i'm 18 and my bf is 41 so is it possible to have a success marriage?

we are getting married next month and i just moved in with him, we are excellent together but people warn me against it sometimes

That's a fairly big age gap. Are you sure you want to get married at 18? Do you have any ambitions or dreams you would like to pursue? A lot of them won't be possible after you get married. You'll be pregnant before you know and wandering around with babies will pretty much take up so much of your time you'll be in tears. You're 18, you've your whole life ahead of you. You can go to university.


Any particular reason why you're jumping into marriage this early? From what I've seen a lot of people screw up their marriage when they marry at a fairly young age. I, personally, would want to mature a bit more before I decide to marry. I'm 22 now and I won't even think about it before 26

Not a good idea. Believe me, no normal 41 year-old would date (let alone propose to) someone who's 18. I don't mean to be judgemental, but it's in your best interests to steer clear of him.

This. OP, please don't do it. Not because I'm against the idea of marrying young, but because this guy is far too old for you and sounds like a bit of a creep. He'll die years before you and you'll be left on your own, probably as a single mother with kids. Is that what you really want?

Just no.

I know intelligent, educated people in relationships and marriages with exactly this kind of age gap and are very happy and stable. It's prejudice of the worst kind to declare someone a creep on the basis of almost zero information - not to mention blatant ageism.

On the second point - have you even given this a second's thought? If he dies at age 70 (a bit young by modern standards), they would have had a 30 year marriage and any children would very likely be adults.

i would disown you if you were my daughter . And i cant even say what i would do to him on this sort of forum

Don't listen to what people say.

If you want to do it, then do it, the only people's business it is is yours and his

It just reaffirms the fact that men in their 40s can easily bag girls in their early 20s. That's not too bad considering I'll reach that age someday. Fair play to him I suppose.

Is there any reason why he hasn't been able to date someone his own age....or generation?

Just yes.

And what if they split up before he dies? She'll be left on her own! Sure, her kids might be grown ups, but ...

It's not ageism, if I saw a middle aged bloke with a young female out and about ... let's be honest, that's a bit I know age is just a number, but young women are impressionable and he could be taking advantage of her ...