Am I THAT rare as a virgin? Watch

Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 5 years ago
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Hey, so basically I'm 19, in my second year of uni, and recently I've met quite a lot of new people and somehow the fact that I'm still a virgin has come up in conversation. Without fail, this revelation has caused a reaction of disbelief; people act as if it's completely bizarre. (All guys, if that's relevant)

When asking why it's so shocking that I haven't had sex yet, people have said that I'm attractive and confident so I really should have had sex by now which kind of took me by surprise.

It's not a conscious decision I've made to not have it, and I have turned a few male friends down who have openly said they would like to sleep with me... basically it just hasn't felt right yet, and I'm in no rush to do it just for the sake of it, is that REALLY so rare at almost 20?! Also, would it put guys off? I'm not especially bothered if it does, as if anyone's shallow enough to lose interest due to that then they don't really sound like the kind of guy I'd want to date, but just out of interest really. Thanks
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username418231
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#2
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No.
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Odd socks
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No, it's pretty common


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halliee
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I have quite a few friends who are 19 and are virgins, I don't think it's weird
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squealia
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Not rare at all I am the same! and it defo doesn't put the guys off.... infact I think they like it!
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awe
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Definitely not rare! ^^
I think the only issue behind it is that, if you do decide to sleep with someone at university within an 'nsa' situation, the fact that you are a virgin may make them slightly reluctant to do the deed. Stupidly, virginity is generally considered some sort of 'gift' or commodity, and some men may feel that, having been given that 'gift', they are now somewhat indebted to you and more serious feelings will emerge. Some may not care, but some may be hesitant to enter into what could be more than they are 'asking' for. It's all daft. I didn't tell my boyfriend that I was a virgin before we slept together, it didn't come up until about 7 months into our relationship and then in passing, very casually. He was so surprised haha. I never 'felt' like a virgin because apart from obvious physical aspects, I think the concept is silly and can be harmful. So there was no need for me to tell him, it affected nothing.
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Flexa
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#7
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Guys like virgin girls (sometimes)
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QI Elf
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#8
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No its not rare. Most people just don't talk about it. I'm 24 and still a virgin. Its no big deal.
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sausageez
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#9
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nah it's not rare but a lot of ppl had that reaction towards me too before i lost mine :/
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xDave-
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#10
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It's pretty common


































on TSR
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Jellybeany
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#11
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Its not rare at all - wish id waited! I was young and thought i was in love and all that.

Wait till its right for you! I know lots of people that are still virgins but, like others have said, they don't seem to talk about it. Its their choice in the end anyway.

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Oliver Queen
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#12
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No. More young adults are actually virgin than not. Don't believe statistics because everyone lies.
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LukeM90
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#13
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I don't think it's a big deal at all, most people I know (myself included) didn't lose theirs till the age(s) ranging between 19-24
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Legendairy
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Yes everyone lost it at 16 , you are the only one of your kind
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Anonymous #1
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thanks for the replies everyone.

(Original post by Oliver Queen)
No. More young adults are actually virgin than not. Don't believe statistics because everyone lies.
I guess it's just weird for me as all my friends/ most people I meet at uni are not virgins, and everyone's shocked reaction makes me feel like I'm not 'normal' in still being a virgin, and also not being fussed about losing it. but you're probably right, I'm guessing some people must be making themselves out to be having a lot more sex than they are





(Original post by awe)
Definitely not rare! ^^
I think the only issue behind it is that, if you do decide to sleep with someone at university within an 'nsa' situation, the fact that you are a virgin may make them slightly reluctant to do the deed. Stupidly, virginity is generally considered some sort of 'gift' or commodity, and some men may feel that, having been given that 'gift', they are now somewhat indebted to you and more serious feelings will emerge. Some may not care, but some may be hesitant to enter into what could be more than they are 'asking' for. It's all daft. I didn't tell my boyfriend that I was a virgin before we slept together, it didn't come up until about 7 months into our relationship and then in passing, very casually. He was so surprised haha. I never 'felt' like a virgin because apart from obvious physical aspects, I think the concept is silly and can be harmful. So there was no need for me to tell him, it affected nothing.

Oh I know exactly what you mean! It seems a lot of guys think that if they take a girl's virginity she'll inevitably get attached, but most of my friends who have lost it to a guy who didn't want more weren't attached at all, just another of these silly things associated with it. You're right, it can be a very unhealthy concept, at the end of the day it is what you make of it I guess.
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ilex_noemi
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I was a virgin at 20.

If you don't want to yet then don't. It is common but even if it wasn't, it shouldn't matter.
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SoftPunch
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#17
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(Original post by Bassetts)
You're obsessed with me and my virginity!
:youbetcha: Just wanted to make OP feel better You're obsessed with you and your virginity!
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sr90
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#18
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It's not a bad thing, people just get surprised because it's not something that comes up in conversation regularly. I tend to assume that any girl who looks good and acts confident in herself has lost hers, and i'm sure women will do the same with men. Recently found out one of my friends is still a virgin even though she's incredibly attractive and has had a boyfriend for a while. I was very surprised when I found out, but I didn't look down on her or anything.

Besides, it's a lot more common than you think. People lie or just don't say anything at all.
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EmmaJW
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#19
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I'm 19 and a virgin. I don't think it's a problem. Why do we want to live in a society that pressures teens into it. Keep it until you're ready, there's no rush. Would you rather it meant something or just because you hate the title!?


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summer26
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Hey, so basically I'm 19, in my second year of uni, and recently I've met quite a lot of new people and somehow the fact that I'm still a virgin has come up in conversation. Without fail, this revelation has caused a reaction of disbelief; people act as if it's completely bizarre. (All guys, if that's relevant)

When asking why it's so shocking that I haven't had sex yet, people have said that I'm attractive and confident so I really should have had sex by now which kind of took me by surprise.

It's not a conscious decision I've made to not have it, and I have turned a few male friends down who have openly said they would like to sleep with me... basically it just hasn't felt right yet, and I'm in no rush to do it just for the sake of it, is that REALLY so rare at almost 20?! Also, would it put guys off? I'm not especially bothered if it does, as if anyone's shallow enough to lose interest due to that then they don't really sound like the kind of guy I'd want to date, but just out of interest really. Thanks
come to asia, everyone's a virgin here
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