look terrified!"
"I am!" says the panicky 3. "There's a differential operator just around the corner. If he differentiates me, I'll be reduced to nothing! I've got to get away!" With that, 3 continues to dash off.
"Stupid constant," thinks ex. "I've got nothing to fear from a differential operator. He can keep differentiating me as long as he wants, and I'll still be there."
So he scouts off to find the operator and gloat in his smooth glory. He rounds the corner and defiantly introduces himself to the operator. "Hi. I'm ex."
"Hi. I'm d / dy."
2
reply
X
Quick Reply
Today on TSR
-
Ofqual consultationTeachers to use 'mini-exams' and other work to decide grades
- Is it too late to do well in my A-levels?
- What Harry Potter house are you in?
- 2021 wellbeing blog launch
- Student tips on lockdown mental health